People who ruin neighborhoods (like tkpk) by putting their kids in private school

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is this takoma park dc? Because if so, you’ve also got public charters causing this problem.

Takoma park MD

Is Takoma Park not part of the down county consortium for HS? Many of those kids have long commutes. Private school is an easy target, but you're not thinking too hard on this.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:The fact that these kids get into Yale from their so-called "inadequate" public schools is a testament to the fact that our fears of public schools are irrational.

If public school was so great for those kids, why not attend a public university too?

Many public university graduates are very successful and make a lot of money. I have a classmate that went to Frostburg State, where she met her husband. They are doing very well and have an enormous house. I'm not sure what your point is.

Exactly, so why bash private schools k-12 and then turn around and send your kid to private U?

Your college ends up on your resume for life and, even decades after graduation, it can play a role in whether you get a job or not. Not so with elementary, middle, and high schools.

Nope. Private k-12 matters far more in terms of college preparation, future dating & friendships, becoming acculturated, socialization and poise. Your kid who went to a LMC public school will forever be an interloper an Ivy. Hopefully they are prepared enough to finish a useful major, but that’s unlikely. Kids who went to independent schools dominate the Greek life, secret society & eating club scenes no matter where they go to college.

Ew, this is precisely why I didn't send my kids to private. PP, we do not share the same values.

HHI of 7 figures, BTW.

Also gross to tell us your HHI.

Well it's not like I announce it at parties. This is anonymous discussion about our choices, and by indicating that I avoid snobby wealthy people, I will inevitably get the response, "Oh, you're just jealous that you can't afford to send your kid to my swanky private school." I was just heading that one off at the pass.

Right, you send your kids to surgically segregated publics instead. So much more noble to do that!

What does surgically segregated mean?

Very carefully drawn boundaries to keep out poor people/subsidized housing/rentals.

Well that quite the assumption.

Our elementary school is 60% economically disadvantaged and 70% Black and brown. Our (unaccredited) middle school has similar stats, and one of the three feeder schools (40% of the school) is horribly hyper-segregated and draws almost entirely from a public housing court. I have kids in both schools.

I'm (secretly) paying for the bus for the school field trip to Luray Caverns. Much better use of my money than the private schools that try to visit our school on their "empathy tour." Our students are not a zoo exhibit to teach you to count your blessings. Sorry that your bubble creates a deficit in this area.

It is child abuse to send your children to horribly failing schools when you have a 7-figure HHI. Enjoy your social experiment while your kids still speak to you.

Yes, living your espoused values of equality, charity, and civic duty is one of the worst things for children. Much better to worship status and materialism.

Your kids are going to resent you.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:The fact that these kids get into Yale from their so-called "inadequate" public schools is a testament to the fact that our fears of public schools are irrational.

If public school was so great for those kids, why not attend a public university too?

Many public university graduates are very successful and make a lot of money. I have a classmate that went to Frostburg State, where she met her husband. They are doing very well and have an enormous house. I'm not sure what your point is.

Exactly, so why bash private schools k-12 and then turn around and send your kid to private U?

Your college ends up on your resume for life and, even decades after graduation, it can play a role in whether you get a job or not. Not so with elementary, middle, and high schools.

Nope. Private k-12 matters far more in terms of college preparation, future dating & friendships, becoming acculturated, socialization and poise. Your kid who went to a LMC public school will forever be an interloper an Ivy. Hopefully they are prepared enough to finish a useful major, but that’s unlikely. Kids who went to independent schools dominate the Greek life, secret society & eating club scenes no matter where they go to college.

Ew, this is precisely why I didn't send my kids to private. PP, we do not share the same values.

HHI of 7 figures, BTW.

Also gross to tell us your HHI.

Well it's not like I announce it at parties. This is anonymous discussion about our choices, and by indicating that I avoid snobby wealthy people, I will inevitably get the response, "Oh, you're just jealous that you can't afford to send your kid to my swanky private school." I was just heading that one off at the pass.

