Daughter ruining career prospects

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is always sad to see parents who just plain lack the faith that their kids will figure things out and maybe even -gasp- come up with a better plan for themselves than old mom and dad could have.

Like, believe in your kids! If you cant, who will?

Letting a middle-class kid go into the publishing or NPO world isn't "believing in your kid" -- it's being completely irresponsible.

Here's what I think will happen to my daughter. It's copied from this excellent thread. We don't live in a rural area, but most everything else is true:

https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/210/791426.page

Here's how this happens. It's not ultra common, but it does happen, and it's not so simple as "make better choices". Because many of the choices are made before the person has the necessary info, and often they are working on information that is bad or very misleading:

- Larla grows up in rural or remote part of the country. Low cost of living, middle or working class parents who don't struggle a ton to make ends meet because low COL. Larla has pleasant childhood without a lot of class strife thanks to this.

- Larla is very good at school, and opportunities in this area are limited. It's not near a larger city. The area doesn't have a ton of arts, culture, or commerce. Larla very quickly develops interest in leaving area because of these limitations and because they are very successful academically, this starts to feel like a real possibility.

- Larla goes to college far away, a "good school" likely with some or a lot of merit aid. Larla's grades and test scores qualified her for school, but her admission probably has a lot to do with her - background too -- these schools like diversity and being from some remote place stands out.

- Maybe the school is in a big city, but maybe in little college town, but either way, winds up in a student population with people from much more cosmopolitan backgrounds. Some are wealthy, some are UMC, some might be MC or WC but from places with greater diversity (of people and experiences). This means everyone understands a lot more about how the world works than Larla, even the other kids on financial aid and who have to work. Larla is straight up naive.

- Larla makes friends, and her friends educate her a bit about the world. The problem is, they are naive too, because they don't even understand what they know. They explain stuff to Larla, but it overemphasizes the fairness of the system. They gloss over stuff like the value of family connections or the fact that they are from families that really, really support and emphasize higher education (something Larla's family probably doesn't value to the same degree because of very different environments and circumstances). Larla starts to think she's figuring things out, but she's only getting a very small part of the picture.

- Larla makes career choices, decides where to move after school, based on her naive assumptions coupled with a pretty incomplete explanation of the world gleaned from young people who are really still just figuring it out. What Larla could really use at this point is a parent or relative who can say "Whoa, wait -- some of these kids have trust funds. Some of them can live in their aunt's apartment while they intern. Some of them have parents who will will do anything to cover the cost of a graduate degree because it's important to them. You need to make different choices based on your specific situation. How about Philly instead of NYC? How about marketing instead of publishing? Maybe what you really want is to write -- get an ed degree, teach high school English, and write! Or pursue an academic degree but get used to living in midwestern college towns, which are at least cheap."

- So instead, Larla figures this out on her own over the course of a decade or so. It's revealed in fits and starts, and often she only learns a key piece of information after it's too late to do much with it (like that an MFA is treated as required in publishing, but has no actual value in terms of earning, something that should actually be a required release of info before anyone enrolls in an MFA program). She also gets deeper into a career and social circle that will simply reinforce her value system, making it harder and harder to pull herself out. She might contemplate moving to Chicago or Portland or Denver, but her NY friends will say "OMG no, I could never" and she's only 28 and her family doesn't understand her anymore either, so she holds onto those values even though they don't serve her.

It's a sucky thing. Yes, she was naive and stupid and made bad choices. But it's also kind of hard to blame her because she's kind of been thrown to the wolves. Her university probably should have offered her some kind of practical economic education, but that would require being honest about their student body and their funding and the value of their degree, so: no. Same with the MFA. Her friends are self-interested in believing that they earned their way (to a degree they may have, in other ways not). Also, Larla doesn't have a stereotypical hard luck upbringing. She's not from poverty, her parents have steady jobs, she had a nice childhood. The fact that it in no way prepared her for the life she is now leading doesn't concern anyone because she is a [almost certainly white] middle class lady with a fancy college degree. It's just that none of those things are really helping her right now and she'd have to go back in time, or totally upend her entire values system, to change it. It's what she should do, but it's understandable that she is struggling.

