Why would a man get married in 2023?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As a happily married man I will not encourage any man to be married. Just because I am happily married does not mean I am
Getting a * good deal* like women claim. They always bring up the same set of things that they do us. Here is the deal it’s just not true. Yes our mothers offered all those perks to our dads. Our wives are not. And I am glad they are not because we should be contributing equally to everything. But women today (and in a way I feel bad) are under immense pressure from society (or maybe feminists ) to seek their own happiness (which is good) and men as a result are under a microscope.

I did everything on that list every week except meals and those we ordered from a company. I also taught the kids and earned half the money. I don't understand what men want women to be these days. Women are doing most of the working in the US now and the childrearing. What exactly do men bring to the table comparatively if and I repeat if they aren't making more than the median income? The median income is about $150k around here I believe. What does a guy making say $100k bring to a marriage compared to a woman making the same?

[Anonymous]

Honestly, some of the responses on here are ridiculous. Don’t marry if you don’t want to but seems you are missing out on a wonderful, intimate relationship.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The better question is why would a woman get married? My two daughters don’t see the benefit.

That's what I'm thinking too. I'm 45, divorced with two kids, and very well off financially. I love having my space to myself and my kids (they are with their dad 50% of the time). Not sure what marriage would help me with?

You basically proved OP's point. You care only about yourself and your kids. No wonder you're divorced.

[Anonymous]

Marriage is generally a worse deal for women these days- especially if middle class and especially if there are kids. Women are expected to both work FT yet still do the majority of childcare and management of the home/family. Families who make more $$$ can afford to hire more assistance which helps this a lot. But usually not nearly enough to make things “equal”.

Marriage is also riskier for women because men are simply….riskier. Look at all the posts about DHs going totally off the rails- alcoholism, abuse, untreated mental illness, bad midlife crisis, or just doing absolutely zero with the kids/house for years on end etc. Women are far less likely to let things get that bad. They can go through some real sh!t yet usually find a way to keep themselves fairly together for the kids’ sake- at the very least.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a happily married man I will not encourage any man to be married. Just because I am happily married does not mean I am
Getting a * good deal* like women claim. They always bring up the same set of things that they do us. Here is the deal it’s just not true. Yes our mothers offered all those perks to our dads. Our wives are not. And I am glad they are not because we should be contributing equally to everything. But women today (and in a way I feel bad) are under immense pressure from society (or maybe feminists ) to seek their own happiness (which is good) and men as a result are under a microscope.

I did everything on that list every week except meals and those we ordered from a company. I also taught the kids and earned half the money. I don't understand what men want women to be these days. Women are doing most of the working in the US now and the childrearing. What exactly do men bring to the table comparatively if and I repeat if they aren't making more than the median income? The median income is about $150k around here I believe. What does a guy making say $100k bring to a marriage compared to a woman making the same?

This actually isn't true. Reputable studies show that in married couples, men do more work overall when taking into account work outside and inside the home. Look up the Pew studies on working. Women work more hours on average in the home, which is why it seems to women that they do more work--because they don't see the greater amount of work being done by men outside of the house. Of course, this is just averages, and I'm sure we'll get lots of anecdotal responses here from women who swear they do so much more than their husbands.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Marriage is generally a worse deal for women these days- especially if middle class and especially if there are kids. Women are expected to both work FT yet still do the majority of childcare and management of the home/family. Families who make more $$$ can afford to hire more assistance which helps this a lot. But usually not nearly enough to make things “equal”.

Marriage is also riskier for women because men are simply….riskier. Look at all the posts about DHs going totally off the rails- alcoholism, abuse, untreated mental illness, bad midlife crisis, or just doing absolutely zero with the kids/house for years on end etc. Women are far less likely to let things get that bad. They can go through some real sh!t yet usually find a way to keep themselves fairly together for the kids’ sake- at the very least.

Why then are there so many posts on here about women wanting men to settle down and get married? Is it that unmarried women somehow haven't gotten the message? Is it that women are unable to think rationally? It seems to me that there is no shortage of MC/UMC women who are desperate to get married. It is rarely a man who is desperate to lock down a woman in marriage, which is what you'd expect if it was such a great deal for men.

