If someone got out of their car in traffic to confront you, what would you do?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Forgot above: Then call the police.

But, what if the other person is Black? Are you willing to get someone killed just because they got a little mad in traffic?

This. Absolutely this.

Put on your big girl panties and think of someone besides yourself. You can get a POC killed because you cut them off in traffic and they (rightfully) got mad at you.

Wow. I thought I'd heard it all hanging out on DCUM. Not even close....

[Anonymous]

When I was a teenager I tapped the horn at a man for not going on red. He was car #1, I was car #2. The crazy man jumped out and started yelling at me. People are nuts!

[Anonymous]

I go out of my way to avoid erratic drivers, drive as neutrally as possible, and disengage completely. Ultimately you never know what's going to anger someone else though - it could be the type of car you drive, you signaled too soon or too late, you're not driving fast enough, who knows. If someone confronted me like the OP I would do the exact same, gesture to my phone and say I would call 911 immediately.

I worry about my DH in these situations. He has gotten better over the years, but when someone cuts him off or is driving dangerously on the road, he always reacts (horn, gesture, brake check, etc.). I worry if someone confronted him he would engage, even if he had done nothing wrong. He finally got a dash cam and that seems to provide some peace of mind and temper his reactivity.

[Anonymous]

Run them over.

[Anonymous]

I pointed a pistol at a guy who did that and who also smacked the side of my car. He left.

If conditions permit, and they did not in my case, it's best to simply drive around them and leave them behind. It's one reason to never pull up too closely behind the vehicle in front of you, you want to have enough space to drive around to one side or the other if necessary.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Forgot above: Then call the police.

But, what if the other person is Black? Are you willing to get someone killed just because they got a little mad in traffic?

This. Absolutely this.

Put on your big girl panties and think of someone besides yourself. You can get a POC killed because you cut them off in traffic and they (rightfully) got mad at you.

There is a difference between getting mad (rightfully or not) and getting out of your car and yelling at someone in theirs. No matter a persons race they should put their big girl panties on and learn how to appropriately deal with anger.

[Anonymous]

I had a mom in Boston do this when I stopped on a pink light. Got out of an SUV in a tennis dress, kids in the vehicle to scream at me. Even pulled on the door, good policy to keep them locked. It was quite scary, she seemed utterly unhinged.

Glad you are ok, OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I merged in front of a car this morning, completely safely and appropriately. The person who was behind me in the lane apparently disagreed, gunned it to go around me and stop in front of me at a stop light, and jumped out of his car to yell at me. I just held my phone up and said I was going to call the cops. He got back in his car and was driving again when the light turned green.

Would you have done anything differently?

Very scary, OP.

It sounds like you did the right thing. If he had stuck around instead of driving off, I would have called 911 and then tried to leave the scene after photographing or remembering his license plate. No reason to stick around to find out if he's crazy AND has a gun.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Forgot above: Then call the police.

But, what if the other person is Black? Are you willing to get someone killed just because they got a little mad in traffic?

We all “get a little mad” in traffic. Maybe to the point of gesturing to or yelling at the other driver. Getting out of your car to intimidate someone is not “getting a little mad,” it is being deliberately combative and aggressive, and yes, you may get the cops called on you if you need to be Mr. Big making a big show of being aggressive. When I call the police, it is because I don’t feel safe, and I need help. It’s not up to me what kind of cop answers the call. Don’t want to take risks? Stay in your car.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This happened to me like 20 years ago. Someone was tailgating me so I hit my brakes. At the next light I saw it was some really angry scary looking black guy. Looked like not from the area. He followed us for like 15 minutes or something. At each intersection he'd get out of his car and try to run at our car. Eventually we parked right in front of the Walmart entrance, figuring with all the people milling around he would leave us alone. Nope, he went and parked then tried to sneak up on us. We gunned it out of there and into a nearby office park. We went inside a nearby office building and the security guard locked the door. We waited there for a while then left. I guess that's why I don't brake check people anymore. Never know if some psycho is tailgating you.

He was 100% in the wrong and crazy, but you should never have “brake checked” anyone. That’s an eff around and find out move, whether finding out the diver behind you is psycho, finding out they are not paying attention, or finding out that their car actually does have a brake problem or other mechanical problem. The stupid prize you won was disproportionate to your stupid behavior, but yes, play stupid games, win stupid prizes. Engaging in deliberately unsafe behavior to shame or stop someone else from engaging in unsafe behavior is not only stupid, it’s hypocritical. Eff around and find out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Forgot above: Then call the police.

But, what if the other person is Black? Are you willing to get someone killed just because they got a little mad in traffic?

This. Absolutely this.

Put on your big girl panties and think of someone besides yourself. You can get a POC killed because you cut them off in traffic and they (rightfully) got mad at you.

“Rightfully” getting mad at someone on the road is maybe yelling at someone or gesturing at someone. Getting out of your car is never an appropriate response to “getting mad.” At that point, you are not just showing justified anger, you are being deliberately aggressive and making someone else feel unsafe. Do so at your own risk, no matter the door of your skin. Don’t want the cops called on you? Stay in your car.

[Anonymous]

Watch the movie "Unhinged".

[Anonymous]

I would have just given him the Grey Poupon.

[Anonymous]

My rage story as a kid, literally 12 years old we were throwing snowballs. We tossed one at this guys car way off and hit it.

This nut slams on brakes goes sliding in snow spins around up back at us jumps out of car with a gun and goes after us. We run into traffic almost get hit by cars circle back and get on bikes.

Whatever. Like 10 minutes late we get nabbed by cops for throwing a snowball. I am like what. Getting taking to police station they call parents. I am thinking I am screwed.

My parents come and taking to cops and my very very strict father does not seem concerned I am on the interrogation room.

Next thing I know the angriest maddest pissed off women I ever see comes in to police station. She goes into a room and comes out dragging the guy with the gun out screaming at him. Yelling and furious.

Cop goes to me you can go. I get home my mom says calmly. The person you threw snowball out got out with a fake toy gun. Police thought it was real and witnesses got his plate and description of boys. He almost got you killed running in traffic to get away. He almost ran into traffic and the cops said he could have been shot if we saw a man with a gun chasing kids.

The police said we press no charges on anyone as long as we picked you up and never happens again. He got same deal. But his wife had to pick up.

That guy looked really scared. I Never threw another snowball and I guarantee he never touched a fake or real gun again.

But I was 12 he was like 40 in a business suit on way home from work. My dad was quick with the belt but even he thought it was crazy

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Forgot above: Then call the police.

But, what if the other person is Black? Are you willing to get someone killed just because they got a little mad in traffic?

Black people don’t do this. I’ve had crazy shit like this happen before, and it’s 100% of the time a specific group that’s not Black women or men…or white women.

100% of the time. Period.

[Black woman, NP]