SWS - You are only invited if you’re Black

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: The announcement doesn't say anything about white people not being invited (unless I missed it?). It says the talks plan on focusing on a certain group. Anybody is welcome to come and participate as long as they are on topic.

Correct, it doesn't.

It does. It doesn’t say “whites are NOT invited”, but it says they are excited to invite “all families of children who identify as black.” If your child doesn’t identify as Black, you are not invited.

I honestly don't view this as anything different than having such an email for any other specialty group from parents of LGBTQ+ kids to parents of kids with special needs. Literally just don't care.

Most of the time those aren’t phrased in an exclusionary way, though.

Assuming this is legal, people are free to issue exclusionary invitations. But what they aren’t free to do is control other people’s reactions to being excluded, or be surprised when people react badly.

Email was rewritten in an earlier comment replacing Black with LGBTQ+ and it reads perfectly fine

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: The announcement doesn't say anything about white people not being invited (unless I missed it?). It says the talks plan on focusing on a certain group. Anybody is welcome to come and participate as long as they are on topic.

Correct, it doesn't.

It does. It doesn’t say “whites are NOT invited”, but it says they are excited to invite “all families of children who identify as black.” If your child doesn’t identify as Black, you are not invited.

It obviously makes clear that white people aren't invited. If it didn't do that, I don't think it would even be controversial. That said, I don't think it's a problem, but I do think they should emphasize that it's unofficial and parent-organized. If that IDEA Committee is an official thing that has school funding/admin participation, then I think it gets much more problematic... especially if there are no such meetings for other marginalized groups. Like, honeslty, I think it's a lot harder to be AA than White at SWS, but it's harder still to be latinx because the community is tiny and the school doesn't constantly celebrate your history.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: The announcement doesn't say anything about white people not being invited (unless I missed it?). It says the talks plan on focusing on a certain group. Anybody is welcome to come and participate as long as they are on topic.

Correct, it doesn't.

It does. It doesn’t say “whites are NOT invited”, but it says they are excited to invite “all families of children who identify as black.” If your child doesn’t identify as Black, you are not invited.

It obviously makes clear that white people aren't invited. If it didn't do that, I don't think it would even be controversial. That said, I don't think it's a problem, but I do think they should emphasize that it's unofficial and parent-organized. If that IDEA Committee is an official thing that has school funding/admin participation, then I think it gets much more problematic... especially if there are no such meetings for other marginalized groups. Like, honeslty, I think it's a lot harder to be AA than White at SWS, but it's harder still to be latinx because the community is tiny and the school doesn't constantly celebrate your history.

But people get more offended apparently whereas the same email with exact same text written as though it were, say, for parents of kids with dyslexia, would somehow be less offensive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This does sound strange, tbh. People who identify as Black and/or of African descent can be really different groups?? Do people of white South African descent count here?

Don’t be pedantic. They are being inclusive of mixed-race families whose children identify as Black.

I thought they were being inclusive of people who identify as African.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: The announcement doesn't say anything about white people not being invited (unless I missed it?). It says the talks plan on focusing on a certain group. Anybody is welcome to come and participate as long as they are on topic.

Correct, it doesn't.

It does. It doesn’t say “whites are NOT invited”, but it says they are excited to invite “all families of children who identify as black.” If your child doesn’t identify as Black, you are not invited.

It obviously makes clear that white people aren't invited. If it didn't do that, I don't think it would even be controversial. That said, I don't think it's a problem, but I do think they should emphasize that it's unofficial and parent-organized. If that IDEA Committee is an official thing that has school funding/admin participation, then I think it gets much more problematic... especially if there are no such meetings for other marginalized groups. Like, honeslty, I think it's a lot harder to be AA than White at SWS, but it's harder still to be latinx because the community is tiny and the school doesn't constantly celebrate your history.

But people get more offended apparently whereas the same email with exact same text written as though it were, say, for parents of kids with dyslexia, would somehow be less offensive.

parents of SN kids may have privacy concerns. I would probably organize a SN parent group privately (as any other parent could do for their affinity group).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So … I get it. Black families have concerns that other races do not face. But the constant drumbeat of only focusing on one race at SWS is so off putting. The latest email from the school:

Dear SWS families,
As a part of the Inclusion, Diversity, Equity, and Anti-Racism (IDEA) Committee's ongoing commitment to fostering a strong sense of community and inclusivity within our school, we are excited to invite all families of children who identify as Black and/or of African descent to the upcoming Black Family Social.

