Sorority Rush

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was a first gen student. I had zero interest in joining a sorority. Nobody in my social group growing up had any experience with them, so it was not on my radar.

Moving forward, my daughter is rushing this week. We are supporting her, a little reluctantly though. All the girls she has met her first semester are also rushing. Her school does not ask for recommendation letters from previous members, thank God, because we really don’t have those connections.

My question is, how disadvantaged is a first gen student who is rushing at one of the schools where they still ask for rec letters? Is that system in place to continue keeping the “poors” out of the greek system? Also, don’t get me started on how expensive some of those soroties cost. Just another reason why they are so out of reach for most first gen students.

Your daughter is not first gen. You were.

This post smells weird.

I am the OP. I never said my daughter was first gen. I was asking how do first gen students get rec letters at schools where these are mandatory? My daughter attends a school where rec letters are not required.

To add, as a first gen student myself, I do not have sorority connections within my social circles, so it would have been hard to help my daughter get letters. I am glad to hear many sororities have dropped the letters of rec requirement. I did see a mom I know on facebook asking for letters for her daughter at Bama. I guess they still ask for them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was a first gen student. I had zero interest in joining a sorority. Nobody in my social group growing up had any experience with them, so it was not on my radar.

Moving forward, my daughter is rushing this week. We are supporting her, a little reluctantly though. All the girls she has met her first semester are also rushing. Her school does not ask for recommendation letters from previous members, thank God, because we really don’t have those connections.

My question is, how disadvantaged is a first gen student who is rushing at one of the schools where they still ask for rec letters? Is that system in place to continue keeping the “poors” out of the greek system? Also, don’t get me started on how expensive some of those soroties cost. Just another reason why they are so out of reach for most first gen students.

Your daughter is not first gen. You were.

This post smells weird.

I am the OP. I never said my daughter was first gen. I was asking how do first gen students get rec letters at schools where these are mandatory? My daughter attends a school where rec letters are not required.

You contact the sorority's local chapter where you live and ask if they'd be willing to connect you with someone who can write a letter. Many are willing to do it but may want to meet for coffee or something. Also, ask around. I've done recs for friends of friends that I didn't even know.

[Anonymous]

I was a 1st gen rushee in a sorority in the 90s….
Now I’m being asked for Rec letters by ppl I know in my circle for my friends’ daughters. It all comes full circle and does become more diverse.

Having said that - it’s so school dependent that broad generalizations generally are not helpful.

SEC school sororities would be a no for me under all circumstances. But that’s just me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was a first gen student. I had zero interest in joining a sorority. Nobody in my social group growing up had any experience with them, so it was not on my radar.

Moving forward, my daughter is rushing this week. We are supporting her, a little reluctantly though. All the girls she has met her first semester are also rushing. Her school does not ask for recommendation letters from previous members, thank God, because we really don’t have those connections.

My question is, how disadvantaged is a first gen student who is rushing at one of the schools where they still ask for rec letters? Is that system in place to continue keeping the “poors” out of the greek system? Also, don’t get me started on how expensive some of those soroties cost. Just another reason why they are so out of reach for most first gen students.

Your daughter is not first gen. You were.

This post smells weird.

I am the OP. I never said my daughter was first gen. I was asking how do first gen students get rec letters at schools where these are mandatory? My daughter attends a school where rec letters are not required.

You contact the sorority's local chapter where you live and ask if they'd be willing to connect you with someone who can write a letter. Many are willing to do it but may want to meet for coffee or something. Also, ask around. I've done recs for friends of friends that I didn't even know.

I meant to say local alumnae chapter

[Anonymous]

I wrote a rec letter for someone last year and it made me realize, I think a big driver behind wanting rec letters is to maintain alumni support. In order to submit the rec, I had to be a member of the sorority website and was then promptly asked to donate. I felt like I needed to donate so the girl I was recommending wasn’t at a disadvantage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was a 1st gen rushee in a sorority in the 90s….
Now I’m being asked for Rec letters by ppl I know in my circle for my friends’ daughters. It all comes full circle and does become more diverse.

Having said that - it’s so school dependent that broad generalizations generally are not helpful.

SEC school sororities would be a no for me under all circumstances. But that’s just me.

Sad, because it’s the best Greek life in the country.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do not drop before initiation and think you’re going to go through rush again the next year successfully. Would never happen.

