What do you do when your kids pursue their passions and are now broke as adults?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Money is not everything. There are a lot of miserable well paid people in the DMV who work in soul sucking jobs. They have traded their dreams for financial security. That's a heavy price.

There's a balance. Money isn't everything, but you need money to survive. Even if you have somewhat wealthy parents who can support you, what happens to your kids when the grandparents money is all gone by the time they reach their adulthood?

Teach your kid to fish.

Know so many stories here, including DS' ex GF. New England money that was finally gone in her childhood. Nearly homeless in HS, exacerbated by divorce, until someone allowed the mom, GF, and sibling to move into a basement.

And others where the DCs didn't realize that their parents' bougie lives were underwritten by family money and now complaining about the crap houses they can't even afford in Bethesda.

IMO, parents who have a bit of family money, and let their kids think there will always be family money they and their children can live off of do their children a disservice. We are not talking about the uber wealthy, like the Bezos or Buffets, but the UMC to somewhat wealthy. Even so, neither Bezos nor Buffet are leaving everything to their children, and want their kids to learn to stand on their own.

If your kid is fine with struggling while pursuing their passion, at least inform them of the realities of life. Otherwise, you are doing your child a huge disservice.

Buffet's grand daughter had to go on welfare because he won't help out. Seems like there should be some way to "fine" a $100BN+ person that they have to at least reimburse the government for welfare.

Should your grandfather's debt be passed on to you? That's essentially what you are saying, only in the reverse, that the grandfather should take on the debt of the grandchild.

The grand daughter clearly didn't learn to fish.

Nah...just that it seems wrong for taxpayers to support someone whose grandfather has $100BN+.

i get that it is unrealistic and unenforceable, but still seems shameful that he won't provide her even a nickel.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Money is not everything. There are a lot of miserable well paid people in the DMV who work in soul sucking jobs. They have traded their dreams for financial security. That's a heavy price.

There's a balance. Money isn't everything, but you need money to survive. Even if you have somewhat wealthy parents who can support you, what happens to your kids when the grandparents money is all gone by the time they reach their adulthood?

Teach your kid to fish.

Know so many stories here, including DS' ex GF. New England money that was finally gone in her childhood. Nearly homeless in HS, exacerbated by divorce, until someone allowed the mom, GF, and sibling to move into a basement.

And others where the DCs didn't realize that their parents' bougie lives were underwritten by family money and now complaining about the crap houses they can't even afford in Bethesda.

IMO, parents who have a bit of family money, and let their kids think there will always be family money they and their children can live off of do their children a disservice. We are not talking about the uber wealthy, like the Bezos or Buffets, but the UMC to somewhat wealthy. Even so, neither Bezos nor Buffet are leaving everything to their children, and want their kids to learn to stand on their own.

If your kid is fine with struggling while pursuing their passion, at least inform them of the realities of life. Otherwise, you are doing your child a huge disservice.

Buffet's grand daughter had to go on welfare because he won't help out. Seems like there should be some way to "fine" a $100BN+ person that they have to at least reimburse the government for welfare.

Should your grandfather's debt be passed on to you? That's essentially what you are saying, only in the reverse, that the grandfather should take on the debt of the grandchild.

The grand daughter clearly didn't learn to fish.

Nah...just that it seems wrong for taxpayers to support someone whose grandfather has $100BN+.

i get that it is unrealistic and unenforceable, but still seems shameful that he won't provide her even a nickel.

She will never learn if he keeps bailing her out. That's the point. I don't blame him. He does pay taxes, though.

Also, she flaunted her wealthy background, which he was not happy about.

https://finance.yahoo.com/news/warren-buffett-cut-off-granddaughter-152900004.html

Buffett has been an advocate for people carving out their own paths and achieving success through their merits. He has often stated that his children and grandchildren should not expect to inherit his vast fortune, emphasizing the importance of self-reliance and personal development.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Money is not everything. There are a lot of miserable well paid people in the DMV who work in soul sucking jobs. They have traded their dreams for financial security. That's a heavy price.

