PE class for kindergarteners - turning into a disaster

[Anonymous]

Is the classroom teacher or other school employee present for “gym class”? This setup seems wildly inappropriate, even for a small private school. Kids left alone with an unsupervised volunteer? If the teacher is present, I’d take this issue up with him or her.

I really would not trust a random mom’s assessment of my child’s behavior in general. PE teachers have appropriate training in child development, classroom management etc and this person presumably does not. That doesn’t mean I don’t believe the behavior isn’t problematic, it likely is. But possibly not in the way a random parent may think.

I would not talk to admin or “tattle” as in a small private school this will likely cause more social problems than it would be worth.

I’d continue to work closely with the classroom teacher on assessing his behavior etc. and let the gym class stuff go. I’d be tempted to just pick him up early as he likely isn’t getting anything out of it anyway. That time of the day will also usually be the worst for him behaviorally.

I’d also put him in a rec sport or two of some sort and see how he does (if his behavior is problematic you can always remove him) ….those will likely be at times where you can get a better read on his behavior/skills.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:It sounds a lot like you're not getting your child the help he needs. Work on that, OP.

I am trying! I take him to speech, OT twice a week, see a therapist, saw a psychiatrist for meds, talk to the teacher, got a neuropsych eval. What else can I do if I"m not doing enough, pick him up early from school? I have talked to him over and over and over about PE. If the kids are doing leg lifts you do them too. I can't control him when he's there. I appreciate your kind comment that I am not getting the help that he needs but I am trying and spending all kinds of money i don't have.

None of the things you listed will teach the child to follow directions. Get the kid a 1:1 to work on basic skills. This won’t get better on it’s own.

This is a new diagnosis, right? You're doing a lot, and I'm sure it's overwhelming.

But I agree that getting a 1:1 would be helpful here.

The parent gossiping is completely in the wrong. But you've just got to keep working with your kid. He'll get there.

A 1:1 for a 5 year old with ADHD who won't program in some after school PE class?!?!?!?! This is absolutely nuts.

OP if you need childcare, find a SAHM who has a backyard and a black lab and pay them to pick your kid up. The school day is over, it is not fair to your son to ask for more programming. He is not a little adult.

For the ADHD, you need to push out the behavior so he learns to read on time. You don't need to fight (or medicate) him to be able to pay attention from 8am to 4pm literally tomorrow.

Why is the expectation that a SAHM wants to take care of someone else's kid? They are home for their kids. Stop being a user.

This is NOT an after school class. It is part of the school day. This is obv a private school, but the school is obligated to provide a teacher for every class during the school day. This “parent volunteer” teaching a class is nonsense- even if it is gym.

Op it is a public school. We have a few classes for kids that are funded by pfa: art, stem lab, and Pe for kindergarten. They do get paid but I know it’s a small amount, like less than minimum wage. Most of the parents don’t make it through the year and wind up quitting for whatever reason. Anyway, he does listen and follow directions in the regular classroom (with a lot of effort and positive reinforcement) it’s just this Pe at the end of the day. I would go and pull him out early but I am working then. He just got the diagnosis so I haven’t had a meeting with the school yet.

Sounds like he is doing reasonably well in the classroom so I’d just keep doing what you are doing, and keep working with his teacher.

PE can be more problematic for some ADHD kids (I have one) due to the more unstructured nature of the class. Add in an unqualified “teacher” (not criticizing that parent at all- wonderful for them to volunteer) and i can see why things would not go well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:It is insane that this random mom is allowed to “teach.” I would go to the principal and explain that this is a train wreck and she is now relating info about your kid and ask whether she is subject to FERPA, and if not, why is she allowed to teach.

And let me add, PE is EXACTLY where young children should burn off their energy and run around. Assuming he isn’t eloping, pushing other kids, etc — just let the freaking kid run around the room.

He's not bothering anyone. He's just running around the tree with the other ADHD kid in the class, they chase each other, while the rest of the kids are standing in a circle doing arm circles or leg kicks or whatever. He gets in trouble for now following directions and listening. I think that this volunteer (I believe she gets a small stipend actually) gives him a grade because on his report card there is a grade for PE.

