DS refusing to consider anything other than the south, southeast, TX and CA

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s great to experience different places when you’re young. The South is much more laid back and kinder than Massachusetts. Though Massachusetts does have some very loyal people, it just takes much more time to get to know people. They don’t open up as quickly. Winters are a pain too, hope he’s happy where he ends up.

The south is so kind that they consider 25 percent of the women in this country to be murderers. Nice!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m very pro choice and the Supreme Court opinion is appalling. I would never expect (or want, although it’s their decision) my kids to factor that decision into college choice. I’m hoping they practice safer sex and if not, I’ll be happy to get anyone where they need to go for health care if it becomes necessary.

But you have to be careful. The very red states, like Texas, are trying to implement penalty laws for anyone that has or conducts an abortion. And they are trying to make it so that their laws cover those who travel out of state to do so. Are you ready to be sued for $10K for aiding and abetting your son's girlfriend's abortion when she travels to another state to get an abortion. And there are other states who are trying to mimic this law. So, if your child wants to be sexually active (and most college students do want to be), then he needs to do some research into what his responsibilities will be and what laws are on the books or being considered for controlling abortion access including for those traveling out of state. The Dobbs decision is giving many conservative states very grandiose ideas of how to control these issues and until the courts can officially rule on the legality of these laws, every person who potentially conceives a fetus could be covered by these laws.

I think that the chances of this happening are so low that it's not an important enough consideration to affect college choice. It's like people who reject colleges due to gun laws - the risk of someone being shot on campus is still really really small. And for the people who don't want their funds to support those states -- that's fine, but again I think there are more important considerations at play. It's like saying that you are going to move out of the US due to [insert any immoral sh*t the US has been engaged in] -- for me, at least, there are more reasons to stay than to go, even knowing that a good portion of my taxes fund activities with which I don't agree.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: I am absolutely making abortion access a factor on where my DD goes to college.

If this is truly a factor in where your DD goes to college, then you have raised her with the morals of an alley cat. Sorry, but that's the truth.

Not this PP, but GFY. Truly, I mean that wholeheartedly.

It isn't about morals. College kids have sex. Accidents happen even with birth control.

I'm not sending my child to any state where the doctors refuse to operate for fear of losing their medical license over an incomplete miscarriage or an ectopic, leading to the death of my child because of draconian laws.

As a PP pointed out, your daughter has a far greater risk of dying from things other than pregnancy-related conditions. Posters have voiced several rationale/logical reasons not to send your kid to a red state for college, but doing so out of fear for your child's life isn't one of them. Otherwise, why do you let your kid drive a car?

[Anonymous]

Presumably the boy knows that Roe v Wade has been overturned and that many of the states where he is considering attending college have now restricted if not out right banned abortion. So this is his decision. He’s an adult.

[Anonymous]

Not going to a state that treats women like a uterus with legs is a pretty easy choice, AFAIAC.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Presumably the boy knows that Roe v Wade has been overturned and that many of the states where he is considering attending college have now restricted if not out right banned abortion. So this is his decision. He’s an adult.

Is he paying his own bills?

THAT is when the decision is completely his

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m very pro choice and the Supreme Court opinion is appalling. I would never expect (or want, although it’s their decision) my kids to factor that decision into college choice. I’m hoping they practice safer sex and if not, I’ll be happy to get anyone where they need to go for health care if it becomes necessary.

I expect my daughter to factor it in. It's not just about BC -- there are medical emergencies that don't give you enough time to get to another state. BC fails sometimes, and ectopic pregnancies can go south very quickly.

Exactly. Having to birth a dead baby is gross and dangerous and life threatening.

[Anonymous]

Good for him!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Presumably the boy knows that Roe v Wade has been overturned and that many of the states where he is considering attending college have now restricted if not out right banned abortion. So this is his decision. He’s an adult.

Is he paying his own bills?

THAT is when the decision is completely his

Oh I see. You’re one of THOSE parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: I am absolutely making abortion access a factor on where my DD goes to college.

+2. Already told her Texas, FLA and a some others are off the table.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Presumably the boy knows that Roe v Wade has been overturned and that many of the states where he is considering attending college have now restricted if not out right banned abortion. So this is his decision. He’s an adult.

