when to start dating while separating/divorcing

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Start the minute you both say separate or divorced.

No one willingly dates someone that is separated and going through drama. Heck no. Divorced, drama is over. Perhaps that person has been to therapy and reflected on their role in the divorce.

Reconnected with my second wife the moment the first wife and I agreed to separate. I’ve been happily married to my second wife now seventeen years.

[Anonymous]

What does “reconnected” mean?

Like she was the affair partner so you reconnected? Or you were first loved before and reconnected?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Start the minute you both say separate or divorced.

No one willingly dates someone that is separated and going through drama. Heck no. Divorced, drama is over. Perhaps that person has been to therapy and reflected on their role in the divorce.

Reconnected with my second wife the moment the first wife and I agreed to separate. I’ve been happily married to my second wife now seventeen years.

What does this mean exactly?

“Reconnected” with a specific woman the “moment” you (verbally) “agreed” to separate with legal wife?

[Anonymous]

My ex started dating after a few months. When I heard about it, I decided to date too. Both of us were much happier after that. No need to wait for divorce. After I was officially divorced, I was happy to date separated people. Ex and I are both with people we met online. Ex met ex's long term partner while still separated.

Being with someone who appreciates you, sexually and otherwise, makes a huge difference!

[Anonymous]

I think it depends. If you have minor children I would wait and focus on them for awhile. If you do date only go out when your ex has the children— at least for awhile after separating.

My child has a friend and their parents are recently divorced. One parent gets the kid 50% or less of the time and still gets babysitters or drops the kid off at friends houses so they can go out on dates. The child is sad about it.

My aunt had an affair and is now married to her AP. She never stopped seeing this guy and it impacted her two kids even though they were in high school.

My uncle waited, didn’t date, worked on himself and then started seriously seeing someone a couple years ago. He made it clear he won’t ever marry again. She is very nice and into the same things he is into and she is also divorced with an adult child. They are both happier but I saw first hand that how my uncle handled it was better for the kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Start the minute you both say separate or divorced.

No one willingly dates someone that is separated and going through drama. Heck no. Divorced, drama is over. Perhaps that person has been to therapy and reflected on their role in the divorce.

Reconnected with my second wife the moment the first wife and I agreed to separate. I’ve been happily married to my second wife now seventeen years.

Lol

[Anonymous]

OP, at least consider the possibility that nothing has been keeping you from meeting people. Not marriage, not a signed piece of paper, not a specific date on the calendar. Sounds like you believe you haven't been life to the fullest and want to blame your marriage. We'll see.