Three private school rejections

[Anonymous]

Those of you with prepandemic experience of MCPS or private schools may not have up to date information. The landscape has shifted significantly in the past 5 years. Giving people hope of being accepted into mainstream schools or summer admission to supportive programs within MCPS when moving from out of the district is not necessarily kind.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kid did well in MCPS; maybe it’s school-dependent.

How long ago? When were they diagnosed? What kind of supports did they need? How stable was the SPED faculty year upon year? People are leaving these jobs in droves and it’s difficult to keep the supportive programs running.

[Anonymous]

As the parent of a child with a deficit in the area of social skills, I agree with posters who state you should be looking at schools like Parkmont, Nora and Fusion. I decided to go to Deal to check it out myself and although I enrolled our child, I knew instantly that it would not work, as much as I may have wanted it to. So we never sent our kid. Our kid is now in HS and at one of these schools and this is the max of what they can handle socially. And they still do not have any close close friends who they actually hang out with and it continues to be a struggle. We provide a ld the social activities, similar to what we did when they were in early elementary. It is exhausting but we hope that they will slowly develop more ease and acceptable social skills. We have also considered programs like Social Grace and Alvord Baker but have not yet done them.

[Anonymous]

The issue may be the timing-you may have applied when there is a high likelihood of many people trying to get just a few spots. There are usually entry years when there are way more spaces. You may want to get a private school consultant to help you play the game.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. We worked with an educational consultant. DS IEP is lightweight because it only has 3 hours of services per month focused on executive functioning and social communication. No academic supports. We applied to McLean after meeting with Admissions and getting their OK to proceed. We are in NW DC but would consider moving to be in-boundary to Tilden MS which has a 2e program. The other schools were Field and Burke.

You keep saying lightweight but as someone else said an IEP is not lightweight, a 504 is. Keep him in a public school where they have to legally accommodate him. Or apply to lab.

No there are absolutely IEPs with different levels of support. Some students have more involved needs than others.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The issue may be the timing-you may have applied when there is a high likelihood of many people trying to get just a few spots. There are usually entry years when there are way more spaces. You may want to get a private school consultant to help you play the game.

Schools like Diener, Parkmont, and Nora are used to mid year and out of season transfers. Don’t waste your time with consultants. You already went that route and, as you can see, they often don’t know the special education landscape.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:With an ASD diagnosis, you are stuck with public school. Even if you got rid of the IEP, there would still be the diagnosis.
Is it possible to get another eval that removes the diagnosis?

You can lose a diagnosis, so they do the ADOS but you don’t qualify for the diagnosis. Not common though, usually see this with kids that start services VERY early, like 12-24 months.

NP. Can we go back to the developmental pediatrician and ask for a second ADOS? Our child got an ASD diagnosis at 22 months, but things are very different now at age 6.

At age 6, you can have a full neuropsych, including (but not limited to) ADOS. Even if they are still autistic, a 6 year old looks really different from a not yet 2 year old and you'll likely learn a lot about their support needs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:With an ASD diagnosis, you are stuck with public school. Even if you got rid of the IEP, there would still be the diagnosis.
Is it possible to get another eval that removes the diagnosis?

You can lose a diagnosis, so they do the ADOS but you don’t qualify for the diagnosis. Not common though, usually see this with kids that start services VERY early, like 12-24 months.

NP. Can we go back to the developmental pediatrician and ask for a second ADOS? Our child got an ASD diagnosis at 22 months, but things are very different now at age 6.

NP. You can do that. I want to say though-I guess my feeling reading this is that you might end up disappointed if the dx is still ASD. My dc is now 10. 10 looks very different than 6, which looked different than 22 months. They are still a person with ASD, an autistic person (they are 2E as well).

OP, I am not local and don't know about the schools there. I know where I am, that any school that I'd have to 'hide' their dx, would be a poor fit for my dc.

[Anonymous]

For whatever reason my kids who are not on the spectrum (MCPS) have a ton of friends who are on the spectrum but mainstreamed (and one who needed to switch for a more supportive program). My observation is that boys on the spectrum at our MCPS school do ok socially and have friends but girls with ASD really tend to be a little more isolated. I can’t speak to whether they are getting the academic supports parents would want but it’s not an environment where they stand out as the only quirky kid and they find their crew.