Date: Sunday, October 1
Time: 11AM-1PM
Location: Sherwood Playground (behind SWS)

This special event is designed to celebrate and embrace the rich tapestry of our school community, specifically focusing on families with children who identify as Black and/or of African descent. It's an opportunity to come together and to strengthen connections and support among those of us raising Black children.

The bold appears in the email, in case you thought you might be invited as a white, Asian or Hispanic person. How is this “fostering inclusivity”?

If this email was written exactly the same way but with "White and/or of European descent" would that be ok? Because it shouldn't be wrong for white families to be able to come together and strengthen connections and support among those raising white children.

[Anonymous]

I think one of the issues here is that this is a social event, and it's being promoted by the PTA, and it appears to exclude people not in that affinity group. These might seem like subtle issues, but if your focus is inclusion, it matters.

I used to work at a company that handled this issue really well. We had tons of affinity groups -- for women, for parents, for black people, AAPI, Native, LGBTQ+, etc. The company had a very well-publicized policy that if you wanted to start an affinity group based on anything as long as it was legal and didn't violate company policy, you could. So there were lots.

Affinity groups had events all the time, and often those events were just "for" people in the event. Especially if it was an event to talk about their experiences or to discuss challenges. No one felt excluded, because if you weren't in that group, it would be weird and awkward for you to go to an event where people discuss something very specific to them that you can't relate to. No frustrations.

But also the company often had celebratory social events that might focus on one of these groups -- a Pride happy hour, an event to celebrate women leaders at the company on International Women's Day, events celebrating black, AAPI, latino employees during times of the year that are meaningful to those groups. And the company would partner with the affinity groups to do these events, which ensured that the events were appropriate and appreciated by these groups. But everyone was invited, because it was a company-sponsored event.

So it was normal to get notices about, say, an affinity group holding monthly lunches for moms to discuss work-life issues, because a group of moms at the company wanted that and created the group. But if the company had a Mothers Day celebration, everyone in the company was welcome.

It's not that hard, when you think about it. It just requires asking what your goals are with any given initiative and making sure the program AND the messaging match that goal. I think SWS has failed on that here, personally.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: The announcement doesn't say anything about white people not being invited (unless I missed it?). It says the talks plan on focusing on a certain group. Anybody is welcome to come and participate as long as they are on topic.

Correct, it doesn't.

It does. It doesn’t say “whites are NOT invited”, but it says they are excited to invite “all families of children who identify as black.” If your child doesn’t identify as Black, you are not invited.

It obviously makes clear that white people aren't invited. If it didn't do that, I don't think it would even be controversial. That said, I don't think it's a problem, but I do think they should emphasize that it's unofficial and parent-organized. If that IDEA Committee is an official thing that has school funding/admin participation, then I think it gets much more problematic... especially if there are no such meetings for other marginalized groups. Like, honeslty, I think it's a lot harder to be AA than White at SWS, but it's harder still to be latinx because the community is tiny and the school doesn't constantly celebrate your history.

But people get more offended apparently whereas the same email with exact same text written as though it were, say, for parents of kids with dyslexia, would somehow be less offensive.

parents of SN kids may have privacy concerns. I would probably organize a SN parent group privately (as any other parent could do for their affinity group).

That's beside the point, which is that people are leas offended when you replace Black with (insert whatever other specialty group... single parents, working parent, whatever) in the exact same text of the email.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So … I get it. Black families have concerns that other races do not face. But the constant drumbeat of only focusing on one race at SWS is so off putting. The latest email from the school:

Dear SWS families,
As a part of the Inclusion, Diversity, Equity, and Anti-Racism (IDEA) Committee's ongoing commitment to fostering a strong sense of community and inclusivity within our school, we are excited to invite all families of children who identify as Black and/or of African descent to the upcoming Black Family Social.