Right, you send your kids to surgically segregated publics instead. So much more noble to do that!

What does surgically segregated mean?

Very carefully drawn boundaries to keep out poor people/subsidized housing/rentals.

Well that quite the assumption.

Our elementary school is 60% economically disadvantaged and 70% Black and brown. Our (unaccredited) middle school has similar stats, and one of the three feeder schools (40% of the school) is horribly hyper-segregated and draws almost entirely from a public housing court. I have kids in both schools.

I'm (secretly) paying for the bus for the school field trip to Luray Caverns. Much better use of my money than the private schools that try to visit our school on their "empathy tour." Our students are not a zoo exhibit to teach you to count your blessings. Sorry that your bubble creates a deficit in this area.

It is child abuse to send your children to horribly failing schools when you have a 7-figure HHI. Enjoy your social experiment while your kids still speak to you.

Yes, living your espoused values of equality, charity, and civic duty is one of the worst things for children. Much better to worship status and materialism.

Your kids are going to resent you.

It’s a huge benefit later in life to be able to say that you are the product of public schools, especially if you get involved in politics.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The fact that these kids get into Yale from their so-called "inadequate" public schools is a testament to the fact that our fears of public schools are irrational.

If public school was so great for those kids, why not attend a public university too?

Many public university graduates are very successful and make a lot of money. I have a classmate that went to Frostburg State, where she met her husband. They are doing very well and have an enormous house. I'm not sure what your point is.

Exactly, so why bash private schools k-12 and then turn around and send your kid to private U?

Your college ends up on your resume for life and, even decades after graduation, it can play a role in whether you get a job or not. Not so with elementary, middle, and high schools.

Nope. Private k-12 matters far more in terms of college preparation, future dating & friendships, becoming acculturated, socialization and poise. Your kid who went to a LMC public school will forever be an interloper an Ivy. Hopefully they are prepared enough to finish a useful major, but that’s unlikely. Kids who went to independent schools dominate the Greek life, secret society & eating club scenes no matter where they go to college.

Ew, this is precisely why I didn't send my kids to private. PP, we do not share the same values.

HHI of 7 figures, BTW.

Also gross to tell us your HHI.

Well it's not like I announce it at parties. This is anonymous discussion about our choices, and by indicating that I avoid snobby wealthy people, I will inevitably get the response, "Oh, you're just jealous that you can't afford to send your kid to my swanky private school." I was just heading that one off at the pass.

Right, you send your kids to surgically segregated publics instead. So much more noble to do that!

What does surgically segregated mean?

Very carefully drawn boundaries to keep out poor people/subsidized housing/rentals.

Well that quite the assumption.

Our elementary school is 60% economically disadvantaged and 70% Black and brown. Our (unaccredited) middle school has similar stats, and one of the three feeder schools (40% of the school) is horribly hyper-segregated and draws almost entirely from a public housing court. I have kids in both schools.

I'm (secretly) paying for the bus for the school field trip to Luray Caverns. Much better use of my money than the private schools that try to visit our school on their "empathy tour." Our students are not a zoo exhibit to teach you to count your blessings. Sorry that your bubble creates a deficit in this area.

It is child abuse to send your children to horribly failing schools when you have a 7-figure HHI. Enjoy your social experiment while your kids still speak to you.

Yes, living your espoused values of equality, charity, and civic duty is one of the worst things for children. Much better to worship status and materialism.

Your kids are going to resent you.

That's not what the research bears out. https://www.amazon.com/Price-Privilege-Advantage-Generation-Disconnected/dp/006059585X

Look, I get it, our primitive brain is focused on providing our kids with all of the advantages to survive and pass on our genes. It's just worthwhile to examine whether the things we're valuing and the environment we're choosing are actually accomplishing what we hope.