[Anonymous]

+1 on the Sycamore and Parkmont recommendations. While we loved Green Acres, they really made it clear that with the bigger classes and no additional support that they couldn't really handle any special needs. We figured that we wanted less pressure, where a kid would still be well supported even if they have a messy day. Keeping it together all of the time, is a lot to ask of a middle schooler that sometimes has 'quirky' behavior. We looked both Field and Green Acres, but ultimately went a different route which has worked out fantastically. Good luck!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:With an ASD diagnosis, you are stuck with public school. Even if you got rid of the IEP, there would still be the diagnosis.
Is it possible to get another eval that removes the diagnosis?

You can lose a diagnosis, so they do the ADOS but you don’t qualify for the diagnosis. Not common though, usually see this with kids that start services VERY early, like 12-24 months.

NP. Can we go back to the developmental pediatrician and ask for a second ADOS? Our child got an ASD diagnosis at 22 months, but things are very different now at age 6.

NP. You can do that. I want to say though-I guess my feeling reading this is that you might end up disappointed if the dx is still ASD. My dc is now 10. 10 looks very different than 6, which looked different than 22 months. They are still a person with ASD, an autistic person (they are 2E as well).

OP, I am not local and don't know about the schools there. I know where I am, that any school that I'd have to 'hide' their dx, would be a poor fit for my dc.

+1. Sibling and spouse get their older child tested despite preschool all but begging them to and many indicators of ASD. Child was in K at mainstream private this year and apparently ‘loves it’ but was asked my school to undergo neuropsych due to inattention and social deficits a few months ago. I assume the school will try to work with them, but the social supports they offer are limited. Avoiding testing so as to prevent a dx from being shared or holding back a dx don’t always result in a better outcome.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:With an ASD diagnosis, you are stuck with public school. Even if you got rid of the IEP, there would still be the diagnosis.
Is it possible to get another eval that removes the diagnosis?

You can lose a diagnosis, so they do the ADOS but you don’t qualify for the diagnosis. Not common though, usually see this with kids that start services VERY early, like 12-24 months.

NP. Can we go back to the developmental pediatrician and ask for a second ADOS? Our child got an ASD diagnosis at 22 months, but things are very different now at age 6.

NP. You can do that. I want to say though-I guess my feeling reading this is that you might end up disappointed if the dx is still ASD. My dc is now 10. 10 looks very different than 6, which looked different than 22 months. They are still a person with ASD, an autistic person (they are 2E as well).

OP, I am not local and don't know about the schools there. I know where I am, that any school that I'd have to 'hide' their dx, would be a poor fit for my dc.

+1. Sibling and spouse didn’t get their older child tested despite preschool all but begging them to and many indicators of ASD. Child was in K at a mainstream private this year and apparently ‘loves it’ but was asked my school to undergo a neuropsych due to inattention and social deficits a few months ago. I assume the school will try to work with the child, but the social supports they offer are limited. Avoiding testing so as to prevent a dx from being shared or holding back a dx doesn’t always result in a better outcome.

Edited for clarity/typos

[Anonymous]

Fusion wasn’t great for us. They over promised and under delivered and I felt like my dc spent way too much time sitting around staring at her phone there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, OP, I wouldn’t disclose the ASD to the independent schools until a while after DC started. They won't notice during the interview process.

I work at an independent school that says it can't accommodate kids with ASD but in reality, we have so many kids who are neurodivergent. Many have never been diagnosed. Your kid will would be completely fine. You just need to get through the door right now.

Absolutely terrible advice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, OP, I wouldn’t disclose the ASD to the independent schools until a while after DC started. They won't notice during the interview process.

I work at an independent school that says it can't accommodate kids with ASD but in reality, we have so many kids who are neurodivergent. Many have never been diagnosed. Your kid will would be completely fine. You just need to get through the door right now.

Absolutely terrible advice.

Translation: They want your money and then will counsel you out