Are sleepaway camps a good idea?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well.

https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/1119313.page

Well, what?

Not the PP, but all that thread shows me it is impossible to have a realistic and rational conversation with sleepaway camp fanatics. Are all sleepaway camps hotbeds of abuse? No, but many children are abused at camp every year and it's underreported.

I went to sleepaway camp every year as a kid. Yes, we absolutely had two male counselors who were inappropriate-they knew exactly how far to the line they could go and nothing was ever done. The 90s were a bad time to be a kid.

[Anonymous]

What “concrete benefit” are you looking for? Common sense indicates that for many kids, it helps with independence and all that. To be sure, some kids have meltdowns and can”t handle it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have no need to be rid of my kids during the summer.

My kids get to spend a relaxed summer with friends and family, some ECs and scholastic stuff and then also a bit of international travel thrown in.

They like to get up late, eat what they want to eat, watch movies, be indoors in AC when hot or go to the pool, and not follow a strict schedule most of the time.

My kid does all of that and goes away to camp for three weeks. It’s not either/or.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well.

https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/1119313.page

Well, what?

Not the PP, but all that thread shows me it is impossible to have a realistic and rational conversation with sleepaway camp fanatics. Are all sleepaway camps hotbeds of abuse? No, but many children are abused at camp every year and it's underreported.

Oh come on. It’s a very, very small percentage.

Saying you are not sending your kid to sleep away because of this, you are being way risk adverse outside the normal range. It’s like saying my kid is not getting in a car because I’m afraid they are going to get into an accident.

Have the talk with your kid about inappropriate actions and what to do.

Getting in a car is not optional.

Ok but it’s too bad to deprive your kid of a possibly formative experience because of your irrational fears.

You also don’t seem to have confidence in your kid to know what to do, especially if you have a discussion with them about it beforehand. That’s one of the big reasons for sleep away is to give your kid the experience of taking care of themselves, knowing what to do, and having the confidence to do it.

Helicoptering and protecting them from all potential risks of what ifs in the world, no matter how small of a risk it is, is not going to help your kid grow to be independent and confident adults.

Exactly. These parents are doing more harm to their kids by keeping them in some little bubble

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well.

https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/1119313.page

Well, what?

Not the PP, but all that thread shows me it is impossible to have a realistic and rational conversation with sleepaway camp fanatics. Are all sleepaway camps hotbeds of abuse? No, but many children are abused at camp every year and it's underreported.

I went to sleepaway camp every year as a kid. Yes, we absolutely had two male counselors who were inappropriate-they knew exactly how far to the line they could go and nothing was ever done. The 90s were a bad time to be a kid.

I went every year, too. Was never touched. See how this works?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It builds independence and resilience. I only went to one week of sleep away camp, the summer after 5th grade, but it was a big experience in my life and stayed with me for decades. My husband and I were talking about how camp leaves oversized memories for the amount of time we were actually there.

My 9yo went to her first week this year and she loved it. It was hard not being able to talk to her all week, but I think it is a valuable step in independence for a child.

Wow, that’s great to get that from …. one whole week. I went for eight weeks at 10, and was ready to leave (out of boredom) by the sixth week.

[Anonymous]

I went for 8 weeks a summer as a kid and loved it. During the middle school years it was really helpful for me to have a camp friend group separate from my school friends (most of my camp friends came from an area within a 3 hour drive so we would get together for b'day parties during the year).

My kids have been going for 4 weeks and love it. I also love that they are 100% away from screens for a month. They waterski, sail, rock climb, clean their bunks every day, play sports, wake up at midnight and have a pizza party (IYKYK). it is truly a magical time. I miss them and would love it if they were at home, but they have more fun at camp. One of my kids goes to a Jewish camp, which has its own benefits of being someplace where everyone is Jewish and they celebrate Shabbat with friends (vs their school where only 3-4 other kids in their grade are Jewish).

[Anonymous]

The fear about sex abuse is surprising to me. For the people worried about this, do your kids participate in sports, go to school, do scouting, go to church/temple? Those all seem just as high risk as sleepaway camp.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know some people who have begun sending 9-12 year olds to sleepaway camps. Are they a good idea? If you went, what were the benefits? I hate my kids to be away from me for an extended period of time, so I want to know if it’s any very concrete benefit you found.

For my children, yes. Both boys learned valuable lessons about independence, self-care, working with others. The camps they went to were digital-free zones, so, for my screenagers, this was a much-needed detox (that they welcomed) every year. My children are looking forward to going away to college - they aren't anxious at all about making new friends or being able to manage - because they've done it all before. They also gained skills they otherwise wouldn't have had - like sailing, archery, riflery, etc.

BUT, YMMV. Some kids are too anxious, have trouble adapting, or their parents don't want them far from home, so do what's best for your family.

[Anonymous]

Is this a Jewish thing the sleep away camps?

[Anonymous]

I did not enjoy them. I was very shy. Maybe insecure is a better word. Girl Guide camp would go OK because I knew the other people. My parents sent my brother and I to Bible camp, though, and I don't think I ever enjoyed it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is this a Jewish thing the sleep away camps?

No?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I did not enjoy them. I was very shy. Maybe insecure is a better word. Girl Guide camp would go OK because I knew the other people. My parents sent my brother and I to Bible camp, though, and I don't think I ever enjoyed it.

I think 4+ weeks of camp works better for shy kids because you have time to get to know people. With shorter camps, by the time the shy kids have opened up, it is time to go.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is this a Jewish thing the sleep away camps?

The way this question is worded is disconcerting, but putting that aside, as a Jewish person, I would say yes -- camp is a cultural thing among American Jews. That doesn't mean that others don't attend sleepaway camps or that all Jewish children attend sleepaway camps, but it's seen as a norm in many Jewish circles and highly promoted by Jewish organizations. It's seen as a chance to strengthen identity, be around other Jewish children, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is this a Jewish thing the sleep away camps?

No. It’s definitely more popular with east coast population though. Lots of kids from NY, DC, Boston, Connecticut go. These are the states most of the kids at my children’s non religious Maine sleepaway camp are from. Then a few from Maine and a sprinkle of kids from other various states across the US (usually with a parent or grandparent who attended) and a couple international. Many sleepaway camps have no religious affiliation.

There are dedicated Jewish sleepaway camps that are the entire summer. But to say it is a Jewish thing is absolutely incorrect