DH in contact with an ex gf

[Anonymous]

Last night out of the blue, DH told me his ex called him. They played some catch up. I didn't get upset with him, but I'm really bothered by it. This ex has always sort of been the needy type and would contact him all the way back to when DH and I were dating. I never said anything then, worried that I would come off as insecure. She finally stopped after we got married and now we are expecting.

He was really open about their conversation-- he told me she was calling for advice as she had just broken up with someone and she was starting to see a new guy she liked and wanted to know from my husband the good and the bad of living with someone. It felt odd to me, she would want to reach out to an ex, especially a married one instead of a friend, and I felt bothered he would discuss our personal lives with someone he had such a history with. I admit because things haven't been the best between us lately that I felt compelled to dig in and look at his iwatch and found they had talked for about half an hour while he was at work. He never answers me when he's at work and when he does have the time to answer his phone, he can barely give me more than two mins. I also saw in his call logs he had called her a few weeks ago. There was also a notification that she had sent him a photo recently, but I wasn't able to see it on his watch. Should I be worried? Should I concern him about my findings. Am I overreacting? I've been having the worse pregnancy hormones lately.

[Anonymous]

unless you husband is gay i wouldn't feel comfortable with this. who the fuck wants to listen to their ex gf bitch about another man

[Anonymous]

Are people really that insecure? Between the 2 of us, DH and I are regularly in touch with 3 exes. None of those relationships worked out, but the people we've dated do share similar interests and professional aspirations, so we stay on good terms.

[Anonymous]

I don't think its a big deal.

[Anonymous]

Another good reason to not get an iWatch.

[Anonymous]

Absent more info or evidence of something, not a big deal. Both DH and I have occasional friendly contact with a couple of exes.

[Anonymous]

Wounded bird trick. Tell him to get rid of her.

[Anonymous]

He told you about it. Was it a one time thing? I'd be uncomfortable about this leading to them fostering a deep friendship or something but not a one off weird contact.

[Anonymous]

While I agree with PP, his ex sounds wackadoo with poor boundaries. It's very odd that she contacted him for relationship advice.

I would tell your DH how you're feeling about their phone call - not as an attack, but as a way to acknowledge that things haven't been great between you and you're feeling a bit vulnerable. Don't tell him about the photo - focus on your relationship.

[Anonymous]

You need to be worried about the fact that things aren't good, and you're snooping. He's already told you he's in contact with her.. Youre the one looking for more.

[Anonymous]

Not a big deal. I'm in contact with 2 significant exes and it's a non-issue. One married before I did and the other is still single. I swap kid stories with one and hear all about dating from the other. It's genuine friendship in both cases -- we are adults with common interests and a shared past.

Even if the ex does happen to have impure motives, I'd bet DH will be reminded of why they broke up in the first place. Don't fight needy with needy.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't worry about it. I called an ex recently and we broke up 5 years ago. Some girls just need more closure. They probably just ended up talking about her love life. Not a big deal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't worry about it. I called an ex recently and we broke up 5 years ago. Some girls just need more closure. They probably just ended up talking about her love life. Not a big deal.

ew

[Anonymous]

I'm really good friends with my ex. It isn't romantic at all. I'm lucky that my husband is understanding because I'm the tyoe of person who only has a few close friends, and he's one of them. If my husband asked me to cut ties, I absolutely would, but personally I think it's better to just let people be friends with who they want, so long as all involved are respectful of your relationship.

[Anonymous]

Not a big deal but note that he called her first. Don't let him pit you against her in some sort of imaginary contest for his love. Allegedly you've already won.