I feel really bad for people in this situation. This is why it helps to have savvy parents who get how the world works, why you are lucky to find mentors or honest friends who tell it like it is. It can save you. Some people never get that and they get stuck.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is always sad to see parents who just plain lack the faith that their kids will figure things out and maybe even -gasp- come up with a better plan for themselves than old mom and dad could have.

Like, believe in your kids! If you cant, who will?

Letting a middle-class kid go into the publishing or NPO world isn't "believing in your kid" -- it's being completely irresponsible.

Jeez - so at what point do you finally let go of micromanaging your kids choices? When they change their phone number?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I majored in political science. I didn’t have any “coveted” internships during undergrad. The summer after my junior year, I lived at home after coming back from study abroad and just hung out. I ended up at a top 10 university for grad school, did 10 years as an analyst at a very coveted fed agency and currently work for a bulge bracket bank (aka Citigroup, JP Morgan, etc.).

What you major in, or where you intern, is much less important than how you leverage your skills in the workplace.

You probably graduated in the 90s when hiring practices were wildly different. And you are the rare exception to the rule — most BB IB folks had that covered junior summer internship (which, BTW, are given out 14 months before the start date now).

I graduated in 2009.

I’m a 2009 grad who worked in MBB (and did a summer in finance) and you and I both know your path is the exception not the rule. I think OP is crazy for the record, but anecdotes like yours are incredibly misleading. Can you get in on a non traditional path? Of course. But, it’s very hard.

I don’t work in consulting and never said I did, so I don’t know why your experience and mine are related.

My point is that I'm very familiar with finance (and hypercompetitive jobs like it) and I know enough to know that your experience is not typical. That's all. Like I said, OP is a nutjob, but if this were a path OP's daughter wanted, it would be far more prudent to follow the traditional path than try to be the 0.01% exception. I'm sure out there some MC kid who doesn't know much about these careers is reading this while trying to get up to speed. And I want him/her to know the game and not be misled about how to play it.

I was once that kid. And posts like yours can be more dangerous than you realize. (Not that I think you have bad intent. You're just not seeing past your own survivor bias.)

Bank jobs are much broader than pure finance/MC sorts of things. You seem to have a narrow view of what working for a BB FI means.

You're being intentionally misleading. I agree with PP here. It's an anonymous forum, no need to have an ego about working at a BB when your role is not the one being targeted by OP (misguided or not), and you know it.

Since most people on here seem to be unfamiliar with finance jobs, why not just be upfront about what your actual role is?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, my daughter's pathway appears to be somewhat similar. She is currently a sophomore at an elite school. How I have a clearer idea what to expect...

Look, it's the system. Our middle class kids get into these top schools by jumping though every hoop with our guidance. However, they never become truly independent. They never screwed anything up as teens, or they would never make it to Ivy(+).

So now they have to launch, and they just can't.

I do agree with others that the best path is focus on supporting her emotionally, be firm re no financial support after graduation, and focus on keeping your relationship. If she is so far gone as saying she wants to work on a farm for a while and then maybe write about environmental issues, she is probably depressed and has a social anxiety. Count your blessings she is not addressing them with alcohol and drugs. Hope and pray she graduates.

That’s what I thought at first too, but DD’s other actions (high GPA, lots of extracurricular involvement on campus — albeit not in preprofessional clubs) indicates otherwise. I don’t think she’s depressed or anxious. I think she just lacks the grit, resilience, and perseverance necessary to make bold career moves at such a crucial time in her life. Hence why she’s retreating into this Peter Pan summer camp counselor bullshit.

Well, she is comfortable studying and learning, and she does that way better than 99% of the country - that is why she is a "smart kid" admit to Ivy (+).
She can do that while depressed or anxious, it is the thing she does best.
When I did my research, there are about 200 kids per state who make that bar. Most admits are hooked somehow. Kids like yours and mine are vanishingly rate.

