10 year old cannot go upstairs alone..

[Anonymous]

My 10 year old son is afraid to go around the home alone. He does stay alone by himself for a couple of hours at home when I have run errands and he watches TV until we get back. He thinks twice and has trouble to go to another room by himself.. To be specific..
He cannot go upstairs alone during the day or night. he was like this all the time..
I always thought he will outgrow (still believe)..but kind of wanted to see if any other boys are like this.

I ask him what is he afraid of? But never get an answer from him. He says he is not scared of anything. We do not watch much TV/movies at home. Never watched any horror movies. But he does play lot of games on tablet. He has lot of good friends and socializes well.

DH is least worried, but I am waiting for the day when he can do things like going to his room to bring his books/toys by himself, without one of us helping him.

[Anonymous]

This is very bizarre to me. My 9 yo DS is not afraid of going anywhere in our house yet I would never leave him alone for a couple of hours while I'm out. If your child can't go upstairs to his own room during the day time, how are you comfortable leaving him at home without an adult??

[Anonymous]

Yea, I don't think this is normal. Therapy? I have a 10 and 6 yr old, and neither have this kind of problem, even going down into the finished basement, as long as they turn on the lights before they go down.

[Anonymous]

Maybe you should get him checked for OCD. People with OCD have extreme anxiety that feels alleviated by the following of certain rituals and rules. The most talked about is the hand washing ritual, but not going upstairs by yourself could also be a manifestation of that. The thought process of someone with OCD goes something like this: "If I go upstairs by myself something terrible will happen to my family the next time we leave the house. If I don't go upstairs by myself, nothing terrible will happen to my family the next time we leave the house."

[Anonymous]

Mine is like this at 8.5 but he's growing out of it. I was the same as a kid. Very overactive imagination. Just gently encourage, even reward, when he does it. Once he gets used to it, he will be fine.

[Anonymous]

He has probably seen scary things on TV when you're gone. Kids have big imaginations, he'll grow out of it. Maybe someof the video games are scary.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He has probably seen scary things on TV when you're gone. Kids have big imaginations, he'll grow out of it. Maybe someof the video games are scary.

I agree with this. You day he doesn't watch much tv, but then he watches a couple hours while you are gone. You have no idea what kind of scary stuff he is watching. I was terrified if being in my playroom alone after I watched Poltergeist around the same age.

[Anonymous]

Agree that some form of OCD should at least be investigated.

[Anonymous]

I would refuse to "help" a ten year old fetch books or toys from upstairs be he's afraid. He can get over it or do without.

[Anonymous]

A relative had this around 9 or 10 years of age. The news of shootings really got to her and she couldn't be alone. She saw someone, and seemed to feel a lot better after a few months.

[Anonymous]

My DC has come home having heard scary stories from others or having read something at school that scared him later.

I don't think your son needs therapy at all, but I would try to get to the bottom of what's scaring him so you can address it rationally.

[Anonymous]

Ten is a bit old, but it is normal for kids to want their parents near them at home. They grow out of it.

[Anonymous]

A lot of people overreacting here. Your son may be the nervous type, but he hardly has some kind of disorder.

We had a kid that really wasn't comfortable going upstairs by himself until age 12 or so. He's a perfectly normal teenager now. His brother is now 10, and is the same way. I'm not the least bit worried about it - it is something they outgrow.

[Anonymous]

My 8 year old DS is like his. He is diagnosed with anxiety but this is not his only issue. This is one of the things we are working to overcome with cognitive behavioral therapy. Doubt have any other concerns about your son or is it just this one issue?

[Anonymous]

DS, who has OCD tendencies (ADHD and Asperger's as well) is reluctant to go upstairs by himself, but I will force him to, ie tell him to go brush his teeth, or fetch me a book, etc.

He's a compulsory hand-washer, *has* to gargle three times after brushing his teeth, *has* to close to toilet lid when walking into a bathroom with open toilet lid. Slowly, by gently but relentless exposure to different things he doesn't like to do, I am reducing his OCD.