Left-out Groomsman? Or just not told yet I'm in wedding?

[Anonymous]

You sound like a great friend, OP. I’m sorry he didn’t ask you but I hope you get to go to the wedding and have fun.

[Anonymous]

Op, I feel like that was not cool, especially since he had mentioned it to you, but at least you have clarity. I hope it’s a fun wedding… also, this is just me but we didn’t do bridesmaids/groomsmen and most of my friends didn’t either—some of the college ones who got married young did, but years later most of them are not particularly close to at least a few of the people they chose at the time… friendships ebb and flow and change and weddings often surface stuff you didn’t know about people , family etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP - I called the groom today. I didn't bring it up but he actually then did bring this subject up at the end of the call. Basically what others have said here is that he wanted to go with some older friends, and people closer to home in Seattle. (He's actually going to have 8 bridesmaids and 8 groomsman.) I'm glad to have the information. I'm also autistic so I have difficulty gauging people. In this case I do know he had asked me prior to the engagement, so that is why I was confused because I like to have a reason for things and certainty. But I let this one drop. His choice, his day. Thanks everyone for the help on this one.

You just saved yourself airfare and know where you stand.
Send a nice card and moderate gift.
Treat yourself with the difference.