Should we discuss our estate with my son in law or just my daughter.

[Anonymous]

We have a large estate 20,000,000 plus and have all of our money in very detailed trusts. At some point we need to discuss the details of our estate with our only daughter and we are not sure how to approach this. Should we sit our daughter down and discuss with her first or should we sit both of them down together?

[Anonymous]

I vote both together, unless you have reason not to. Who handles the finances in their family? Are there grandchildren involved? Is she your only child?

[Anonymous]

Ask your daughter what she would prefer.

[Anonymous]

He handles the finances as she is a SAHM. We have four grandchildren but they are all under 15 years old. Yes only child.

[Anonymous]

Both of them

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ask your daughter what she would prefer.

Obviously, this!

[Anonymous]

Ask daughter. From personal experience when I had to go through this with my family, it was sooo much better to have my husband with me. First, there were so many details. Second, it was hard because it was talking about things that would happen after one and then both my parents passed. I enjoyed having DH's support

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He handles the finances as she is a SAHM. We have four grandchildren but they are all under 15 years old. Yes only child.

If she is a SAHM, it's weird that she doesn't handle the finances.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He handles the finances as she is a SAHM. We have four grandchildren but they are all under 15 years old. Yes only child.

If she is a SAHM, it's weird that she doesn't handle the finances.

No it's not. Most SAHMs I know don't handle the money because they don't bring it in.

[Anonymous]

Ask your daughter what she would prefer. If she doesn't handle the finances, then she probably will want her husband involved so that he can understand the impact your estate will have on their finances.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He handles the finances as she is a SAHM. We have four grandchildren but they are all under 15 years old. Yes only child.

If she is a SAHM, it's weird that she doesn't handle the finances.

No it's not. Most SAHMs I know don't handle the money because they don't bring it in.

That's actually not true. Many sahms I know handle the finances. Unless you get divorced it doesn't matter who brings it in.

[Anonymous]

To hell with your daughter and sil. Adopt me and I'll manage it all

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He handles the finances as she is a SAHM. We have four grandchildren but they are all under 15 years old. Yes only child.

If she is a SAHM, it's weird that she doesn't handle the finances.

No it's not. Most SAHMs I know don't handle the money because they don't bring it in.

Wow, you sound controlling. In my home, I handle the money and I don't work. It doesn't matter.

[Anonymous]

Daughter. She can bring in the husband if she wants. You never know what is going on in a marriage. You are leaving money to her, not them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Daughter. She can bring in the husband if she wants. You never know what is going on in a marriage. You are leaving money to her, not them.

+1