Bikini area hair removal?

[Anonymous]

I don't believe this but according to my 14 year old DD, she's the only girl in her grade that doesn't remove all the hair from her bikini area. I don't allow her too, as I find this recent trend of complete baldness wildly inappropriate, but is it really as widespread as she says it is? I might reconsider my rule if she isn't doing it to be inappropriate.

[Anonymous]

I think teens should be able to shave whatever part of their body they want. How do you control what she does with a razor in the shower? Are you watching her?

[Anonymous]

I would use this as an opportunity to talk about why people groom differently, the pros of hair vs. no hair, porn and why it is not a realistic portrayal of women or relationships and why she wants to go bald down there in general.

Then, I would let her do what she wants to do. If she wants to shave it all off, how does it really impact you anyway? Now, if she wants to wax-- which can get really pricey, she may need to get a job. I would not pay for my daughter to wax down there either.

The bush vs. no bush brings out a lot of heated debate on DCUM. I am 42 and like my bush. I do trim it and shave a bit to keep it neat and tidy. I think it is hypocritical to shave legs and armpits, but judge people (like your daughter) for wanting to go bare.

[Anonymous]

I think it also depends on how hairy she is. At 14 didn't grow anything that didn't stay covered by my panties - now at over 40, I think a plain bikini wax only lasts a week! I am very glad not a girl who plays volleyball or running or any other sport that has short shorts! Going bare might just be easier for her instead of trimming for the clothes she wears.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think teens should be able to shave whatever part of their body they want. How do you control what she does with a razor in the shower? Are you watching her?

Of course I don't watch her. Honor system.

Anonymous wrote:I think it also depends on how hairy she is. At 14 didn't grow anything that didn't stay covered by my panties - now at over 40, I think a plain bikini wax only lasts a week! I am very glad not a girl who plays volleyball or running or any other sport that has short shorts! Going bare might just be easier for her instead of trimming for the clothes she wears.

As of her last physical a few months ago, it was all easily covered by her panties.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think teens should be able to shave whatever part of their body they want. How do you control what she does with a razor in the shower? Are you watching her?

Of course I don't watch her. Honor system.

Anonymous wrote:I think it also depends on how hairy she is. At 14 didn't grow anything that didn't stay covered by my panties - now at over 40, I think a plain bikini wax only lasts a week! I am very glad not a girl who plays volleyball or running or any other sport that has short shorts! Going bare might just be easier for her instead of trimming for the clothes she wears.

As of her last physical a few months ago, it was all easily covered by her panties.

You are picking the wrong battle. are you going to punish her if you find out she's waxed it all off? Just tell her "I want you to listen to why I think women and teens shouldn't take off all their pubic hair. Blahblah blah. Do you understand? Great. Now go do whatever you want with yours. I just wanted you to know my feelings on this. If you want to get it waxed, please let me know so I can help you find a reputable salon."

[Anonymous]

Honestly, let her do what she wants. Why does it matter to you if she shaves down there or not? Let her do what she's comfortable with. I believe I started shaving "down there" when I was 15.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, let her do what she wants. Why does it matter to you if she shaves down there or not? Let her do what she's comfortable with. I believe I started shaving "down there" when I was 15.

+1. This really isn't a battle worth fighting and one that you really can't control. It's her body and her comfort level that's important. It doesn't impact anyone else.

[Anonymous]

omg her body, her choice!!! I wouldn't pay for bikini wax or laser hair removal, but if she wants to shave it, why not??

[Anonymous]

It's her body. It has nothing to do with sex. Sorry but I don't know a girl under the age of 30 who doesn't go bare. I started shaving around 16. I have no statistics but I believe your daughter and her analysis of her peers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't believe this but according to my 14 year old DD, she's the only girl in her grade that doesn't remove all the hair from her bikini area. I don't allow her too, as I find this recent trend of complete baldness wildly inappropriate, but is it really as widespread as she says it is? I might reconsider my rule if she isn't doing it to be inappropriate.

I would just tell her that there are precautions she needs to take if she wants to shave. Ask her to let you know if she ever wants to so you can get her the proper tools.

I agree with the PPs that this is one of those things you can't really control - you can give your opinion (and even what you prefer), but that is it.

[Anonymous]

If she wants to shave let her shave.

[Anonymous]

IMO, her body, her choice. How can I expect my child to believe that she has the right to have boundaries and make decisions about her own body, if I tell her when she is or isn't allowed to remove her own body hair or make other similar aesthetic decisions herself?

My mom was very controlling about my appearance through my teen and college years (more so than it sounds like you are, but still) and it caused me some problems for a while as a young adult.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't believe this but according to my 14 year old DD, she's the only girl in her grade that doesn't remove all the hair from her bikini area. I don't allow her too, as I find this recent trend of complete baldness wildly inappropriate, but is it really as widespread as she says it is? I might reconsider my rule if she isn't doing it to be inappropriate.

How is someone's choice about how much hair to leave on their own body "inappropriate"? And how could she be doing it "to be inappropriate"? I don't understand your concern here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't believe this but according to my 14 year old DD, she's the only girl in her grade that doesn't remove all the hair from her bikini area. I don't allow her too, as I find this recent trend of complete baldness wildly inappropriate, but is it really as widespread as she says it is? I might reconsider my rule if she isn't doing it to be inappropriate.

DD ahs been removing it all since she first got it, around 11. Yes, it is the norm in her age group. It is not about boys or sex, it's just a ridiculous new grooming standard. As PPs said, I may not like it, and I've mentioned ingrown hairs and yeast infections, but it's her body and it's important for her to feel that she owns it.