If your family member married their AP

[Anonymous]

The deluge of affair/cheating threads floating around made me wonder: If your family member married their affair partner, and people know that it was their AP, how was it received by everyone? How was your family member received by the AP's family?

[Anonymous]

Everyone is cool with it.

[Anonymous]

Were they cool when you were bringing your married AP around them or did you wait until the AP had divorced before you introduced AP to your family?

[Anonymous]

My MIL married her AP. Everyone acts like it never happened.

[Anonymous]

My dad didn't marry his, but they cohabitated for 20+ years after everything camp to light. She was unwelcome at extended family gatherings. She was not invited to any major milestone events for me or my siblings and was specifically banned from my grandmother's funeral. My aunt (dad's brother's wife) once called dad's AP a whore to her face. Much of the ire was class based (AP worked retail and had a GED) and assumed she set out to trap my dad. I only just recently found out that was actually a correct assumption. Her own marriage was failing and she had two little kids. After my dad knocked her up, she left her husband and my dad supported her through CC). I don't say any of this proudly. My dad basically got off much lighter in the Scarlet Letter department. Even my mom's family always treated him politely afterwards and he was a pallbearer when my other grandmother (mom's mom) died.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My dad didn't marry his, but they cohabitated for 20+ years after everything camp to light. She was unwelcome at extended family gatherings. She was not invited to any major milestone events for me or my siblings and was specifically banned from my grandmother's funeral. My aunt (dad's brother's wife) once called dad's AP a whore to her face. Much of the ire was class based (AP worked retail and had a GED) and assumed she set out to trap my dad. I only just recently found out that was actually a correct assumption. Her own marriage was failing and she had two little kids. After my dad knocked her up, she left her husband and my dad supported her through CC). I don't say any of this proudly. My dad basically got off much lighter in the Scarlet Letter department. Even my mom's family always treated him politely afterwards and he was a pallbearer when my other grandmother (mom's mom) died.

Your dad's partner was banned from his own mother's funeral?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My MIL married her AP. Everyone acts like it never happened.

Acts like what never happened? The affair or the marriage or both?

[Anonymous]

My mom is with hers for 25 years, although they are not married. Our family tolerates him, but I do not consider him a family member and basically avoid him. For example I did not allow him to be in my wedding. When my mom talks about him I change the subject. I understand that she loves him and that he treats her well, however he has made many poor choices in his life and she will have to support him completely in old age.

If he wasn't such an annoying loser, my family would probably like him more. I often wonder why she couldn't throw away her integrity and humiliate our family with someone more responsible.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My dad didn't marry his, but they cohabitated for 20+ years after everything camp to light. She was unwelcome at extended family gatherings. She was not invited to any major milestone events for me or my siblings and was specifically banned from my grandmother's funeral. My aunt (dad's brother's wife) once called dad's AP a whore to her face. Much of the ire was class based (AP worked retail and had a GED) and assumed she set out to trap my dad. I only just recently found out that was actually a correct assumption. Her own marriage was failing and she had two little kids. After my dad knocked her up, she left her husband and my dad supported her through CC). I don't say any of this proudly. My dad basically got off much lighter in the Scarlet Letter department. Even my mom's family always treated him politely afterwards and he was a pallbearer when my other grandmother (mom's mom) died.

Your dad's partner was banned from his own mother's funeral?

Yep. The same aunt who called her a whore planned the funeral and called all the shots.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My dad didn't marry his, but they cohabitated for 20+ years after everything camp to light. She was unwelcome at extended family gatherings. She was not invited to any major milestone events for me or my siblings and was specifically banned from my grandmother's funeral. My aunt (dad's brother's wife) once called dad's AP a whore to her face. Much of the ire was class based (AP worked retail and had a GED) and assumed she set out to trap my dad. I only just recently found out that was actually a correct assumption. Her own marriage was failing and she had two little kids. After my dad knocked her up, she left her husband and my dad supported her through CC). I don't say any of this proudly. My dad basically got off much lighter in the Scarlet Letter department. Even my mom's family always treated him politely afterwards and he was a pallbearer when my other grandmother (mom's mom) died.

Your dad's partner was banned from his own mother's funeral?

Yep. The same aunt who called her a whore planned the funeral and called all the shots.

Wow. That's messed up.

[Anonymous]

When I read this threads, I wonder why some people bother to form families. This forum needs to be renamed into Family Drama. Are there any cool, not-so-judgy people left? Helloooo! Where are you? LOL

[Anonymous]

Can someone please tell me what AP stands for? I've searched high and low, and can't figure it out! I'm usually pretty good at figuring out what acronyms stand for based on context but this has me stumped.

[Anonymous]

Affair partner I think

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My dad didn't marry his, but they cohabitated for 20+ years after everything camp to light. She was unwelcome at extended family gatherings. She was not invited to any major milestone events for me or my siblings and was specifically banned from my grandmother's funeral. My aunt (dad's brother's wife) once called dad's AP a whore to her face. Much of the ire was class based (AP worked retail and had a GED) and assumed she set out to trap my dad. I only just recently found out that was actually a correct assumption. Her own marriage was failing and she had two little kids. After my dad knocked her up, she left her husband and my dad supported her through CC). I don't say any of this proudly. My dad basically got off much lighter in the Scarlet Letter department. Even my mom's family always treated him politely afterwards and he was a pallbearer when my other grandmother (mom's mom) died.

Your dad's partner was banned from his own mother's funeral?

Yep. The same aunt who called her a whore planned the funeral and called all the shots.

Wow. That's messed up.

Yep. Looking back on it, I think it was a warning to my uncle to keep his junk in his pants.

[Anonymous]

FIL married his. And now denies there was any funny business before divorcing MIL. MIL has shared explicit details discovered by her PI. Very sad that he's not even admit his guilt when there is documented proof.

Anyway, aside from him continuing to act like a self-centered asshole, everyone (except MIL) just ignores it.

As an outsider I find it all very f'ed up. No funny business in my own family.