If you rush a house, pledge, go through the process, and then drop before initiation, you’re not getting another house the next year. Former rush counselor here.

[Anonymous]

Agree, maybe this happened in the 90s and in the 80s but this isn’t happening in today’s current environment. Not to mention what a crappy thing to do is to take a space from someone else then decide that you don’t like it. Not a good look. SEC, top sorority, graduated within last five years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was a first gen student. I had zero interest in joining a sorority. Nobody in my social group growing up had any experience with them, so it was not on my radar.

Moving forward, my daughter is rushing this week. We are supporting her, a little reluctantly though. All the girls she has met her first semester are also rushing. Her school does not ask for recommendation letters from previous members, thank God, because we really don’t have those connections.

My question is, how disadvantaged is a first gen student who is rushing at one of the schools where they still ask for rec letters? Is that system in place to continue keeping the “poors” out of the greek system? Also, don’t get me started on how expensive some of those soroties cost. Just another reason why they are so out of reach for most first gen students.

Depends on the school. There's another thread about SMU rush right now that caught my eye because I grew up walking distance from SMU's campus (but did not go to school there); the system there is not so much about "keeping the 'poors' out" so much as keeping the people of a certain class and culture in -- which effectively keeps everyone else out. My DH who is from here (FFX) saw a picture of my niece with her sorority friends posing in identical outfits and they all had cowboy boots on and he asked me if wearing cowboy boots is a real thing in Texas. I laughed, and told him it is, but that isn't why they all have those boots -- I'd bet a lot of money that all of those girls have those boots because they ride in them, and have been riding at one of Texas's sorority feeder summer camps for years (sorority-feeder camps are a thing in TX). So it's not just "We're Texas girls, we wear expensive cowboy boots." It's "We're Texas girls who have been to the right summer camps where we wore these boots as we learned to ride and care for horses because it's a thing here that people of our class do." It's not just about money, it's about shared lived experiences (that most people cannot afford, and that some people who can afford are clueless about).

Some schools are not like this, and have at least some houses that embrace diversity and first gen students.

You’re way over thinking the boots. Plus, the boots that you ride in, are not the type of boots that you’d wear any time other than riding.

- A former Mystic camper/UT sorority girl with a sister/cousin and many friends who were in sororities at SMU and went to Mystic or Waldemar

+1. I’ve been to a SMU football game in the past year, and about 80% of the girls were wearing “cowboy” boots with cute dresses. However, these boots had never seen a horse (think tall white boots, like the ones you see on Instagram posts of girls attending bachelor parties in Nashville).

The whole Park Cities/Waldemar connection to SMU sororities is a thing, but much less influential than it used to be. Theta was kicked off campus last year, and it seems like 70% of the girls going out for rush are from California these days. It has made rush harder, since there’s one less sorority, but they are colonizing a couple of new ones, I think, and it will be interesting to see where the sorority scene ends up.

I think the school isn’t actively trying to get rid of Greek life, but they also aren’t cutting any of the houses any slack when they break the rules. There have been so many frats thrown out that the number of guys in frats has dropped and it’s really not as big a deal for boys (at least not like it used to be)

This is a little off topic, but I'm from Nashville, grew up there. Cowboy boots were NEVER a thing in Nashville--it's not the west for God's sake. Maybe some of the old country stars wore them, but they weren't Nashvilleans. Certainly not the UC/UMC of Nashville. I grew up riding with the Hillsboro Hounds, eventing at Percy Warner park, etc. Reese Witherspoon was a few years behind me in school--she's a typical UC/UMC Nashville girl.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was a first gen student. I had zero interest in joining a sorority. Nobody in my social group growing up had any experience with them, so it was not on my radar.

Moving forward, my daughter is rushing this week. We are supporting her, a little reluctantly though. All the girls she has met her first semester are also rushing. Her school does not ask for recommendation letters from previous members, thank God, because we really don’t have those connections.

My question is, how disadvantaged is a first gen student who is rushing at one of the schools where they still ask for rec letters? Is that system in place to continue keeping the “poors” out of the greek system? Also, don’t get me started on how expensive some of those soroties cost. Just another reason why they are so out of reach for most first gen students.

