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I would like to know if it's ever right for a person to be 100% honest with another person. Let's say someone close to you asks you to make a list of all the negative traits you see in them, how much honesty would you put on that list?
Thanks! |
| No one is ever 100 percent honest and the person who asked for that list is setting a trap. Run away. |
Exactly! And it could be a long time before that trap is sprung. |
| You need to refuse to play this game. |
Regardless of the degree of confidence? |
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What's your relation to the person and why are they asking?
I do sometimes wish I could get honest feedback from people but I'm too afraid to ask. |
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if your DH asked, be about 50% honest.
if your DW asked, be about 1.3459% honest |
My gf. I made a list of things I don't like. She identified a series of things in my list that she does and personalized the list, adding a few more things I have at some point said. Too late. I edited her list to bring clarity to the few which I had never observed her as being the source but did give her a clear picture that there are things we humans find annoying like being cut in mid-sentence, interrogation-type questioning, excess negativity, and a few more. Well, she has deemed my answers are total contempt and hate for her. When she complains about me is called expressing her feelings but when I do it is hate. WTF?
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Like I said, a trap. |
| That list is a strange request. How would that not result in a fight? I accept that my SO has things they dont like about me. I dont need them itemized. |
That stinks. So, your original list was a generic list of things you don't like that wasn't supposed to be about her? Maybe make a generic list of things you love and make sure about 90% of them apply to her and show her that? |
I was stupid enough, not to compile a list, but the fact that I shared the list with her. Of course we all have negative traits, I know I do. The thing is that we humans insist in honesty and we don't seem to be receptive to 100% honesty. I keep and pretty "friendly" relationship with my ex wife and upon asking her, I just received her not-so-favorable list. Yes, she does see a certain way and I agree with what she sees, though some of those pills were hard to swallow... |
| Yikes. Who would ASK for said list except in order to manipulate you?? She sounds like a bitch. Run, OP, RUN! |
Ok, the list. I have been reading a book on Dominance & submission by Michael Makai. I'm not trying to be a Dom, just reading to lear about the dynamic. Anyway, I came up with with my personal list of protocols which addresses some of those real life annoyances like those already mentioned and some more. You know, not the usual dumb shit Doms make their submissives do like standing on one leg for ten minutes. I even included bad traits I myself exhibit on my list. Well, I shared my list with her and you already know what happened next.
I should now compile a things I do love about her. |
Again, I was the dumbass who created and shared the list... |