What happened to the babysitter thread?

[Anonymous]

I posted last night but can't find it

[Anonymous]

Probably moved to the nanny forum.

[Anonymous]

I don't see it there either.

[Anonymous]

I hate that babysitting threads posted here get moved to the nanny forum.

When this forum was combined with nannies, a simple question like "how much to pay my 14 year old sitter in NOVA" would get flooded by nannies posting crazy amounts like $20.00/hour.

After the nannies got moved to their own thread, similar threads by moms answered by moms would get more realistic responses.

Also, threads like the babysitter hiding boys in the garage from last night would get more useful and appropriate traffic from the parenting forums than from the nanny forums.

That is more of a neighborhood relationship/kid safety/dealing with teenagers issue than a babysitting/nanny issue, and should have stayed where OP posted it. The feedback from other parents is sometimes more relevant than the limited and very specific group of the nanny forum.

[Anonymous]

This is OP and I agree with PP. however I don't even see it in the nanny forum. I was really looking for feedback! What gives?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is OP and I agree with PP. however I don't even see it in the nanny forum. I was really looking for feedback! What gives?

I posted a response.

I think you should tell the parents.

If babysitter hadn't come clean with you and those boys tried to sneak out of the house, especially if they waited until after you fell asleep, there could have been a real tragedy for you and the boys.

The sitter doesn't know if your household has a gun, or a baseball bat or whatever self defense mechanism you or you husband might have used if you woke up to the sound of your garage door opening and someone sneaking through your house.

She came clean (good thing!) but she needs a little follow up with her parents.

It wasn't too long ago that a dad shot and killed a boy his teen daughter snuck into her room through her window. He heard the noise late at night, went into the room and caught tyeboy either in bed with the girl or under the bed. The girl panic and lied and said she didn't know who he was and dad shot him thinking he was an intruder.

Babysitter could have caused a major tragedy by her dumb choice.

[Anonymous]

I don't see why babysitter threads need to go to the nanny forum always.

I think a lot of the responses on these thread are written by nannies that want to make more money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is OP and I agree with PP. however I don't even see it in the nanny forum. I was really looking for feedback! What gives?

Jeff has stated before that he can't move posts between the regular forums and the nanny forums- so posts that belong in nanny forums just get deleted.
I'm hoping that you will repost (in the nanny forum), b/c I am now intrigued!

[Anonymous]

I posted too, and I apologize if it was my reply that got the post deleted. I didn't think what I had written was inappropriate and it wasn't a troll.

I am the poster who caught my sitter in a lie, she had allowed my children to watch way more tv than allowed, which wasn't the main issue. The main issue was she had told the kids to lie and not tell mommy she had allowed the extra movie, and to "keep it a secret, that it was their little secret". It was that catch phrase and that action of instructing my children to keep a secret between babysitter and child that set me off. I felt that using that terminology and asking for secrets sets a terrible precedent, I think you can let your imagination go from there. In no way do I think the sitter would be inappropriate or abusive with my kids, but you should never ask a child to keep secrets.

So how this related to OP was that I told the babysitter, over the phone, exactly why I couldn't hire her anymore. I explained that as a parent, a child should never be told by an older person/adult/teacher/babysitter, etc. to keep a secret from their parents, regardless of how minor that secret might seem (like watching more movies). I may sound over the top and nuts, but I feel very strongly about this, why is for another thread. I felt the babysitter needed to know this, because she could do it again with other kids and potentially could be accused of something. I did not do it in front of the parents. But if she had been caught having friends over, I would have. You need to tell her and her parents. It's is for her own good.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't see why babysitter threads need to go to the nanny forum always.

I think a lot of the responses on these thread are written by nannies that want to make more money.

I agree.

Nannying is a profession that is very different than a neighbor teen babysitting or being a mother's helper.

A teen babysitting involves neighborhood relationships, sometimes parenting or mentoring of the teen sitter, peer and social issues (for example, My 12 year old is too old for a sitter but isn't mature enough to manage his younger siblings safely...how do you handle sitters?) If I post a question like that (or like OPs sitter sneaking boys into the house) I want feedback from other moms who might have experienced something similar and not a bunch of nannies on the much less trafficked by moms nanny board. Also, tye only parents on the nanny boards are parents of very young kids looking for nannies or people with nannies who have questions about things like taxes or are having nanny related issues. Parents of teens or older kids aren't over there, but often parents of teens are who posters like OP needs to reach. The audience over on tye nanny boards is a very specific and limited group and is just not visited by most of the parents over on the parenting boards of dcum.

Jeff, I hett if you polled your users, most of dcum would feel the same way, that babysitting questions posted in tue parenting boards should stay put. They usually don't belong in the nanny boards.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is OP and I agree with PP. however I don't even see it in the nanny forum. I was really looking for feedback! What gives?

Jeff has stated before that he can't move posts between the regular forums and the nanny forums- so posts that belong in nanny forums just get deleted.
I'm hoping that you will repost (in the nanny forum), b/c I am now intrigued!

But OPs post did jot belong in the nanny forum. If anything it belonged in the teen and tweens forum. It should never have been flagged or reported by anyone for movement.

[Anonymous]

Sorry for the typos!

[Anonymous]

OMG I agree! We are just getting into the babysitting world and I would appreciate parent perspectives. I don't even venture into the nanny forums. Babysitting is a separate topic where the perspective of parents is paramount.

[jsteele]

We have a specific babysitting forum in the nanny section. We are pretty hardline about this topic. You can choose not to use the nanny forums, but if you post here, it will likely be deleted.

[Anonymous]

jsteele wrote:We have a specific babysitting forum in the nanny section. We are pretty hardline about this topic. You can choose not to use the nanny forums, but if you post here, it will likely be deleted.

But why?

Most people who are posting about babysitting issues want to hear from other parents and maybe parents of teens, not nannies.

And very few parents and certainly not parents of teens are interested in the nanny forums.

This seems like a strange issue to be hardline about. Would you possibly consider poling your audience in the parenting forums to see what they actually want? Babysitting, and ESPECIALLY questions like OPs with the teen sitter sneaking in boys and hiding them in the garage are an issue where someone needs feedback from parents and not nannies. Wouldn't letting the posters choose where topics such as these need to be based off who they want input from make much more sense tuan deleting every thread that happens to mention the word "babysitter"?

To me that is the equivalent of moving the thread titled "My inlaws won't shut up about Donald Trump and it's driving me to drink until Christmas with the inlaws is over" to the politics board simply because it mentions Donald Trump, when the real issue/question is about relationships with the inlaws and should stay in the family relationship forum where the OP posted.

If my memory serves me correctly (and it might not) you started the separate nanny site based on suggestions and input mostly from the nannies. Why not consider input from the parents on this issue so they can get the most valuable feedback from the people whose experience and input they are seeking (other parents)?