Half of British women reach age 30 without having a child

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would have put off having kids until age 50 if possible. My husband and I met at age 24 and had an awesome decade of living for ourselves. Finally decided it was time and had kids at 36 and 38. No regrets. Pregnancies, deliveries, and recoveries were a breeze. All my friends had kids in their 30s. The only friend who needed IVF was back when we were in our 20s. We are now in our early 40s and several friends are having their third kid.

Angry grandma, I know it’s fun to validate your life choices by imagining desperate aging women realizing it’s too late, but lots of us put off childbearing with absolutely no consequences. My body snapped back right away too.

Same for me except I had my kids a little earlier. The best part is that as my kids fly the nest, I have my interesting job to dive into which keeps me sharp and engaged (and making money).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I haven’t met a woman with kids who had them under thirty in years. I can’t even recall. Years ago, like people in the 90s maybe a few. And that girl from high school.

My sister did, she has 3 and started at 25. She got a master's at an ivy in her 20s too. She's always done things early and well. Interestingly, she needed a lot of science to get pregnant the first 2 times though. You can never be sure how things will go or control everything.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't know why scare quotes were used for "shacking up"? It is when you move in with a man you're not married to. It became extremely common in the last couple of decades, including multiple times on Sex and the City. And then women wonder why 'peter pan' men won't commit—why buy the cow when you get the milk for free.

Sex and the City mainstreamed and glamorized shacking up to the masses. Additionally, it was subversive in making the conservative waspy gal, Charlotte's, life implode for only moving in after marriage and a full commitment. She was boring and safe and the marriage was awful. All the older millennials and Gen Xers emulated the other iconic characters, they were such fun and edgy feminist rebels. Now the lucky ones have one or two IVF babies, while many remain unmarried and childless. Quite sad how destructive pop culture can be.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't know why scare quotes were used for "shacking up"? It is when you move in with a man you're not married to. It became extremely common in the last couple of decades, including multiple times on Sex and the City. And then women wonder why 'peter pan' men won't commit—why buy the cow when you get the milk for free.

Sex and the City mainstreamed and glamorized shacking up to the masses. Additionally, it was subversive in making the conservative waspy gal, Charlotte's, life implode for only moving in after marriage and a full commitment. She was boring and safe and the marriage was awful. All the older millennials and Gen Xers emulated the other iconic characters, they were such fun and edgy feminist rebels. Now the lucky ones have one or two IVF babies, while many remain unmarried and childless. Quite sad how destructive pop culture can be.

[phone]

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't know why scare quotes were used for "shacking up"? It is when you move in with a man you're not married to. It became extremely common in the last couple of decades, including multiple times on Sex and the City. And then women wonder why 'peter pan' men won't commit—why buy the cow when you get the milk for free

I have never understood why women love this phrase so much. You realize you are the cow in this scenario?

And the implication that men only want sex and women don't, and that women want a committed relationship and men don't, is so old-fashioned and insulting.

Everyone I knew lived together before marriage. The one exception is a couple that got divorced - the others are all together. So I don't see a justification for these 1950s views...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't know why scare quotes were used for "shacking up"? It is when you move in with a man you're not married to. It became extremely common in the last couple of decades, including multiple times on Sex and the City. And then women wonder why 'peter pan' men won't commit—why buy the cow when you get the milk for free

I have never understood why women love this phrase so much. You realize you are the cow in this scenario?

And the implication that men only want sex and women don't, and that women want a committed relationship and men don't, is so old-fashioned and insulting.

Everyone I knew lived together before marriage. The one exception is a couple that got divorced - the others are all together. So I don't see a justification for these 1950s views...

They are 2020 views. Yours are the views that are old.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't know why scare quotes were used for "shacking up"? It is when you move in with a man you're not married to. It became extremely common in the last couple of decades, including multiple times on Sex and the City. And then women wonder why 'peter pan' men won't commit—why buy the cow when you get the milk for free.

Sex and the City mainstreamed and glamorized shacking up to the masses. Additionally, it was subversive in making the conservative waspy gal, Charlotte's, life implode for only moving in after marriage and a full commitment. She was boring and safe and the marriage was awful. All the older millennials and Gen Xers emulated the other iconic characters, they were such fun and edgy feminist rebels. Now the lucky ones have one or two IVF babies, while many remain unmarried and childless. Quite sad how destructive pop culture can be.

You keep referring to IVF babies like they're somehow distinguishable from babies conceived the old fashioned way. What's up with that?

Signed, Lawyer who got pregnant the first month of trying (twice!) in her 30s

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't know why scare quotes were used for "shacking up"? It is when you move in with a man you're not married to. It became extremely common in the last couple of decades, including multiple times on Sex and the City. And then women wonder why 'peter pan' men won't commit—why buy the cow when you get the milk for free.

Sex and the City mainstreamed and glamorized shacking up to the masses. Additionally, it was subversive in making the conservative waspy gal, Charlotte's, life implode for only moving in after marriage and a full commitment. She was boring and safe and the marriage was awful. All the older millennials and Gen Xers emulated the other iconic characters, they were such fun and edgy feminist rebels. Now the lucky ones have one or two IVF babies, while many remain unmarried and childless. Quite sad how destructive pop culture can be.

You keep referring to IVF babies like they're somehow distinguishable from babies conceived the old fashioned way. What's up with that?

Signed, Lawyer who got pregnant the first month of trying (twice!) in her 30s

NP aren’t IV babies twice as likely to have autism as naturally conceived children and more like to have sub-70 IQ scores? I think they are more likely to have cerebral palsy too.

[Anonymous]

Plus birth complications, peanut allergies, on and on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't know why scare quotes were used for "shacking up"? It is when you move in with a man you're not married to. It became extremely common in the last couple of decades, including multiple times on Sex and the City. And then women wonder why 'peter pan' men won't commit—why buy the cow when you get the milk for free.

Sex and the City mainstreamed and glamorized shacking up to the masses. Additionally, it was subversive in making the conservative waspy gal, Charlotte's, life implode for only moving in after marriage and a full commitment. She was boring and safe and the marriage was awful. All the older millennials and Gen Xers emulated the other iconic characters, they were such fun and edgy feminist rebels. Now the lucky ones have one or two IVF babies, while many remain unmarried and childless. Quite sad how destructive pop culture can be.

You keep referring to IVF babies like they're somehow distinguishable from babies conceived the old fashioned way. What's up with that?

Signed, Lawyer who got pregnant the first month of trying (twice!) in her 30s

NP aren’t IV babies twice as likely to have autism as naturally conceived children and more like to have sub-70 IQ scores? I think they are more likely to have cerebral palsy too.

Not when you control for multiples. I had to do IVF consent modules that went over this. I also got married young by DC standards and still had fertility issues.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Plus birth complications, peanut allergies, on and on.

OMG NOT PEANUT ALLERGIES!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Plus birth complications, peanut allergies, on and on.

OMG NOT PEANUT ALLERGIES!!!

I mean, they do seem pretty scary. A lot of those nut allergies can kill kids if they are exposed even slightly and are not treated within minutes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Careerism is a fake excuse for delaying kids. Two young women in our office are 26 and 28, make a little over $100,000 a year, and just took 6 months paid maternity leave. Their career isn't going to be hurt what so ever.

In some careers, like mine, it's hard to work 60-80 hours with a baby. Why would you assume all jobs are like those in your office?

Wtf even, PP? Are you even a working mom?

[Anonymous]

The cope from barren women in this thread could power the entire planet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The cope from barren women in this thread could power the entire planet.

Aw, sweetie, it doesn't hold a candle to your obvious bitterness and rage. Sorry you wasted your life.