Ivy(+) colleges do their best to avoid families like yours and mine:

1. We qualify for lots of financial aid.
2. Our kids are often only good at academics.

Plus, both of our kids have this problem that they are pretty good at everything, but are truly exceptional in something that does not pay. For yours, it is reading and writing. She tried a FAANG internship and hated it. She wants to find something she likes. She hopes it exists. Unfortunately, very good chance it does not. I would let her do whatever this summer and just hope she graduates.

With a degree like hers and her youth, in this country there are always second chances. She will graduate, work some kind of a job, face her depression / anxiety, go to counseling, take meds, regroup, and do something good by 30. Your challenge is to remain her friend during that time.

OP here. Look, I get what you're saying, but she needs to face the truth now -- and the truth is, as you've stated, her "dream job" doesn't exist because her strengths (reading and writing and activist stuff) are not things that lead themselves to a living wage. I can't just "let her do whatever this summer and just hope she graduates" because she'll be delaying her adulthood and feeding into her Peter Pan syndrome. She needs to be slapped in the face with the cold, harsh truth of adult reality for girls like her, which is that all of her "dream jobs" are for rich kids whose parents will be subsidizing their downpayment. That's obviously not us, so she needs to get over that fear and anxious dread of the working world and face the uncomfortable reality of being an adult straight-on. And letting her be a summer camp counselor instead of seeing the soul-sucking nature of working for a decent wage (which publishing/NPO work can't provide) would just be irresponsible -- and arguably emotionally manipulative -- of me.

Wow,wow,wow. You're just vile. You're not a good parent, and you're an awful person. Why can't your daughter be a journalist?

And what is this Peter Pan bullcrap you're spewing.

I knew plenty of kids with parents like you. It didn't turn out how you think. They ended up angry with their parents, and still seeking what they want.

You're on a fast track to alienating your child and years of therapy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, my daughter's pathway appears to be somewhat similar. She is currently a sophomore at an elite school. How I have a clearer idea what to expect...

Look, it's the system. Our middle class kids get into these top schools by jumping though every hoop with our guidance. However, they never become truly independent. They never screwed anything up as teens, or they would never make it to Ivy(+).

So now they have to launch, and they just can't.

I do agree with others that the best path is focus on supporting her emotionally, be firm re no financial support after graduation, and focus on keeping your relationship. If she is so far gone as saying she wants to work on a farm for a while and then maybe write about environmental issues, she is probably depressed and has a social anxiety. Count your blessings she is not addressing them with alcohol and drugs. Hope and pray she graduates.

Wanting to work on a farm and write on environmental issues doesn't equal a depressed child.

You people are insane thinking that the only path is BB analyst to PE. That's not normal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I majored in political science. I didn’t have any “coveted” internships during undergrad. The summer after my junior year, I lived at home after coming back from study abroad and just hung out. I ended up at a top 10 university for grad school, did 10 years as an analyst at a very coveted fed agency and currently work for a bulge bracket bank (aka Citigroup, JP Morgan, etc.).

What you major in, or where you intern, is much less important than how you leverage your skills in the workplace.

You probably graduated in the 90s when hiring practices were wildly different. And you are the rare exception to the rule — most BB IB folks had that covered junior summer internship (which, BTW, are given out 14 months before the start date now).

I graduated in 2009.

I’m a 2009 grad who worked in MBB (and did a summer in finance) and you and I both know your path is the exception not the rule. I think OP is crazy for the record, but anecdotes like yours are incredibly misleading. Can you get in on a non traditional path? Of course. But, it’s very hard.

I don’t work in consulting and never said I did, so I don’t know why your experience and mine are related.

My point is that I'm very familiar with finance (and hypercompetitive jobs like it) and I know enough to know that your experience is not typical. That's all. Like I said, OP is a nutjob, but if this were a path OP's daughter wanted, it would be far more prudent to follow the traditional path than try to be the 0.01% exception. I'm sure out there some MC kid who doesn't know much about these careers is reading this while trying to get up to speed. And I want him/her to know the game and not be misled about how to play it.