Date: Sunday, October 1
Time: 11AM-1PM
Location: Sherwood Playground (behind SWS)

This special event is designed to celebrate and embrace the rich tapestry of our school community, specifically focusing on families with children who identify as Black and/or of African descent. It's an opportunity to come together and to strengthen connections and support among those of us raising Black children.

The bold appears in the email, in case you thought you might be invited as a white, Asian or Hispanic person. How is this “fostering inclusivity”?

If this email was written exactly the same way but with "White and/or of European descent" would that be ok? Because it shouldn't be wrong for white families to be able to come together and strengthen connections and support among those raising white children.

You know, Clarence, you might be onto something.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Genuine question - do you have the same gut emotional reaction if you replace Black with LGBTQ+ for the same email?

i.e., if it read:

...we are excited to invite all families of children who identify as LGBTQ+ to the upcoming LGBTQ+ Family Social.


This special event is designed to celebrate and embrace the rich tapestry of our school community, specifically focusing on families with children who identify as LGBTQ+. It's an opportunity to come together and to strengthen connections and support among those of us raising LGBTQ+ children.

DP. But yes I would. I would be fine if it was parents organizing but not a school funded initiative

Are you not ok with school groups for students who identify as a particular culture, religion, LGBTQ+, school groups for girls only then? Or which groups are you ok with and which ones not?

I actually am not ok with any school groups based on gender, race or sexuality with school funds. I don’t agree with girls on the run and don’t think it should be affiliated with schools. I think DCPS has so many academic deficiencies that all of the bandwidth should be used for that. Parent organized with their own money and not using any school funds? Great have at it.

I think if they are using HSA funds those projects they need to be very clear in fundraising emails so that parents can make informed choices about whether to donate their money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Genuine question - do you have the same gut emotional reaction if you replace Black with LGBTQ+ for the same email?

i.e., if it read:

...we are excited to invite all families of children who identify as LGBTQ+ to the upcoming LGBTQ+ Family Social.


This special event is designed to celebrate and embrace the rich tapestry of our school community, specifically focusing on families with children who identify as LGBTQ+. It's an opportunity to come together and to strengthen connections and support among those of us raising LGBTQ+ children.

DP. But yes I would. I would be fine if it was parents organizing but not a school funded initiative

Are you not ok with school groups for students who identify as a particular culture, religion, LGBTQ+, school groups for girls only then? Or which groups are you ok with and which ones not?

I actually am not ok with any school groups based on gender, race or sexuality with school funds. I don’t agree with girls on the run and don’t think it should be affiliated with schools. I think DCPS has so many academic deficiencies that all of the bandwidth should be used for that. Parent organized with their own money and not using any school funds? Great have at it.

I think if they are using HSA funds those projects they need to be very clear in fundraising emails so that parents can make informed choices about whether to donate their money.

....ok then you are opposed to all public schools with separate sports for gender? Boys soccer team vs girls soccer team?

Of note, the SWS committees are parent run, probably any funding provided by parent led fundraising group that is affiliated with the school (but separate funding then school public tax dollars, I think)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: The announcement doesn't say anything about white people not being invited (unless I missed it?). It says the talks plan on focusing on a certain group. Anybody is welcome to come and participate as long as they are on topic.

Correct, it doesn't.

It does. It doesn’t say “whites are NOT invited”, but it says they are excited to invite “all families of children who identify as black.” If your child doesn’t identify as Black, you are not invited.

It obviously makes clear that white people aren't invited. If it didn't do that, I don't think it would even be controversial. That said, I don't think it's a problem, but I do think they should emphasize that it's unofficial and parent-organized. If that IDEA Committee is an official thing that has school funding/admin participation, then I think it gets much more problematic... especially if there are no such meetings for other marginalized groups. Like, honeslty, I think it's a lot harder to be AA than White at SWS, but it's harder still to be latinx because the community is tiny and the school doesn't constantly celebrate your history.

But people get more offended apparently whereas the same email with exact same text written as though it were, say, for parents of kids with dyslexia, would somehow be less offensive.

parents of SN kids may have privacy concerns. I would probably organize a SN parent group privately (as any other parent could do for their affinity group).

That's beside the point, which is that people are leas offended when you replace Black with (insert whatever other specialty group... single parents, working parent, whatever) in the exact same text of the email.