You are doing your child a HUGE disservice by not teaching them to follow directions and writing this off as oh it’s not bothering anyone.

I am the most authoritative parent on this forum. The kid needs to program to learn to read, write and do arithmetic. At the end of they day all of his "pay attention" neurotransmitters are gone. This is not an age-appropriate ask. Back in the day when kids got their knuckles hit with a ruler for not paying attention education did not start until age 7 and recess was unstructured. Nobody was asking a 5 year old to do downward facing dog in 1900. Modern education has gone off the rails.

Pay attention neurotransmitters isn’t a thing for one, but you already know that. Programming a kid is also not a thing, hopefully you also know that. Also arm circles are not downward facing dog.

Bottom line-if the child cannot pay attention and copy basic 1-step motor imitation in a group with peers by kindergarten it’s a HUGE issue. It indicates a lot of underlying deficits and if they don’t get fixed now you’ll have much bigger problems in 5 years. You do whatever you want but it’s an absolute disservice to your kid to let that continue unchecked.

dp. The kid doesn't have "a lot of underlying decifits." Many kids with ADHD absolutely can "copy basic 1-step motor imitation in a group with peers" and still struggle with PE at the end of the day. That's because the problem is not their ability to "copy basic 1-step motor imitation in a group with peers." This pp is right that OP's kid may very well do great in a weekend martial arts class.

[Anonymous]

OP. Please ignore the parents who are saying that you are doing something wrong. You are doing your best and your child will improve with time, attention, and resources. My son was completely out of control in kinder. I took counselling sessions to manage his behavior, so his behavior at home improved quickly. It took until 2nd grade until his behavior calmed down at school. His brain needed to mature a bit. He is now in 11th grade and he is the calmest, gentlest kid you will ever meet.

You may need to remove him from the class for the time being, but you are a great mom and he will be fine in the long run.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is insane that this random mom is allowed to “teach.” I would go to the principal and explain that this is a train wreck and she is now relating info about your kid and ask whether she is subject to FERPA, and if not, why is she allowed to teach.

And let me add, PE is EXACTLY where young children should burn off their energy and run around. Assuming he isn’t eloping, pushing other kids, etc — just let the freaking kid run around the room.

He's not bothering anyone. He's just running around the tree with the other ADHD kid in the class, they chase each other, while the rest of the kids are standing in a circle doing arm circles or leg kicks or whatever. He gets in trouble for now following directions and listening. I think that this volunteer (I believe she gets a small stipend actually) gives him a grade because on his report card there is a grade for PE.

You are doing your child a HUGE disservice by not teaching them to follow directions and writing this off as oh it’s not bothering anyone.

I am the most authoritative parent on this forum. The kid needs to program to learn to read, write and do arithmetic. At the end of they day all of his "pay attention" neurotransmitters are gone. This is not an age-appropriate ask. Back in the day when kids got their knuckles hit with a ruler for not paying attention education did not start until age 7 and recess was unstructured. Nobody was asking a 5 year old to do downward facing dog in 1900. Modern education has gone off the rails.

Pay attention neurotransmitters isn’t a thing for one, but you already know that. Programming a kid is also not a thing, hopefully you also know that. Also arm circles are not downward facing dog.

Bottom line-if the child cannot pay attention and copy basic 1-step motor imitation in a group with peers by kindergarten it’s a HUGE issue. It indicates a lot of underlying deficits and if they don’t get fixed now you’ll have much bigger problems in 5 years. You do whatever you want but it’s an absolute disservice to your kid to let that continue unchecked.

Of course pay attention neurotransmitters are a thing! Where do you think the 40-hour workweek came from? If an adult's productivity caps out between 40 and 60 hours a week, what is a kid's limit?

Kiddo does need to learn to follow directions, but not at age 4 or 5, and not after having already been in school for 6 hours.

I would bet a million dollars ADHD kiddo would program for weekend martial arts class because it would be more appealing to him and because his brain would have time to recover from the school week

You’re a nut job. God help any children you teach.