There's a balance. Money isn't everything, but you need money to survive. Even if you have somewhat wealthy parents who can support you, what happens to your kids when the grandparents money is all gone by the time they reach their adulthood?

Teach your kid to fish.

Know so many stories here, including DS' ex GF. New England money that was finally gone in her childhood. Nearly homeless in HS, exacerbated by divorce, until someone allowed the mom, GF, and sibling to move into a basement.

And others where the DCs didn't realize that their parents' bougie lives were underwritten by family money and now complaining about the crap houses they can't even afford in Bethesda.

IMO, parents who have a bit of family money, and let their kids think there will always be family money they and their children can live off of do their children a disservice. We are not talking about the uber wealthy, like the Bezos or Buffets, but the UMC to somewhat wealthy. Even so, neither Bezos nor Buffet are leaving everything to their children, and want their kids to learn to stand on their own.

If your kid is fine with struggling while pursuing their passion, at least inform them of the realities of life. Otherwise, you are doing your child a huge disservice.

Buffet's grand daughter had to go on welfare because he won't help out. Seems like there should be some way to "fine" a $100BN+ person that they have to at least reimburse the government for welfare.

Should your grandfather's debt be passed on to you? That's essentially what you are saying, only in the reverse, that the grandfather should take on the debt of the grandchild.

The grand daughter clearly didn't learn to fish.

Nah...just that it seems wrong for taxpayers to support someone whose grandfather has $100BN+.

i get that it is unrealistic and unenforceable, but still seems shameful that he won't provide her even a nickel.

She will never learn if he keeps bailing her out. That's the point. I don't blame him. He does pay taxes, though.

Also, she flaunted her wealthy background, which he was not happy about.

https://finance.yahoo.com/news/warren-buffett-cut-off-granddaughter-152900004.html

Buffett has been an advocate for people carving out their own paths and achieving success through their merits. He has often stated that his children and grandchildren should not expect to inherit his vast fortune, emphasizing the importance of self-reliance and personal development.

It's his money. Period. No one is entitled to it.

Your kids can pursue their passions, but they need to be absolutely clear-eyed about it.

[Anonymous]

I think it’s okay when they are young, but when they are older and don’t have the comforts of middle age (house, family, retirement income) they might become bitter and resentful. I think “passion” is oversold in this country. Work a day job and have your passion on the weekends.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think it’s okay when they are young, but when they are older and don’t have the comforts of middle age (house, family, retirement income) they might become bitter and resentful. I think “passion” is oversold in this country. Work a day job and have your passion on the weekends.

But you'll never be as good as someone who dedicates themselves full-time to your passion. If you're okay with that, then the day job to pay the bills is the right way to go.

In most cases, talent and passion take root at an early age (particularly in athletics), but there are those who are extremely successful as a "2nd Act". https://www.forbes.com/second-acts/#1fc4db454618

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it’s okay when they are young, but when they are older and don’t have the comforts of middle age (house, family, retirement income) they might become bitter and resentful. I think “passion” is oversold in this country. Work a day job and have your passion on the weekends.

But you'll never be as good as someone who dedicates themselves full-time to your passion. If you're okay with that, then the day job to pay the bills is the right way to go.

In most cases, talent and passion take root at an early age (particularly in athletics), but there are those who are extremely successful as a "2nd Act". https://www.forbes.com/second-acts/#1fc4db454618

This is a “3rd way”…the folks profiled here made substantial $$$$s and then pursued their passion…I assume the thinking was I will risk a small %age of my net worth pursuing and if it doesn’t work out, my lifestyle won’t really change.

Interestingly…the one woman who was a former Victoria’s Secret model is interesting because I gather you could say that pursuing modeling was a passion project. I would imagine there are many models that barely survive each year like any everyday actor, and only a very small %age make substantial $$$s.

John Legend is perhaps one of the few examples of an artist that had a real day job (BCG consultant) but also worked his butt off to make it in music. It’s hard to keep your eye on the prize when you start enjoying the trappings of the day job.

[Anonymous]

The guy I knew went back to school to get his RN.