Me too. I entered K as a 4 year old and the social (not academic) deficits followed me through my school career. I redshirted my summer kid with zero regrets. It’s worked out beautifully. |
+1 just like the parents in my neighborhood who thought they bought into a good school district only to get upset hearing some kids go to private |
LOL |
OP says in the first post that they would have redshirted too if she had known people in her school were redshirting Spring birthdays. It doesn't sound like they have less resources than other parents in their local school. |
I think it's basically an old wives' tale. People have somehow convinced themselves that redshirting is an advantage (it's generally not), and if other people are doing it, then they want to do it too or they get FOMO. I dont think there's anything more to it than that. |
I think that supports my point. The parents who *did* red shirt didn’t wait to see what other children were doing. Their decision was based on an optimal environment for their child, with no consideration of resources. |
Her decision was based on what the majority of people were doing. To assume resources were a consideration, when it's never mentioned, is a stretch. Parents who redshirt are concerned primarily about their kids fitting in socially. Sounds like OP was too. |
I think this is the dichotomy that creates problems. It's not so much redshirters v. non-redshirters. It's people who are angling for an advantage for their kids versus people who want a healthy childhood environment. I fall in the second camp and think it's both redshirters and non-redshirters who are seeking advantages who create the conflict. The advantage seekers who redshirt do it specifically because they want their kids to be oldest, to be leaders, to have an edge in sports and academics if possible. The advantage seekers who don't redshirt feel threatened by this and freak out about it, and these people fight with each other. On the other side, those of us who just want healthy educational environments don't fight with each other whether we redshirt or not, because we have the same goal -- a positive environment. My kid isn't redshirted but I don't have any issue with redshirted kids as long as the goal is for all the kids to get what they need in the classroom. All the redshirted kids I know are great (I only know a few) and positive additions to the classroom. I don't get the feeling their parents are trying to get them ahead, only that they were worried they weren't ready for K so held them back a year. NBD. That first group will never be happy no matter what the rule is because they are all in competition with each other and all deeply insecure and everything is motivated by trying to get their kid to the front of the line. They are also the people who lose their minds over age cut offs in summer swim and other sports. They are crazy! |
Same. But candidly, the obsessed anti-redshirt parent are incapable of looking holistically like this. |
Had no idea so many parents were obsessed with how old their kids are compared to other kids at their school. Seems kinda ridiculous. |
Insightful comment. I actually would add another group that’s a problem: the equality seekers who somehow believe redshirting gives an advantage. |
+1 And the saddest thing about this is: elementary school (and extracurriculars) should NOT be about competition in the first place! Kids learn at different paces, and sports should be for fun, socialization & exercise. |
It really is bizarre. I’m convinced these are the same parents that are obsessing about which reading level their kid is vs others, or who is “better” at their sport etc. In elementary school. Why not just focus on your own child and how he/she is progressing and developing? |
PP here and I totally agree. I feel like I talk about this with my kids every few months. It's just life. There is always someone faster, smarter, better in some way than you. All you can do is focus on your own progress and work on the stuff that is important to you. |
It's just my opinion based on my experience, as I said. I say it because I don't want people reading this to think they need to redshirt their kids because they have selective mutism. Do any experts recommend redshirting a kid for this? |