Do you let your kids physically fight?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes. They also play with their dad like this.

You married a Neanderthal

More like a stallion

[Anonymous]

Wrestling is normal and fun.

We implement an immediate stop when someone says no.

Teaches respect for consent plus is an outlet for completely normal and fun physicality

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have boys the same ages as yours and yes, I let them wrestle/playfight/tackle each other. Yes, it inevitably ends with someone getting hurt or upset. The thing is, I don't think I can stop it unless I keep them fully separated all the time. Boys this age (at least mine and their friends) are irresistibly drawn to physical play. The best I can do is set ground rules to make sure no one is truly injured in the process.

You sound like one of those “boys will be boys” sexist types. If your girls were ‘irresistibly drawn to you physical play’ would you stop them and tell them to behave themselves? I know you would it’s a rhetorical question. So why different rules because they have a penis? Shouldn’t they be held to the same behavioral standard “we don’t hit or fight” that girls are held to?

Nice try, but I wrestle with my nieces as much as with my sons. With the usual caveats: no face, no weapons besides pillows, and everyone needs to be having fun.

Totally normal and healthy play.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Surprised at the number of people who think this is okay.

so very low brow and low class

Meh, least I won't have kids that grow up needing constant therapy.

My boys wrestled for an hour last night, then threw socks at a ceiling fan like 20 minutes past their bedtime. I didn't make a big stink about it. My parenting philosophy is simple, stolen from George Carlin:

-"Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things"

They're only kids once, and if they're having good fun, being siblings? Then so be it. If that makes me 'low class' then honestly, IDGAF.

You will be paying for it one way or another when they are older - maybe not therapy (because tough guys don’t do therapy) - more likely drug rehab or suicide. You know the majority of suicides are white middle aged men - most of whom never learned to control emotions or even talk about them. Play fighting is just an immature way to cope.

Hang on - what? If I let my sons wrestle, they will die by suicide? That seems like quite a leap. (You mean the same kids who cry openly at Toy Story?).

My kids wrestle AND openly discuss/have emotions. It’s a false dichotomy.

[Anonymous]

Roughhousing - yes. Sword type fighting - yes. Physically fighting - no. It never ends well and someone is screaming and mad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Surprised at the number of people who think this is okay.

so very low brow and low class

Says the mother of girls.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Dad here. I'd let them do this, but if they start hurting each other and screaming or they break something, I'm joining in and they're both going to lose.

This sums up perfectly why children do best in a home with both a mom and a dad. The male/female different points of view are critical.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Dad here. I'd let them do this, but if they start hurting each other and screaming or they break something, I'm joining in and they're both going to lose.

This sums up perfectly why children do best in a home with both a mom and a dad. The male/female different points of view are critical.

+1

[Anonymous]

This entire thread sums up why there are so many whiny, ill equipped adults (both male and female)... some of the parents on here coddle their kids preventing them from properly developing and becoming regular adults... kids like to wrestle, both boys and girls. Nothing wrong with letting them do it as long as it's safe.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This entire thread sums up why there are so many whiny, ill equipped adults (both male and female)... some of the parents on here coddle their kids preventing them from properly developing and becoming regular adults... kids like to wrestle, both boys and girls. Nothing wrong with letting them do it as long as it's safe.

Where's the line between roughhousing and trying to solve problems with violence?

Sometimes it's very thin-to-nonexistent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Surprised at the number of people who think this is okay.

so very low brow and low class

Meh, least I won't have kids that grow up needing constant therapy.

My boys wrestled for an hour last night, then threw socks at a ceiling fan like 20 minutes past their bedtime. I didn't make a big stink about it. My parenting philosophy is simple, stolen from George Carlin:

-"Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things"

They're only kids once, and if they're having good fun, being siblings? Then so be it. If that makes me 'low class' then honestly, IDGAF.

You will be paying for it one way or another when they are older - maybe not therapy (because tough guys don’t do therapy) - more likely drug rehab or suicide. You know the majority of suicides are white middle aged men - most of whom never learned to control emotions or even talk about them. Play fighting is just an immature way to cope.

Are you ok? Have you met elementary school age boys? Watch recess or really any soccer/football/sports game and you will notice the boys love touching / wrestling each other. They often greet eachother by wrestling or fake punching. We are talking about play fighting and wrestling here, not real fighting out of anger. Do you maybe not see the difference?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This entire thread sums up why there are so many whiny, ill equipped adults (both male and female)... some of the parents on here coddle their kids preventing them from properly developing and becoming regular adults... kids like to wrestle, both boys and girls. Nothing wrong with letting them do it as long as it's safe.

Where's the line between roughhousing and trying to solve problems with violence?

Sometimes it's very thin-to-nonexistent.

Who said anyone is solving problems? Literally they do it for fun!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This entire thread sums up why there are so many whiny, ill equipped adults (both male and female)... some of the parents on here coddle their kids preventing them from properly developing and becoming regular adults... kids like to wrestle, both boys and girls. Nothing wrong with letting them do it as long as it's safe.

Where's the line between roughhousing and trying to solve problems with violence?

Sometimes it's very thin-to-nonexistent.

Apparently someone studied this and adult women who didn't grow up with brothers aren't able to distinguish between real and play fighting. The rest of us (men and women with brothers) are able to tell a lot more accurately.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/growing-friendships/201506/do-boys-need-rough-and-tumble-play

[Anonymous]

I can’t believe there’s so many people who say no. I would never let my kids truly ‘fight’ each other, but I have three boys and they love to do stuff like this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This entire thread sums up why there are so many whiny, ill equipped adults (both male and female)... some of the parents on here coddle their kids preventing them from properly developing and becoming regular adults... kids like to wrestle, both boys and girls. Nothing wrong with letting them do it as long as it's safe.

Where's the line between roughhousing and trying to solve problems with violence?

Sometimes it's very thin-to-nonexistent.

Apparently someone studied this and adult women who didn't grow up with brothers aren't able to distinguish between real and play fighting. The rest of us (men and women with brothers) are able to tell a lot more accurately.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/growing-friendships/201506/do-boys-need-rough-and-tumble-play

I grew up with only a sister and have two boys same age as the OP. It’s not a hard concept to distinguish between rough and tumble play and true fighting. If one is coming at the other in anger, that’s not rough and tumble play and you put a stop to it.

Rough and tumble play is seen across mammalian species. It’s normal! If I had boys that didn’t ever want to do it I would think that is strange.