I was once that kid. And posts like yours can be more dangerous than you realize. (Not that I think you have bad intent. You're just not seeing past your own survivor bias.)

Bank jobs are much broader than pure finance/MC sorts of things. You seem to have a narrow view of what working for a BB FI means.

You're being intentionally misleading. I agree with PP here. It's an anonymous forum, no need to have an ego about working at a BB when your role is not the one being targeted by OP (misguided or not), and you know it.

Since most people on here seem to be unfamiliar with finance jobs, why not just be upfront about what your actual role is?

Because I don’t want to risk outing myself. But if you think all jobs at big banks are essentially finance/consulting roles, then you’re just ignorant and I don’t feel the need to educate you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'd say probably 75% of my law class was humanities majors. Lots of History majors in there for sure.

Again: Law school is almost always a bad decision and most lawyers highly discourage their own kids from becoming one.

You can keep saying that. But I know many, many multigenerational lawyer families. Most lawyers will not *push* their kids to go to law school, because it has to be something you really want to do (just like working in tech or finance!). However, it’s not a surprise that a child of lawyers would be inclined toward practicing law.

Signed, third generation lawyer whose kid will probably go to law school

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, my daughter's pathway appears to be somewhat similar. She is currently a sophomore at an elite school. How I have a clearer idea what to expect...

Look, it's the system. Our middle class kids get into these top schools by jumping though every hoop with our guidance. However, they never become truly independent. They never screwed anything up as teens, or they would never make it to Ivy(+).

So now they have to launch, and they just can't.

I do agree with others that the best path is focus on supporting her emotionally, be firm re no financial support after graduation, and focus on keeping your relationship. If she is so far gone as saying she wants to work on a farm for a while and then maybe write about environmental issues, she is probably depressed and has a social anxiety. Count your blessings she is not addressing them with alcohol and drugs. Hope and pray she graduates.

That’s what I thought at first too, but DD’s other actions (high GPA, lots of extracurricular involvement on campus — albeit not in preprofessional clubs) indicates otherwise. I don’t think she’s depressed or anxious. I think she just lacks the grit, resilience, and perseverance necessary to make bold career moves at such a crucial time in her life. Hence why she’s retreating into this Peter Pan summer camp counselor bullshit.

Well, she is comfortable studying and learning, and she does that way better than 99% of the country - that is why she is a "smart kid" admit to Ivy (+).
She can do that while depressed or anxious, it is the thing she does best.
When I did my research, there are about 200 kids per state who make that bar. Most admits are hooked somehow. Kids like yours and mine are vanishingly rate.

Ivy(+) colleges do their best to avoid families like yours and mine:

1. We qualify for lots of financial aid.
2. Our kids are often only good at academics.

Plus, both of our kids have this problem that they are pretty good at everything, but are truly exceptional in something that does not pay. For yours, it is reading and writing. She tried a FAANG internship and hated it. She wants to find something she likes. She hopes it exists. Unfortunately, very good chance it does not. I would let her do whatever this summer and just hope she graduates.

With a degree like hers and her youth, in this country there are always second chances. She will graduate, work some kind of a job, face her depression / anxiety, go to counseling, take meds, regroup, and do something good by 30. Your challenge is to remain her friend during that time.

OP here. Look, I get what you're saying, but she needs to face the truth now -- and the truth is, as you've stated, her "dream job" doesn't exist because her strengths (reading and writing and activist stuff) are not things that lead themselves to a living wage. I can't just "let her do whatever this summer and just hope she graduates" because she'll be delaying her adulthood and feeding into her Peter Pan syndrome. She needs to be slapped in the face with the cold, harsh truth of adult reality for girls like her, which is that all of her "dream jobs" are for rich kids whose parents will be subsidizing their downpayment. That's obviously not us, so she needs to get over that fear and anxious dread of the working world and face the uncomfortable reality of being an adult straight-on. And letting her be a summer camp counselor instead of seeing the soul-sucking nature of working for a decent wage (which publishing/NPO work can't provide) would just be irresponsible -- and arguably emotionally manipulative -- of me.

