How rampant is cheating in the military?

[Anonymous]

One of my friends married a guy who is joining the navy seals today. She doesn't seem concerned at all but I am thinking about the cheating culture in the military. Is it as bad as people say?

[Anonymous]

I've heard it's pretty common for spouses of military members on deployment.

[Anonymous]

Judging from my experience, yes. I have not met any military member yet who either has not cheated or has not been cheated on. But maybe it's just my experience.

[Anonymous]

Probably, or people wouldn't say it...it doesn't mean that he has to fall into it though. If he is a decent guy he will keep his junk in his pants, if he doesn't he probably wasn't marriage material to begin with.

[Anonymous]

Its pretty common. So easy to fuck a complete stranger, in another country, that finds you desirable for protecting your country.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Judging from my experience, yes. I have not met any military member yet who either has not cheated or has not been cheated on. But maybe it's just my experience.

It might be the times too.

We were military for 8 years pre 9/11 and guys who wanted to be family men were and guys who wanted to chase tail were single and did just that. There weren't the crazy long multiple deployments either that see spouses cheating on the soldier either. Sure cheating happened but it wasn't my experience that it was as prevalent as now. I still have family in the military included some newly graduated.

[Anonymous]

My husband's ex cheated on him.

[Anonymous]

I think it's no different that the civilian world. Some people cheat, some don't.

[Anonymous]

I don't see a cheating culture, but my dh is a pretty highly ranked officer. There are more consequences for an officer who cheats, as far as I can tell.

[Anonymous]

I'm a woman who was in the military, and there is tons of infidelity. There were very few men I knew who didn't cheat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Judging from my experience, yes. I have not met any military member yet who either has not cheated or has not been cheated on. But maybe it's just my experience.

It might be the times too.

We were military for 8 years pre 9/11 and guys who wanted to be family men were and guys who wanted to chase tail were single and did just that. There weren't the crazy long multiple deployments either that see spouses cheating on the soldier either. Sure cheating happened but it wasn't my experience that it was as prevalent as now. I still have family in the military included some newly graduated.

They werent family men. They just didnt get caught

[Anonymous]

I went to a medical school in the Caribbean, and I was warned about the same thing. It's really interesting what people will do if they are together for lengthy periods of time (away from home) in a relatively confined environment. People were cheating on their SO's left and right. The Mistress/Manstress?? typically had no qualms with it either, in the sense that if the SO was flying down to visit they would go incognito for a week or 2 until the the coast was clear. Ahh...so many stories.

[Anonymous]

My Dad was Navy. From what I could tell as a child ( and what people have told me as an adult), there was usually one cheater in the marriage. Usually the husband (when my Dad was in, there weren't women on the ships) cheated when he was deployed. Or the wife cheated while the husband was deployed with the husbands that weren't deployed at the time.

My Uncle was Army Special Forces. Often got sent on secret missions that he couldn't tell my Aunt about--not where he was going or when he'd be back. Turns out he used this to be able to carry on a 10 year affair.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't see a cheating culture, but my dh is a pretty highly ranked officer. There are more consequences for an officer who cheats, as far as I can tell.

Don't kid yourself. High ranking officers cheat all the time. They just have to be careful who they cheat with. No one who is enlisted. But someone else's wife, not a problem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think it's no different that the civilian world. Some people cheat, some don't.

I don't think it's nearly as simple as that. You have to factor in the high stress environment + being in a completely different country + basically knowing that your SO won't find out about it (probably...well at least not initially). I don't know if this has ever been studied (kind of hard since most people won't admit to an affair) but I wouldn't be surprised if infidelity is much more common in the armed forces /long distance in general.