You're the nut. The 19th century schoolmarm with the ruler and the sour expression would think medicating and shaming a 5 year old to do PE is absolutely crazy-town. Honestly, its actually pretty much just emotional abuse, making this kid think something is wrong with him. HE'S A KID.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It sounds a lot like you're not getting your child the help he needs. Work on that, OP.

I am trying! I take him to speech, OT twice a week, see a therapist, saw a psychiatrist for meds, talk to the teacher, got a neuropsych eval. What else can I do if I"m not doing enough, pick him up early from school? I have talked to him over and over and over about PE. If the kids are doing leg lifts you do them too. I can't control him when he's there. I appreciate your kind comment that I am not getting the help that he needs but I am trying and spending all kinds of money i don't have.

None of the things you listed will teach the child to follow directions. Get the kid a 1:1 to work on basic skills. This won’t get better on it’s own.

This is a new diagnosis, right? You're doing a lot, and I'm sure it's overwhelming.

But I agree that getting a 1:1 would be helpful here.

The parent gossiping is completely in the wrong. But you've just got to keep working with your kid. He'll get there.

A 1:1 for a 5 year old with ADHD who won't program in some after school PE class?!?!?!?! This is absolutely nuts.

OP if you need childcare, find a SAHM who has a backyard and a black lab and pay them to pick your kid up. The school day is over, it is not fair to your son to ask for more programming. He is not a little adult.

For the ADHD, you need to push out the behavior so he learns to read on time. You don't need to fight (or medicate) him to be able to pay attention from 8am to 4pm literally tomorrow.

Why is the expectation that a SAHM wants to take care of someone else's kid? They are home for their kids. Stop being a user.

Yeah, quit telling people to "find a SAHM." Especially for a kid with ADHD who has had enough for the day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our school has a PE class for kindergarteners that the PTA pays for, so it's basically a mom who has no background in teaching that volunteers to do it. In my case, it's one of my friends that Ive known a few years. My son turns out to be a little bit of a hellion in this PE class. He doesn't listen, runs around playing and doesn't do the arm circles or whatever the rest of the kids are doing. A few weeks ago he was diagnosed with ADHD. I had him evaluated because he struggled to sit still on the rug during class, although it's improved over the course of the year. PE is just getting worse though. Anyway, now the PE teacher is avoiding me and telling the other parents that he's not listening during class. Should I confront her and tell her about his diagnosis? I have been hesitant because I felt like it wasn't her business. Can

I don’t get it. PTA is “paying” for this gym class, yet some random mom is “volunteering” to teach it? This makes no sense. If it is part of the school day, they need to provide a paid and professional teacher to teach it. If it is a volunteer, then call it a supervised recess hour and let the kids play. How is your child in other classes OP?

I wonder if it was supposed to be supervised recess and some DCUM over-achiever thought she could "improve" it with arm swings and downward facing dogs

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It sounds a lot like you're not getting your child the help he needs. Work on that, OP.

I am trying! I take him to speech, OT twice a week, see a therapist, saw a psychiatrist for meds, talk to the teacher, got a neuropsych eval. What else can I do if I"m not doing enough, pick him up early from school? I have talked to him over and over and over about PE. If the kids are doing leg lifts you do them too. I can't control him when he's there. I appreciate your kind comment that I am not getting the help that he needs but I am trying and spending all kinds of money i don't have.

None of the things you listed will teach the child to follow directions. Get the kid a 1:1 to work on basic skills. This won’t get better on it’s own.

This is a new diagnosis, right? You're doing a lot, and I'm sure it's overwhelming.

But I agree that getting a 1:1 would be helpful here.

The parent gossiping is completely in the wrong. But you've just got to keep working with your kid. He'll get there.

A 1:1 for a 5 year old with ADHD who won't program in some after school PE class?!?!?!?! This is absolutely nuts.

OP if you need childcare, find a SAHM who has a backyard and a black lab and pay them to pick your kid up. The school day is over, it is not fair to your son to ask for more programming. He is not a little adult.

For the ADHD, you need to push out the behavior so he learns to read on time. You don't need to fight (or medicate) him to be able to pay attention from 8am to 4pm literally tomorrow.

