How can I exhibit high value traits while not being attractive?

[Anonymous]

Find a good guy who is in decent shape but has an ugly face. After you know/love someone they are attractive to you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I just can’t with this thread. There’s a lid for every pot OP. Check out that cyber nerd who just got 25 years in prison. His girlfriend is the opposite of a looker. Be comfortable with who you are and you’ll be fine. Learn to like yourself.

Seriously. Everything this thread seems to suggest is "change who you are so randos like how you look" and... eww. That's so sad!

OP, get over the idea of being bait for a concept. "High value people" don't actually exist. Decide what YOU value, and then do more of it. This will make you plenty attractive to the right kind of potential partners for actual you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hi OP. Hugs.

Ugh, all of this advice to attract people who place value on looks when you are in fact slender and healthy is nauseating. If you are worried that your facial features won't attract people, I would stay away from the vapid hell hole that is the online dating world. Perhaps join meetup groups or other in-person activities that match your interests and find connections from there.

In the meantime, find joys in connections with friends, family, pets, hobbies, nature, volunteering, work, and other known facets of your life that make you smile and carry you through your days.

I wish you well!

Agree. Also, look for men in your league, so to speak, and try to find someone that matches your energy. If you are bubbly, you want someone who is similar, etc. Some women think they are prettier than they actually are, because their face is symmetrical. Of course, they wonder why they keep attracting vapid, even though they are also vapid. Symmetry is not everything. You want to be with a good, nice person that likes you for you, not because your nose looks a certain way (or doesn't).

Almost every couple we know has different personalities. I don’t necessarily think a bubbly girl should be with a bubbly guy. If OP has a good personality and nice figure, I’m sure she can get someone. He may not be physically attractive or a high earner but she can find someone kind who is less superficial. Nice shiny hair and flattering clothing should help.

Well, there you go, OP. That's your target demo.

[Anonymous]

I'm having a relationship with a chocolate cake right now and I am SO happy. - JBF

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hate to say it but in reality JDBF.

We get it, you’re trendy. But could you take the extra 3 seconds & write out your f’ing words?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you come from family money or have a prestigious education and/or career?

That should help.

If you are not attractive, not rich and not well educated, it may be much more difficult to find a high value man.

If you are looking for high quality men vs high value men, your parameters may be different.

What is the difference between high quality and high value?

I assume different people value different traits. Men often place high value on beauty and attraction. If the man is not initially physically attracted to a woman, it is a non starter. Women can be attracted to less attractive men and be attracted to their personality and potential financial stability. OP may have to settle for less in looks since she herself said she is not attractive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hate to say it but in reality JDBF.

We get it, you’re trendy. But could you take the extra 3 seconds & write out your f’ing words?

What is JBF and JDBF?

Is BF butterface?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hate to say it but in reality JDBF.

We get it, you’re trendy. But could you take the extra 3 seconds & write out your f’ing words?

What is JBF and JDBF?

Is BF butterface?

Already answered. RTFF

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You need to get more attractive. Go to the gym, change your diet, change your wardrobe, change your hair style/color, wear some subtle makeup. If you need to get your skin or teeth fixed professionally, do it. You are an adult; time to act like one if you want to get married.

This is OP. I actually already eat incredibly healthfully and while not athletic, I regularly workout by going to barre and pilates and walking plenty.I am slender although a size 4 and 6.

My problem is I have an ugly face. I have an odd and asymmetrical face shape along with a large asymmetrical nose. Even expensive makeup doesn't help!

Men are visual creatures, as PP noted. If you don't pass their immediate review, you won't get a second chance.

If you want a high value man, then you need to invest in rhinoplasty. Get three consults with reputable plastic surgeons (see the Beauty forum) and get the surgery done this summer. The consults may result in other recommendations that you aren't considering. Don't put it off. Change your look and improve your chances in the dating world.

Do not rush a rhinoplasty decision. There are tons of "rhinoplasty specialists" who post their few great results on socials. Then you turn a few rocks abd you'll find a ton of unhappy patients with bad results.

You need a surgeon with state of the art technique and a keen aesthetic eye. Spend at least a year on research, finding private chat groups, reading negative reviews and so on before you decide. You need to gointo consults with a clear idea of what you want but without sounding too demanding.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:All the dating advice says to not be desperate and filter and only wait until a guy pursues you.

But what do you do if you’re not attractive enough to be noticed by the good guys just by doing your own thing? I find I have to make the first move to show I’m interested and then work hard to keep their interest and show my value.

Just sitting around waiting to be picked doesn’t work if you aren’t attractive and chased by lots of eligible men!

Are you trying to attract good guys or attractive guys? Your looks can prevent you from getting with conventionally attractive men, but they're not relevant to whether the guy you want is good or not.

[Anonymous]

https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/90/1183619.page