Anonymous wrote:OP your bias is really strong here, and that's ok.
Your kid would be fine in the kid's room. He wants to spend time with his older cousins, which he will get to do at the reception; he CAN'T do that at the ceremony. But he will get the chance to spend time with younger cousins, who might look up to him like he does to his older cousins soon. It sounds like a total win-win, objectively.
Elderly cousins bday party: I agree this is an important event. But if the pull here is that he means something to you and you want to spend time with him, I'd use this as the impetus to schedule a trip to actually spend time with him. A big family party will get you a short conversation or two and an appearance, not actual quality time.
Totally agree with all of this.
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