[Anonymous]

Marriage is overrated!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Marriage is generally a worse deal for women these days- especially if middle class and especially if there are kids. Women are expected to both work FT yet still do the majority of childcare and management of the home/family. Families who make more $$$ can afford to hire more assistance which helps this a lot. But usually not nearly enough to make things “equal”.

Marriage is also riskier for women because men are simply….riskier. Look at all the posts about DHs going totally off the rails- alcoholism, abuse, untreated mental illness, bad midlife crisis, or just doing absolutely zero with the kids/house for years on end etc. Women are far less likely to let things get that bad. They can go through some real sh!t yet usually find a way to keep themselves fairly together for the kids’ sake- at the very least.

Why then are there so many posts on here about women wanting men to settle down and get married? Is it that unmarried women somehow haven't gotten the message? Is it that women are unable to think rationally? It seems to me that there is no shortage of MC/UMC women who are desperate to get married. It is rarely a man who is desperate to lock down a woman in marriage, which is what you'd expect if it was such a great deal for men.

Because they want kids (and before they too old to do so). Fewer men care about this.

Every woman thinks she will get “one of the good ones” but there simply are not enough to go around.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:[b]The better question is why would a woman get married?[/b] My two daughters don’t see the benefit.

Why would any woman or man get married? Answer - Not to live in sin

What century are you writing from? It’s 2023.

A sin is a sin, regardless of the year or the century

Dislodge the stick, MeeMaw. No one cares what YOUR religion dictates.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:[b]The better question is why would a woman get married?[/b] My two daughters don’t see the benefit.

Why would any woman or man get married? Answer - Not to live in sin

Living in sin was fantastic!

Maybe fantastic in this life, but there is a day of judgement and hereafter

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:[b]The better question is why would a woman get married?[/b] My two daughters don’t see the benefit.

Why would any woman or man get married? Answer - Not to live in sin

What century are you writing from? It’s 2023.

A sin is a sin, regardless of the year or the century

It’s a “sin” only to old timey people who believe in supernatural hocus pocus.

If you think there is no creator and something can be created out of nothing, you have bigger problems

Take your proselytizing BS to the Religion board. Here, the adults are talking.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:way worse deal for women and I am married to a man who does a lot, including all the grocery shopping and cooking every night. But women are always stuck with the unquantifiable chores and lift of all the mental drain of parenting. Christmas is about to break me, every single gift purchased and wrapped by me, the xmas card, all the other things like teacher gifts, extended family coordination. I work too. He has no idea he has a persnal assistant, event planner and joy creater living with him and the kids

I’m a woman in the same boat, but I recognize that most men do not care about anything but the basics! They don’t value Christmas decorations, wrapped gifts, cards, matching pajamas, etc. etc. And they kind of have a point. We as women often go overboard, stress ourselves out, and get resentful we’re taken for granted when in reality both husband and kids would be very happy with more paired down celebratory periods and family/friend focused quality time.

I remember as a kid growing up just wishing my mom would pay attention to me when she was so focused decorating the house to the 9’s.

[Anonymous]

Women have a massive victim complex and don’t do 90% of the things they think they do.

My wife’s main household task is making lunch for 2 children and bedroom routine. Dishes, laundry, dinner/groceries, coordinating repairs/maintenance when needed, cleaning kitchen, and pretty much everything else falls to me.

But if you ask her, I do nothing. It’s pathological.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The better question is why would a woman get married? My two daughters don’t see the benefit.

+1. My daughter feels the same way - no benefit to marriage. Even worse - she sees that women still do (even at her age) the lion's share of childcare, negatively affecting her career and income prospects. I doubt she will ever have kids unless, perhaps, she does it while she lives in a European country that provides universal health care, universal maternity leave and early childhood care.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Lol even my DH knows that he'd be screwed without me (though not literally). Marriage is such a good deal for men.

Sorry to tell you this but to men, women are interchangeable and replaceable. Ask any divorced or widowed man who remarried. Yes I’m sure your husband probably loves you very much and all that, but please don’t delude yourself to thinking he can’t live without you specifically, because he sure can.