One Night Stands

[Anonymous]

Single woman, 33 years old here. Went on a first date on Friday with a really cool guy, had an awesome time and ended-up sleeping with him. He hasn't called me. Did I mess up? I usually wait until date 3 to have sex and am no virgin but I'm not promiscuous either. I've only had three one nights stands in college. Can I fix this?

[Anonymous]

I would look at it as you found out up front what you were working with. Would you feel better if you had waited the 3 dates, invested your time & energy and then he didn't call?

[Anonymous]

be happy not to have to deal with a hypocrite.

[Anonymous]

Eh, I usually wait six or seven dates to have sex becasue that's my comfort level.

But I'm a big believer that if a guy would judge you for having sex on the he first date, he probably has sexist madonna whore issues and you are better off without him.

[Anonymous]

Has he reached out to say hello or anything?

Was the sex at least good? The only ONS I ever had was terrible.

[Rogue7]

Anonymous wrote:Single woman, 33 years old here. Went on a first date on Friday with a really cool guy, had an awesome time and ended-up sleeping with him. He hasn't called me. Did I mess up? I usually wait until date 3 to have sex and am no virgin but I'm not promiscuous either. I've only had three one nights stands in college. Can I fix this?

What is there to fix? You said you had an awesome time. I am going to assume he had a pretty good time also. You could actually call him if you want.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Single woman, 33 years old here. Went on a first date on Friday with a really cool guy, had an awesome time and ended-up sleeping with him. He hasn't called me. Did I mess up? I usually wait until date 3 to have sex and am no virgin but I'm not promiscuous either. I've only had three one nights stands in college. Can I fix this?

Poor judgement, live and learn

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would look at it as you found out up front what you were working with. Would you feel better if you had waited the 3 dates, invested your time & energy and then he didn't call?

Most decent guys don't want anything long term with women who do that. When she did that she kind of made that choice it wasn't going anywhere.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would look at it as you found out up front what you were working with. Would you feel better if you had waited the 3 dates, invested your time & energy and then he didn't call?

Most decent guys don't want anything long term with women who do that. When she did that she kind of made that choice it wasn't going anywhere.

Most decent guys wouldn't hold women to a higher standard than they hold themselves. If having a ONS makes someone "not marriage material," he's not worthy of marrying "a nice girl" because he had a ONS too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Single woman, 33 years old here. Went on a first date on Friday with a really cool guy, had an awesome time and ended-up sleeping with him. He hasn't called me. Did I mess up? I usually wait until date 3 to have sex and am no virgin but I'm not promiscuous either. I've only had three one nights stands in college. Can I fix this?

Yes don't sleep with guys until you have the expectation and commitment of a relationship. Not judging you at all but you asked what to do. You're not a ONS kind of person and that's ok.

[Anonymous]

I've waited months to sleep with someone who was just working towards that one thing. I've also ended up in a relationship with someone I slept with after the second date. A friend of mine married her booty call. I don't think the rules apply anymore. If he doesn't call, you found out in one date that he is a jerk. If this experience has been painful for you, I'd advise you to remember that going forward but don't beat yourself up about it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've waited months to sleep with someone who was just working towards that one thing. I've also ended up in a relationship with someone I slept with after the second date. A friend of mine married her booty call. I don't think the rules apply anymore. If he doesn't call, you found out in one date that he is a jerk. If this experience has been painful for you, I'd advise you to remember that going forward but don't beat yourself up about it.

They don't apply to everyone obviously, but overall yes. I wouldn't want a mate long term - male or female if they were promiscuous. Yes many feel that way today!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Single woman, 33 years old here. Went on a first date on Friday with a really cool guy, had an awesome time and ended-up sleeping with him. He hasn't called me. Did I mess up? I usually wait until date 3 to have sex and am no virgin but I'm not promiscuous either. I've only had three one nights stands in college. Can I fix this?

What are you doing next Saturday?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've waited months to sleep with someone who was just working towards that one thing. I've also ended up in a relationship with someone I slept with after the second date. A friend of mine married her booty call. I don't think the rules apply anymore. If he doesn't call, you found out in one date that he is a jerk. If this experience has been painful for you, I'd advise you to remember that going forward but don't beat yourself up about it.

But a jerk who got laid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I've waited months to sleep with someone who was just working towards that one thing. I've also ended up in a relationship with someone I slept with after the second date. A friend of mine married her booty call. I don't think the rules apply anymore. If he doesn't call, you found out in one date that he is a jerk. If this experience has been painful for you, I'd advise you to remember that going forward but don't beat yourself up about it.

But a jerk who got laid.

They both got laid.