Husband's sibling can't handle his own child

[Anonymous]

Just a vent. DH has a brother whose son is 6 months older than our son, 12 and 18 months respectively. They rely heavily on my MIL for childcare, for example when their son is sick and can't go to daycare, when they go out of town, and on weekend evenings/date nights. Now SIL is pregnant with #2. She is due in July. In June of this year, we have invited MIL and FIL on an overseas trip, and they are now bringing my nephew along, because it's so close to SIL's due date. We have plenty of room and have the toddler logistics are manageable because we have a toddler as well. Having my nephew in the trip will be fun. I just can't believe my in laws are buying him a ticket, flying overseas, etc just so my BIL and SIL will not be "overburdened". With their own child.

[Anonymous]

I don't get it. Your SIL is close to her due date so the grandparents are helping out with a toddler. What's not to get? You sound really nasty.

[Anonymous]

That does seem a bit ridiculous--but also kind as long as it truly works for everyone.

[Anonymous]

What is your real issue? That you'll be stuck taking care of both toddlers on vacation? Jealousy at the help they receive with childcare? The situation itself is odd, but not necessarily worth getting upset about.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't get it. Your SIL is close to her due date so the grandparents are helping out with a toddler. What's not to get? You sound really nasty.

Yup. I'm totally judging. They are totally fine with letting my 70 year old grandparents haul a toddler on an 8 hour flight so they won't be overwhelmed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't get it. Your SIL is close to her due date so the grandparents are helping out with a toddler. What's not to get? You sound really nasty.

Yup. I'm totally judging. They are totally fine with letting my 70 year old grandparents haul a toddler on an 8 hour flight so they won't be overwhelmed.

And if they didn't help you....there'd be a post about that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What is your real issue? That you'll be stuck taking care of both toddlers on vacation? Jealousy at the help they receive with childcare? The situation itself is odd, but not necessarily worth getting upset about.

My real issue is this- this is a trip of a lifetime for my in laws. It includes travel for MIL to her country of origin, where she has not been in many years. But BIL and SIL are like whatever can you take care of our kid on your trip of a lifetime?

[Anonymous]

I can't believe that your sense of injustice is triggered by people helping others.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can't believe that your sense of injustice is triggered by people helping others.

My sense of injustice is triggered by people taking advantage of the good nature of others.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can't believe that your sense of injustice is triggered by people helping others.

My sense of injustice is triggered by people taking advantage of the good nature of others.

I do think your BIL and SIL are taking advantage of the grandparents. I imagine that the grandparents are going to live to regret taking their nephew on the trip. I also think it's really weird that they are doing this. Shipping him off when a new sibling is coming? I don't think that is going to help his adjustment to a sibling. I also think it's ridiculous that they are unable to take care of their only child. God help them once the new baby comes. Finally, if I were you I would be annoyed that another kid is coming on the trip, sounds like a nightmare and presumably your nephew will miss his parents. There isn't much you can do though. Your DH can talk to his parents about how difficult it will be and he can say he is worried it is going to be too much but that is about it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What is your real issue? That you'll be stuck taking care of both toddlers on vacation? Jealousy at the help they receive with childcare? The situation itself is odd, but not necessarily worth getting upset about.

My real issue is this- this is a trip of a lifetime for my in laws. It includes travel for MIL to her country of origin, where she has not been in many years. But BIL and SIL are like whatever can you take care of our kid on your trip of a lifetime?

Are you going to see MIL's extended family while you are there? Do you think she likes the idea of showing off her grandchildren while she is there? It's definitely a lot to take on for both you and your in-laws, but it seems like there is more to it than them just being pushovers.

[Anonymous]

MYOB, OP -- don't become another boring evil old SIL mutating into a despicable aunt. Your age and jealousy are showing. You're tedious and soon everyone will find you boring.

DCUM posters already do!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can't believe that your sense of injustice is triggered by people helping others.

My sense of injustice is triggered by people taking advantage of the good nature of others.

I hear an entitled 40+ y.o. spoiled brat ranting!

[Anonymous]

I'm with the OP on this one. BIL and SIL sound like they are entitled, spoiled and assuming that everyone around them is just "there to serve" their imagined needs.

[Anonymous]

None of your business, OP. At all.