Is he paying his own bills?

THAT is when the decision is completely his

Oh I see. You’re one of THOSE parents.

what, you let your dependent 18 year old spend your money on whatever they please?

I honestly don't think this is out of the ordinary to have a say in where money we have earned goes. Are you just going to let your kid go to a college you can't actually afford, too?

That's ridiculous

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: I am absolutely making abortion access a factor on where my DD goes to college.

If this is truly a factor in where your DD goes to college, then you have raised her with the morals of an alley cat. Sorry, but that's the truth.

Not this PP, but GFY. Truly, I mean that wholeheartedly.

It isn't about morals. College kids have sex. Accidents happen even with birth control.

I'm not sending my child to any state where the doctors refuse to operate for fear of losing their medical license over an incomplete miscarriage or an ectopic, leading to the death of my child because of draconian laws.

As a PP pointed out, your daughter has a far greater risk of dying from things other than pregnancy-related conditions. Posters have voiced several rationale/logical reasons not to send your kid to a red state for college, but doing so out of fear for your child's life isn't one of them. Otherwise, why do you let your kid drive a car?

The risk of dying from pregnancy related conditions FAR exceeds many other things, including any harm from an abortion. Stop lying.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m very pro choice and the Supreme Court opinion is appalling. I would never expect (or want, although it’s their decision) my kids to factor that decision into college choice. I’m hoping they practice safer sex and if not, I’ll be happy to get anyone where they need to go for health care if it becomes necessary.

I expect my daughter to factor it in. It's not just about BC -- there are medical emergencies that don't give you enough time to get to another state. BC fails sometimes, and ectopic pregnancies can go south very quickly.

Agreed. I think it should be a factor to consider, especially state like Texas where you could be liable even if you help someone get an abortion.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: I am absolutely making abortion access a factor on where my DD goes to college.

+2. Already told her Texas, FLA and a some others are off the table.

same here, although she said to me "Mom, I wasn't even considering those states anyway" So, it is a mutual decision to avoid states with backwards/regressive laws.

We are closely watching what happens in PA and NC, as those states are currently on the table. I cross my fingers for MI and WI to beat back the stupidity and get rid of the trigger bans.

I am also going to be closely watching our home state of VA.

Jersey, RI and MA look strong though!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m very pro choice and the Supreme Court opinion is appalling. I would never expect (or want, although it’s their decision) my kids to factor that decision into college choice. I’m hoping they practice safer sex and if not, I’ll be happy to get anyone where they need to go for health care if it becomes necessary.

I expect my daughter to factor it in. It's not just about BC -- there are medical emergencies that don't give you enough time to get to another state. BC fails sometimes, and ectopic pregnancies can go south very quickly.

You make valid points and I completely understand why families are making this a factor in college decisions. But I hope people are putting the risks in perspective. For example, there is a MUCH greater risk of a female college student getting killed in a car accident than getting pregnant while practicing safe sex/using birth control and then developing an ectopic pregnancy, or some similar condition, that requires immediate emergency treatment. And even if a state were to outlaw Plan B, have your kid take a supply with them -- no one's going to search their dorm room.

It represents an insidious disrespect for women and their freedom and privacy to go troll their own reproductive choices. Why go to state that is smacking it's women back 50 years in time in terms of their basic rights?

Not arguing with that. I respect those who make choices based on principles/values.

Sure unless those principles are unjust

But they have the right to make personal choices (not choices for others) based on their individual principles/values just the same.

Getting lost in this back and forth.

I stand by that you cannot justify outlawing abortion for all women if a state by claiming. "that is the value of that state. They tried to justify slavery with that states rights argument.

I certainly don't buy into that states rights crap used to justify the Civil War. I think we're just looking at this a little differently. I wasn't referring to the value of a "state" or any other kind of collective entity. And a choice that has a significant impact on another individual (i.e., enslaving someone) is different from a purely personal choice that by itself has only a tangential negative impact, at best, on others (e.g. "I'm not going to send my kid to college in that state.") I think it's reprehensible for someone to not patronize a business because it's owned by a person of color, but I wouldn't want that person thrown in jail for it. And I loath the pro-Trump BS that's out there on social media, but I don't want to take away the right of Americans to post that stuff.