Like if you replaced Black with White.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Genuine question - do you have the same gut emotional reaction if you replace Black with LGBTQ+ for the same email?

i.e., if it read:

...we are excited to invite all families of children who identify as LGBTQ+ to the upcoming LGBTQ+ Family Social.


This special event is designed to celebrate and embrace the rich tapestry of our school community, specifically focusing on families with children who identify as LGBTQ+. It's an opportunity to come together and to strengthen connections and support among those of us raising LGBTQ+ children.

DP. But yes I would. I would be fine if it was parents organizing but not a school funded initiative

Are you not ok with school groups for students who identify as a particular culture, religion, LGBTQ+, school groups for girls only then? Or which groups are you ok with and which ones not?

I actually am not ok with any school groups based on gender, race or sexuality with school funds. I don’t agree with girls on the run and don’t think it should be affiliated with schools. I think DCPS has so many academic deficiencies that all of the bandwidth should be used for that. Parent organized with their own money and not using any school funds? Great have at it.

I think if they are using HSA funds those projects they need to be very clear in fundraising emails so that parents can make informed choices about whether to donate their money.

....ok then you are opposed to all public schools with separate sports for gender? Boys soccer team vs girls soccer team?

Of note, the SWS committees are parent run, probably any funding provided by parent led fundraising group that is affiliated with the school (but separate funding then school public tax dollars, I think)

Correct. I am against all public schools with sports separated by gender. J-R crew team? Perfect example of how sports should be run in public schools.

SWS should be clear who is funding this. Like I said, if it’s the HSA/PTA they need to be completely upfront about where the money they raise is doing so that parents can make an informed decision about donating money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So … I get it. Black families have concerns that other races do not face. But the constant drumbeat of only focusing on one race at SWS is so off putting. The latest email from the school:

Dear SWS families,
As a part of the Inclusion, Diversity, Equity, and Anti-Racism (IDEA) Committee's ongoing commitment to fostering a strong sense of community and inclusivity within our school, we are excited to invite all families of children who identify as Black and/or of African descent to the upcoming Black Family Social.

Date: Sunday, October 1
Time: 11AM-1PM
Location: Sherwood Playground (behind SWS)

This special event is designed to celebrate and embrace the rich tapestry of our school community, specifically focusing on families with children who identify as Black and/or of African descent. It's an opportunity to come together and to strengthen connections and support among those of us raising Black children.

The bold appears in the email, in case you thought you might be invited as a white, Asian or Hispanic person. How is this “fostering inclusivity”?

If this email was written exactly the same way but with "White and/or of European descent" would that be ok? Because it shouldn't be wrong for white families to be able to come together and strengthen connections and support among those raising white children.

You know, Clarence, you might be onto something.

It’s a race thing and arguing about gender or disabilities or LGBTQ+ is beside the point.

The question is whether it is appropriate for a school event to exclude children based solely on race.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So … I get it. Black families have concerns that other races do not face. But the constant drumbeat of only focusing on one race at SWS is so off putting. The latest email from the school:

Dear SWS families,
As a part of the Inclusion, Diversity, Equity, and Anti-Racism (IDEA) Committee's ongoing commitment to fostering a strong sense of community and inclusivity within our school, we are excited to invite all families of children who identify as Black and/or of African descent to the upcoming Black Family Social.

Date: Sunday, October 1
Time: 11AM-1PM
Location: Sherwood Playground (behind SWS)

This special event is designed to celebrate and embrace the rich tapestry of our school community, specifically focusing on families with children who identify as Black and/or of African descent. It's an opportunity to come together and to strengthen connections and support among those of us raising Black children.

The bold appears in the email, in case you thought you might be invited as a white, Asian or Hispanic person. How is this “fostering inclusivity”?

If this email was written exactly the same way but with "White and/or of European descent" would that be ok? Because it shouldn't be wrong for white families to be able to come together and strengthen connections and support among those raising white children.

You know, Clarence, you might be onto something.

It’s a race thing and arguing about gender or disabilities or LGBTQ+ is beside the point.

The question is whether it is appropriate for a school event to exclude children based solely on race.

Absolutely not beside the point.

Do you believe Black families face unique issues and concerns with regard to their child's school experience just as any other (insert specialty group)?