When you decline a birthday party- do you tell your child?

[Anonymous]

One of kids was invited to a party that I want to decline. It was nice of them to invite him (he actually doesn't get invited to a ton of parties) but he has a time conflict, and the location of the party would be extremely logistically challenging for us. I'm torn about whether I tell him about the party (which he kind of knows about- kids talk- he's in K) but also tell him he can't go- or if I just decline it and don't mention it further to him.
(His conflict is that he has a sports class at the same time he really likes and looks forward to all week.).

[Anonymous]

How old is he? If he's old enough that they're talking about it at school, I'd tell him. If he's younger than 6, I wouldn't worry about it.

[Anonymous]

Not at that age.

[Anonymous]

Could you give him the option of going? If that doesn't work, I wouldn't tell him about it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How old is he? If he's old enough that they're talking about it at school, I'd tell him. If he's younger than 6, I wouldn't worry about it.

Sorry, just saw the K. Nah, just leave it.

[Anonymous]

I would tell him, so he's not confused/on the spot if it comes up.

[Anonymous]

Good friend, we skip sports and go. Casual friend, we don't mention it and decline.

[Anonymous]

I would definitely tell him. Kids are going to talk and he's going to feel left out if you don't tell him. Also, if he doesn't get invited to a lot of parties, he might really want to go. Don't know what the conflict is, but maybe he could choose.

[Anonymous]

I have a 6yo girl and of course have told her when this has happened. "Larlo invited you to his birthday party, but since it's at the same time as _____, I told his mom you couldn't come this time."

[Anonymous]

I always did, but my kid isn't all that sensitive about things in general. We definitely did some makeup classes due to skipping to attend birthday parties.

[Anonymous]

We try to make it unless we are out of town. I actually try to do very few weekend activities so that we can travel and get together with friends.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Good friend, we skip sports and go. Casual friend, we don't mention it and decline.

This, especially at that age.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a 6yo girl and of course have told her when this has happened. "Larlo invited you to his birthday party, but since it's at the same time as _____, I told his mom you couldn't come this time."

This! But i would let him go if he doesn't get asked to many parties. Sometimes a party once s year is better for the kid then making every practice.
Let him decide.

[Anonymous]

thanks- I'm the OP. I thought about letting him decide. My problem with that is that we are a 1 car family. One of our other kids is also enrolled in the sports class, but not invited to the party. A third sibling has neither. The sports class is not very public transportation accessible. The party is a long way away. So if the car goes to the party with one parent, the other parent needs to take both other kids (one of whom is not in the class) via taxi to sports class- which doesn't really work very well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:thanks- I'm the OP. I thought about letting him decide. My problem with that is that we are a 1 car family. One of our other kids is also enrolled in the sports class, but not invited to the party. A third sibling has neither. The sports class is not very public transportation accessible. The party is a long way away. So if the car goes to the party with one parent, the other parent needs to take both other kids (one of whom is not in the class) via taxi to sports class- which doesn't really work very well.

Can you ask another parent to take him?