Wow,wow,wow. You're just vile. You're not a good parent, and you're an awful person. Why can't your daughter be a journalist?

And what is this Peter Pan bullcrap you're spewing.

I knew plenty of kids with parents like you. It didn't turn out how you think. They ended up angry with their parents, and still seeking what they want.

You're on a fast track to alienating your child and years of therapy.

100% agree with this. You are awful and thank god not my parent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I majored in political science. I didn’t have any “coveted” internships during undergrad. The summer after my junior year, I lived at home after coming back from study abroad and just hung out. I ended up at a top 10 university for grad school, did 10 years as an analyst at a very coveted fed agency and currently work for a bulge bracket bank (aka Citigroup, JP Morgan, etc.).

What you major in, or where you intern, is much less important than how you leverage your skills in the workplace.

You probably graduated in the 90s when hiring practices were wildly different. And you are the rare exception to the rule — most BB IB folks had that covered junior summer internship (which, BTW, are given out 14 months before the start date now).

I graduated in 2009.

I’m a 2009 grad who worked in MBB (and did a summer in finance) and you and I both know your path is the exception not the rule. I think OP is crazy for the record, but anecdotes like yours are incredibly misleading. Can you get in on a non traditional path? Of course. But, it’s very hard.

I don’t work in consulting and never said I did, so I don’t know why your experience and mine are related.

My point is that I'm very familiar with finance (and hypercompetitive jobs like it) and I know enough to know that your experience is not typical. That's all. Like I said, OP is a nutjob, but if this were a path OP's daughter wanted, it would be far more prudent to follow the traditional path than try to be the 0.01% exception. I'm sure out there some MC kid who doesn't know much about these careers is reading this while trying to get up to speed. And I want him/her to know the game and not be misled about how to play it.

I was once that kid. And posts like yours can be more dangerous than you realize. (Not that I think you have bad intent. You're just not seeing past your own survivor bias.)

Bank jobs are much broader than pure finance/MC sorts of things. You seem to have a narrow view of what working for a BB FI means.

You're being intentionally misleading. I agree with PP here. It's an anonymous forum, no need to have an ego about working at a BB when your role is not the one being targeted by OP (misguided or not), and you know it.

Since most people on here seem to be unfamiliar with finance jobs, why not just be upfront about what your actual role is?

Because I don’t want to risk outing myself. But if you think all jobs at big banks are essentially finance/consulting roles, then you’re just ignorant and I don’t feel the need to educate you.

Of course we know that not all jobs at big banks are finance. That’s why we’re saying you’re being misleading.

When people at top schools are talking about getting a job at MBB or at a BB (Bulge Bracket investment bank), they mean
- MBB: analyst consulting roles right out of college or business school; typically responsible for analysis and slide generation for a work stream
- BB: doing investment banking (a product or coverage group), sales and trading, or investment management.

At the UG level, that means getting a junior internship and if you do well, an offer to return after graduation. That’s the path for 99% of people and the jobs are tough to get.

A bank like JP Morgan employs north of 100,000 people. That includes investment bankers, but also paralegals, HR recruiters, marketing, compliance, an internal accounting team etc. All the more back officey jobs that you need to run a succcessful company. I suspect your role is more like these and these are great jobs! But when you say you work in finance (after “grad” school and work at an agency - not a traditional MBA) in the context of a convo like this, you’re leading people to believe you found the back door to investment banking when you’re doing something else altogether.

It’s sort of like this acquaintance I have that often calls herself a “Woman in Tech” and likes to talk about how she loves being in a competitive field like “Tech.” She knows full well that when most people hear that, they think software developing/engineer. She actually does advertising sales after being a social sciences major. A job to very proud of for sure, but as DCUM likes to say, ad sales is not tech. It’s sales.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There are way too many insane people on this thread. As someone who lacked direction for years and definitely didn't obsess over corporate internships during undergrad, my life has been far richer for that time spent wandering.

And yeah, I have a well paying, prestigious job. It's amazing how much more interesting interviewers and coworkers have found me to be compared to all the boring people who never lived a minute of life.