Why is the expectation that a SAHM wants to take care of someone else's kid? They are home for their kids. Stop being a user.

Yeah, quit telling people to "find a SAHM." Especially for a kid with ADHD who has had enough for the day.

I am a SAHM. You don't know people's financial situation. There are moms looking for work like that for extra pocket money because that is the only type of work they can do while they have kids. I said to ***PAY*** them not to bum off them.

[Anonymous]

Parent of two sons: anyone who expects 5yos stand in place in a circle during gym class at the end of the kindergarten day should get their head examined.

The problem here lies with the 'teacher' - first she needs to have age-appropriate expectations and organize activities that will enable the kids to have fun and get exercise after what is a very long day of having to focus on school for most 5yos. She also should never complain about any of the students to the other parents. She's untrained and unprofessional - I would take that to the principal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Parent of two sons: anyone who expects 5yos stand in place in a circle during gym class at the end of the kindergarten day should get their head examined.

The problem here lies with the 'teacher' - first she needs to have age-appropriate expectations and organize activities that will enable the kids to have fun and get exercise after what is a very long day of having to focus on school for most 5yos. She also should never complain about any of the students to the other parents. She's untrained and unprofessional - I would take that to the principal.

+1000

I also agree with the pp who suggested the intention of this class was more likely along the lines of “supervised recess”.

[Anonymous]

I would just smile, say sorry we’ll talk to him and forget about it. Not your problem she’s not equipped to teach

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would just smile, say sorry we’ll talk to him and forget about it. Not your problem she’s not equipped to teach

Same. Sounds like the school needs to hire an extra gym teacher. I cannot believe you can raise PTA and sent to pay a parent volunteer for their time. That seem unethical

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Send him to a real school. If he has ADHD, this school cannot handle it.

This.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s highly inappropriate of the parent volunteer PE teacher to talk about other children to other parents. I would politely let her know that you are willing to discuss any concerns she has but that you would appreciate her coming to you directly. If it happens again I would go to the school leader.

PS: this is why most schools don’t allow this! Teaching insider everyone, especially an untrained teacher!

Yeah, this is the dumbest thing I have ever heard of. It just shows how little people think of teachers, particularly PE teachers. They seem to think anyone can just step in to that role with no background and training. Guess what? It's harder than you think! FAFO in action.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It sounds a lot like you're not getting your child the help he needs. Work on that, OP.

I am trying! I take him to speech, OT twice a week, see a therapist, saw a psychiatrist for meds, talk to the teacher, got a neuropsych eval. What else can I do if I"m not doing enough, pick him up early from school? I have talked to him over and over and over about PE. If the kids are doing leg lifts you do them too. I can't control him when he's there. I appreciate your kind comment that I am not getting the help that he needs but I am trying and spending all kinds of money i don't have.

None of the things you listed will teach the child to follow directions. Get the kid a 1:1 to work on basic skills. This won’t get better on it’s own.

This is a new diagnosis, right? You're doing a lot, and I'm sure it's overwhelming.

But I agree that getting a 1:1 would be helpful here.

The parent gossiping is completely in the wrong. But you've just got to keep working with your kid. He'll get there.

A 1:1 for a 5 year old with ADHD who won't program in some after school PE class?!?!?!?! This is absolutely nuts.

OP if you need childcare, find a SAHM who has a backyard and a black lab and pay them to pick your kid up. The school day is over, it is not fair to your son to ask for more programming. He is not a little adult.

For the ADHD, you need to push out the behavior so he learns to read on time. You don't need to fight (or medicate) him to be able to pay attention from 8am to 4pm literally tomorrow.

Why is the expectation that a SAHM wants to take care of someone else's kid? They are home for their kids. Stop being a user.

Yeah, quit telling people to "find a SAHM." Especially for a kid with ADHD who has had enough for the day.

I am a SAHM. You don't know people's financial situation. There are moms looking for work like that for extra pocket money because that is the only type of work they can do while they have kids. I said to ***PAY*** them not to bum off them.

That is NOT the only type of work they can do while they have kids. It’s the type they WANT to do.