10 year old cannot go upstairs alone..

[Anonymous]

PP again, forgot to mention that DS is 10 like your son.

[Anonymous]

Your son probably heard or saw something scary. My heart still races if I'm in a bathroom or small room in the pitch dark

Can You try to relate to him to maybe get him to open up about why he's scared? He probably feels silly telling you why and letting him know you get freaked out too might Ease him

Also, what's the lighting situation like? Can you add a lamp somewhere to make a dark area brighter?

[Anonymous]

I was afraid of The Clutching Lady beneath all beds until well past age 30. You just have to adapt.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was afraid of The Clutching Lady beneath all beds until well past age 30. You just have to adapt.

I was afraid to go into the bathroom when I was 18, while I was reading IT by Stephen King.

I had heard all kinds of ghost stories from older kids in the neighborhood. Someone had written "goon" on the rafter down in the basement, over top the next to the last step. My friend told me if I stepped on that step, the goons would come running around the corner to get me. That scared me for years. I still skip over the next to the last step in every house I'm in....

[Anonymous]

OP here.. Thanks for all suggestions.
I do think it is related to something he has seen or read. I used to be the same. He is more relaxed if there is some music playing or if TV is running in the house.

Also he will go upstairs or around the house by himself if he really really needs to.
I started leaving him at home alone starting 15 - 30 mins at first. And now i am comfortable to let him stay for 2-3 hours.

[Anonymous]

My son is naturally cautious and was like that around 10-- I would generally not go out of my way to accommodate him but I didn't make a big deal out of forcing him to go upstairs by himself. He grew out of it in a year or two.

[Anonymous]

It's normal!!!

When the lights aren't on upstairs my almost 10-year old DS is the same way. All kids are different. Never bothers my 7-year old.

As a kid my older siblings were chickens and I was younger by 3-4 years and the one that wanted the door shut and lights out (no night light) as a kid. They'd sneak in my room when they were scared.

Granted- they'd seen the Exorcist (one of the scariest movies of all time)and I wasn't allowed yet.

It can be an active imagination.

Why do we need to psychoanalyze every kid nowadays????

[Anonymous]

10:40 here. I can't believe how many people jump to post "he must have OCD, anxiety....". It's ridiculous. I see it thread after thread.

Doesn't anyone here remember seeing a scary movie or hearing a scary ghost story as a kid? I remember being afraid of my clown doll after seeing Poltergeist. I remember imagining that sharks were swimming around my bed when I was a kid (Jaws). I remember turning off the light then running to get under the covers because I felt afraid of the dark for no particular reason.

It's all normal and not a big deal. He'll grow out of it. In the meantime, people need to stop assigning labels to their kids who have imaginations.

[Anonymous]

I was the same way until 12 or so, no psych issues that I am aware of. I especially hated crossing in front of the front door alone. I actually didn't need someone with me, but I hated it. Anyway, with more comfidence and independence It just wore away until i didnt think twice about it
excuse typos, on phone

[Anonymous]

My 12 year old DD was the same way - then we got a dog and she goes everywhere with and without her.

[Anonymous]

dd is Amex, 9yrs, a,way been ths way. Won't typicallly go to the playroom downstairs with us. At night, doesn't want to use te anthropomorphic without us. I'm not too concerned.

[Anonymous]

My DS who is almost 10 is the same way. And he is very successful in every way but these fears. My older DD has never been afraid of anything ever. This almost worries me more. She thinks nothing can happen to her.

[Anonymous]

Op I have a nine year old. We live in a condo that has one floor only. His bedroom is in the back of the house at the end of the hallway. He doesn't want to go to his room and play alone because he's scared. He'll go back there and grab stuff and bring it out by himself with no problem, but he usually won't go back there and stay for very long. I also leave him home alone while I run to the store or a few errands (never longer than an hour and a half yet, but I'm sure by the time he's 10 I will). He stays home alone because he prefers it over coming with me to do boring errands. This started with 15 minute trial periods when he was 8 and built up. We have about 20 channels that include at least 5 PBS channels, some foreign language channels and NBC, so no scary movies or anything. I think it's normal and I am not worried about my ds at all. I just try not to make a big deal about it and I also tell him I remember being scared of stuff at his age. I've also told him some stories of things my brothers did to exacerbate my fears and have a little laugh about it with him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My 10 year old son is afraid to go around the home alone. He does stay alone by himself for a couple of hours at home when I have run errands and he watches TV until we get back. He thinks twice and has trouble to go to another room by himself.. To be specific..
He cannot go upstairs alone during the day or night. he was like this all the time..
I always thought he will outgrow (still believe)..but kind of wanted to see if any other boys are like this.

I ask him what is he afraid of? But never get an answer from him. He says he is not scared of anything. We do not watch much TV/movies at home. Never watched any horror movies. But he does play lot of games on tablet. He has lot of good friends and socializes well.

DH is least worried, but I am waiting for the day when he can do things like going to his room to bring his books/toys by himself, without one of us helping him.

My nephew was the same way. He got there eventually in his own time. Why can't your DC play downstairs. My children have never played quietly in their room, they use it almost exclusively for sleeping. They hang intro the family room. They are 16and 18.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
DS, who has OCD tendencies (ADHD and Asperger's as well) is reluctant to go upstairs by himself, but I will force him to, ie tell him to go brush his teeth, or fetch me a book, etc.

He's a compulsory hand-washer, *has* to gargle three times after brushing his teeth, *has* to close to toilet lid when walking into a bathroom with open toilet lid. Slowly, by gently but relentless exposure to different things he doesn't like to do, I am reducing his OCD.

Is this the suggested medical approach to reducing OCD? My dd has similar compulsions, just a few, and seem minor so i dont worry about them. But there is OCD in my husbands family