Precisely. Thank you. And I’d much rather hire a kid who actually had boring, thankless jobs like camp counselor or receptionist, than some entitled brat who thinks they’re god’s gift to a workplace because they went to an Ivy (and fwiw I went to prestigious, non Ivy, undergrad)…all of you are insane. Her life won’t be ruined because she declined joining the rat race while in college.

No. This mentality is what ruins young people. Your 20s are the time to start taking yourself seriously. 20 year olds like OP’s daughter would be MASSIVELY disadvantaging herself by choosing a camp counselor summer job rather than the corporate internship. Meg Jay’s “Defining Decade” talks about this a lot — she’s a therapist who specializes in young adults, and they NEED to get going and be an adult rather than living out this extended adolescence.

Yeah, no. This is how to get your kids to be burned out and bitter by 38. There's a huge difference between doing your own thing and finding yourself, and living at home after failing to launch. The former isn't an extended adolescence. I'm sorry you see the world in such black and white terms.

If you had read the book I mentioned, you’d know that “finding yourself” through infantilizing rituals like summer camp counselor is what leads to resentment.

It’s a book, written by a person. It’s their opinion. It’s not a Bible. Unclench.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I think I’m going to tell her that we can’t afford to pay for her last semester of college, so she’ll have to come up with $20k on her own. That would force her to take the internship and also take out the $7k FAFSA loan for her senior year.

OK, now you’re a troll.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I think I’m going to tell her that we can’t afford to pay for her last semester of college, so she’ll have to come up with $20k on her own. That would force her to take the internship and also take out the $7k FAFSA loan for her senior year.

Wow you are nuts. Look, I’m not some tree hugging do gooder (I proudly went the corporate route and am happy with my path), but this is not the solution.

I truly worry for your daughter. And for you.

I think it’s a good solution. Clearly the DD isn’t motivated enough on her own, so she needs some fear in her.

Hi, OP!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I think I’m going to tell her that we can’t afford to pay for her last semester of college, so she’ll have to come up with $20k on her own. That would force her to take the internship and also take out the $7k FAFSA loan for her senior year.

You are a total jerk for pulling the rug under her. And, you can afford it. Because you would have paid it if she’d jumped through your hoops. So, you’re a liar too.

She knows you think she’s a failure. How sad.

And the truth is that Mom is the failure. Hopefully her daughter recognizes that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I think I’m going to tell her that we can’t afford to pay for her last semester of college, so she’ll have to come up with $20k on her own. That would force her to take the internship and also take out the $7k FAFSA loan for her senior year.

I'd divorce you if you tried to pull that bullcrap with my DC.

Me too.

+2

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I majored in political science. I didn’t have any “coveted” internships during undergrad. The summer after my junior year, I lived at home after coming back from study abroad and just hung out. I ended up at a top 10 university for grad school, did 10 years as an analyst at a very coveted fed agency and currently work for a bulge bracket bank (aka Citigroup, JP Morgan, etc.).

What you major in, or where you intern, is much less important than how you leverage your skills in the workplace.

You probably graduated in the 90s when hiring practices were wildly different. And you are the rare exception to the rule — most BB IB folks had that covered junior summer internship (which, BTW, are given out 14 months before the start date now).

I graduated in 2009.

I’m a 2009 grad who worked in MBB (and did a summer in finance) and you and I both know your path is the exception not the rule. I think OP is crazy for the record, but anecdotes like yours are incredibly misleading. Can you get in on a non traditional path? Of course. But, it’s very hard.

This entire thread has been full of naysayers throwing a bunch of exceptions who just got lucky. OP, you're right to make your DD take the internship instead of the camp counselor job -- all these people throwing out non-traditional paths into high-paying jobs are deluded.

This thread is full of OP and a couple cronies who may or may not be OP, based upon how they write near-exactly like her, dismissing and pooh-poohing the MANY people with similar young adult paths (and no, they aren’t all rich and no, they didn’t all grow up “connected”) to this beleaguered daughter who have careers that don’t line up with OP’s idiotic gloom and doom predictions.