Depends on the school. There's another thread about SMU rush right now that caught my eye because I grew up walking distance from SMU's campus (but did not go to school there); the system there is not so much about "keeping the 'poors' out" so much as keeping the people of a certain class and culture in -- which effectively keeps everyone else out. My DH who is from here (FFX) saw a picture of my niece with her sorority friends posing in identical outfits and they all had cowboy boots on and he asked me if wearing cowboy boots is a real thing in Texas. I laughed, and told him it is, but that isn't why they all have those boots -- I'd bet a lot of money that all of those girls have those boots because they ride in them, and have been riding at one of Texas's sorority feeder summer camps for years (sorority-feeder camps are a thing in TX). So it's not just "We're Texas girls, we wear expensive cowboy boots." It's "We're Texas girls who have been to the right summer camps where we wore these boots as we learned to ride and care for horses because it's a thing here that people of our class do." It's not just about money, it's about shared lived experiences (that most people cannot afford, and that some people who can afford are clueless about).

Some schools are not like this, and have at least some houses that embrace diversity and first gen students.

You’re way over thinking the boots. Plus, the boots that you ride in, are not the type of boots that you’d wear any time other than riding.

- A former Mystic camper/UT sorority girl with a sister/cousin and many friends who were in sororities at SMU and went to Mystic or Waldemar

+1. I’ve been to a SMU football game in the past year, and about 80% of the girls were wearing “cowboy” boots with cute dresses. However, these boots had never seen a horse (think tall white boots, like the ones you see on Instagram posts of girls attending bachelor parties in Nashville).

The whole Park Cities/Waldemar connection to SMU sororities is a thing, but much less influential than it used to be. Theta was kicked off campus last year, and it seems like 70% of the girls going out for rush are from California these days. It has made rush harder, since there’s one less sorority, but they are colonizing a couple of new ones, I think, and it will be interesting to see where the sorority scene ends up.

I think the school isn’t actively trying to get rid of Greek life, but they also aren’t cutting any of the houses any slack when they break the rules. There have been so many frats thrown out that the number of guys in frats has dropped and it’s really not as big a deal for boys (at least not like it used to be)

This is a little off topic, but I'm from Nashville, grew up there. Cowboy boots were NEVER a thing in Nashville--it's not the west for God's sake. Maybe some of the old country stars wore them, but they weren't Nashvilleans. Certainly not the UC/UMC of Nashville. I grew up riding with the Hillsboro Hounds, eventing at Percy Warner park, etc. Reese Witherspoon was a few years behind me in school--she's a typical UC/UMC Nashville girl.

Well, based on the number of boot stores lining Broadway, they’re certainly a thing now. love Reese

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was a first gen student. I had zero interest in joining a sorority. Nobody in my social group growing up had any experience with them, so it was not on my radar.

Moving forward, my daughter is rushing this week. We are supporting her, a little reluctantly though. All the girls she has met her first semester are also rushing. Her school does not ask for recommendation letters from previous members, thank God, because we really don’t have those connections.

My question is, how disadvantaged is a first gen student who is rushing at one of the schools where they still ask for rec letters? Is that system in place to continue keeping the “poors” out of the greek system? Also, don’t get me started on how expensive some of those soroties cost. Just another reason why they are so out of reach for most first gen students.

Your daughter is not first gen. You were.

This post smells weird.

I am the OP. I never said my daughter was first gen. I was asking how do first gen students get rec letters at schools where these are mandatory? My daughter attends a school where rec letters are not required.

You contact the sorority's local chapter where you live and ask if they'd be willing to connect you with someone who can write a letter. Many are willing to do it but may want to meet for coffee or something. Also, ask around. I've done recs for friends of friends that I didn't even know.

Which really just shows how useless they are.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was a 1st gen rushee in a sorority in the 90s….
Now I’m being asked for Rec letters by ppl I know in my circle for my friends’ daughters. It all comes full circle and does become more diverse.

Having said that - it’s so school dependent that broad generalizations generally are not helpful.

SEC school sororities would be a no for me under all circumstances. But that’s just me.

Ickkk

Sad, because it’s the best Greek life in the country.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was a first gen student. I had zero interest in joining a sorority. Nobody in my social group growing up had any experience with them, so it was not on my radar.

Moving forward, my daughter is rushing this week. We are supporting her, a little reluctantly though. All the girls she has met her first semester are also rushing. Her school does not ask for recommendation letters from previous members, thank God, because we really don’t have those connections.

My question is, how disadvantaged is a first gen student who is rushing at one of the schools where they still ask for rec letters? Is that system in place to continue keeping the “poors” out of the greek system? Also, don’t get me started on how expensive some of those soroties cost. Just another reason why they are so out of reach for most first gen students.

