Dead Parent's Birthdays
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Anonymous
| No- my in-laws were jerks, and I have no idea when they had bdays (dh was adopted). |
Anonymous
|
Tossing in some total weirdness for this thread--
No, because my dead father reminds me on his actual birthday that he's around. Yesterday was his birthday---I mentioned it to my DH of 18 years. |
Anonymous
No. Newsflash: they don’t care about your parent, let alone remembering a dead old person’s birthday |
Anonymous
No. |
Anonymous
| My spouse and their siblings recognize/celebrate both dead parents birthdays. I find it weird. The person is dead, giving a call and saying, "remember when mom/dad did that thing" is one thing, but most of the rest is over the top. Now if it's just been one year, and you have to do the gravestone per Judaism, that's one thing. But it's been over a decade (2 decades for one of them) |
Anonymous
| Depends. My family is really i to birthday but not death days. We all still get together on my grandparents bday if possible (they have been gone 10 years for one and 8 for another and about 5 for the other set). Its just something we do. Their birthdays were always a big family deal with a party and food and calls from friends and family. My spouse has it all on his calendar so a couple weeks ahead he asks (are we going to your moms for your grandmothers bday or are they coming here?). For what its work I'm an immigrant and only child from a small family. My DH found it odd the first couple of years but has now gotten into it. We share stories and memories and now my kids get to listen and learn about their family. |
Anonymous
| Nope |
Anonymous
|
I'll be the odd one out and say Yes I would expect that. I think it's sad for people to have such low expectations of their spouses. It's obviously something that's important to you so I'm sure they are aware of this.
It's not like it's some distant cousin it's your parent. My mother passed and yes I expect my husband to remember her birthday and her death date because those are significant dates to me and she was also someone who lived with us and helped with our children and had a significant impact in both of our lives so no it's asking too much for you to acknowledge her. |
Anonymous
|
One of my parents has been deceased for 30 years and I usually think about her on her birthday but would never expect my spouse to. Same on the anniversary of death- in fact I often forget the date (I know it’s generally X, but often forget if it is X, X + or - One.
My spouse’s father has been deceased for 5 years, and I never would remember either date for him. |
Anonymous
| No. I sometimes burn a candle both on my dad's and grandma's birthday if I have time. But it's for me. I never mention it to DH and he doesn't know about it. |
Anonymous
| I did and made a special dinner of his mom’s favorite foods that day to remember her for him. I have one parent who passed away and he’s never acknowledged the birthday but we weren’t that close so it doesn’t bother me. |