Depends on the school. There's another thread about SMU rush right now that caught my eye because I grew up walking distance from SMU's campus (but did not go to school there); the system there is not so much about "keeping the 'poors' out" so much as keeping the people of a certain class and culture in -- which effectively keeps everyone else out. My DH who is from here (FFX) saw a picture of my niece with her sorority friends posing in identical outfits and they all had cowboy boots on and he asked me if wearing cowboy boots is a real thing in Texas. I laughed, and told him it is, but that isn't why they all have those boots -- I'd bet a lot of money that all of those girls have those boots because they ride in them, and have been riding at one of Texas's sorority feeder summer camps for years (sorority-feeder camps are a thing in TX). So it's not just "We're Texas girls, we wear expensive cowboy boots." It's "We're Texas girls who have been to the right summer camps where we wore these boots as we learned to ride and care for horses because it's a thing here that people of our class do." It's not just about money, it's about shared lived experiences (that most people cannot afford, and that some people who can afford are clueless about).

Some schools are not like this, and have at least some houses that embrace diversity and first gen students.

You’re way over thinking the boots. Plus, the boots that you ride in, are not the type of boots that you’d wear any time other than riding.

- A former Mystic camper/UT sorority girl with a sister/cousin and many friends who were in sororities at SMU and went to Mystic or Waldemar

+1. I’ve been to a SMU football game in the past year, and about 80% of the girls were wearing “cowboy” boots with cute dresses. However, these boots had never seen a horse (think tall white boots, like the ones you see on Instagram posts of girls attending bachelor parties in Nashville).

The whole Park Cities/Waldemar connection to SMU sororities is a thing, but much less influential than it used to be. Theta was kicked off campus last year, and it seems like 70% of the girls going out for rush are from California these days. It has made rush harder, since there’s one less sorority, but they are colonizing a couple of new ones, I think, and it will be interesting to see where the sorority scene ends up.

I think the school isn’t actively trying to get rid of Greek life, but they also aren’t cutting any of the houses any slack when they break the rules. There have been so many frats thrown out that the number of guys in frats has dropped and it’s really not as big a deal for boys (at least not like it used to be)

This is a little off topic, but I'm from Nashville, grew up there. Cowboy boots were NEVER a thing in Nashville--it's not the west for God's sake. Maybe some of the old country stars wore them, but they weren't Nashvilleans. Certainly not the UC/UMC of Nashville. I grew up riding with the Hillsboro Hounds, eventing at Percy Warner park, etc. Reese Witherspoon was a few years behind me in school--she's a typical UC/UMC Nashville girl.

Well, based on the number of boot stores lining Broadway, they’re certainly a thing now. love Reese

True, and it's very funny to me (and my friends that still live there). That whole area on lower Broadway? Used to be full of prostitutes and very unsafe. East Nashville? Not without a police escort. Definitely different now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was a first gen student. I had zero interest in joining a sorority. Nobody in my social group growing up had any experience with them, so it was not on my radar.

Moving forward, my daughter is rushing this week. We are supporting her, a little reluctantly though. All the girls she has met her first semester are also rushing. Her school does not ask for recommendation letters from previous members, thank God, because we really don’t have those connections.

My question is, how disadvantaged is a first gen student who is rushing at one of the schools where they still ask for rec letters? Is that system in place to continue keeping the “poors” out of the greek system? Also, don’t get me started on how expensive some of those soroties cost. Just another reason why they are so out of reach for most first gen students.

Your daughter is not first gen. You were.

This post smells weird.

I am the OP. I never said my daughter was first gen. I was asking how do first gen students get rec letters at schools where these are mandatory? My daughter attends a school where rec letters are not required.

You contact the sorority's local chapter where you live and ask if they'd be willing to connect you with someone who can write a letter. Many are willing to do it but may want to meet for coffee or something. Also, ask around. I've done recs for friends of friends that I didn't even know.

Which really just shows how useless they are.

Agreed, which is why I did them tbh. I don't think 18 year olds should have to go through the stress of finding them and be shut out of a house if they don't. So, anybody and everybody can have a rec from me!

[Anonymous]

I thought you pretty much had to have an "in" with girl(s) already in the house in order to have a real chance at joining a "top" sorority and that those sororities already know who they're going to invite before rush even begins.