[Anonymous]

I live in Silver Spring (couldn't afford Takoma Park home prices or private school for 2 kids, lol). There are a couple Catholic schools nearby and families purposely buy in the surrounding neighborhoods to be close to the school. How is that ruining the neighborhoods? I seriously don't understand your logic. The other (few) families I know who have kids in private all started at the public schools (and often the other siblings still attend public), but for one reason or another the kid just was not getting what they needed there. A couple moved during the pandemic because the Catholic school was actually in person while MCPS was still virtual, and just decided to stay for stability.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:More of a vent, but i am uttterly frustrated by people with money who move into nice MC neighborhoods like tkpk or silver spring with relatively good schools to get bigger houses and then choose to put their precious kids in private schools.

We are trying to build a community and bring the schools up and these people create a bad trend of pulling a whole group of UMC kids out of the public schools because they cannot handle the diversity and challenges of public schools. All while claiming to be left leaning and to have a social compass. But that is pure white flight. It is depressing. And they dont even seem to see how political and impactful their choice is.

I really wish they stayed out of my city and went to live next to the private schools they send their kids to.

Translation: We are strivers who worked our butts off and clawed our way into what we thought was a premier neighborhood. We envisioned we and our children would make fast friends with upper middle class and rich new neighbors, parents and classmates. Read social climb. We quickly discovered we are actually on a lower rung and nobody with deep pockets sends their kid to what we thought were excellent public schools — and thus, they don’t socialize with us or our kids.

lol petty good translation there

This is to die for.
I live in a small, old house in a middle-class neighborhood and send my kids to the private school in the UMC town a few miles away. I think my way was smarter.

Meh, now do the person who stretched to afford private school only to find the parents are cliquey and uninterested in anyone without money/status, the teachers and admin prioritize the big donors and VIPs to everyone else's detriment, and you constantly have to explain to your kid why they can't do the same activities, vacations, and shopping sprees as their friends. Oh and they can't get into a good college because the college counselors can only recommend so many kids and oh yeah, those spots are going to the kids of the donors and VIPs

Oy vey, post some more corny stereotypical tropes you nutbag. The ruthless status obsessed cliques dominate the UMC public schools. Everyone is warm and inviting across the HHI spectrum at privates.

Haha, good one

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:More of a vent, but i am uttterly frustrated by people with money who move into nice MC neighborhoods like tkpk or silver spring with relatively good schools to get bigger houses and then choose to put their precious kids in private schools.

We are trying to build a community and bring the schools up and these people create a bad trend of pulling a whole group of UMC kids out of the public schools because they cannot handle the diversity and challenges of public schools. All while claiming to be left leaning and to have a social compass. But that is pure white flight. It is depressing. And they dont even seem to see how political and impactful their choice is.

I really wish they stayed out of my city and went to live next to the private schools they send their kids to.

Translation: We are strivers who worked our butts off and clawed our way into what we thought was a premier neighborhood. We envisioned we and our children would make fast friends with upper middle class and rich new neighbors, parents and classmates. Read social climb. We quickly discovered we are actually on a lower rung and nobody with deep pockets sends their kid to what we thought were excellent public schools — and thus, they don’t socialize with us or our kids.

lol petty good translation there

This is to die for.
I live in a small, old house in a middle-class neighborhood and send my kids to the private school in the UMC town a few miles away. I think my way was smarter.

Meh, now do the person who stretched to afford private school only to find the parents are cliquey and uninterested in anyone without money/status, the teachers and admin prioritize the big donors and VIPs to everyone else's detriment, and you constantly have to explain to your kid why they can't do the same activities, vacations, and shopping sprees as their friends. Oh and they can't get into a good college because the college counselors can only recommend so many kids and oh yeah, those spots are going to the kids of the donors and VIPs

Oy vey, post some more corny stereotypical tropes you nutbag. The ruthless status obsessed cliques dominate the UMC public schools. Everyone is warm and inviting across the HHI spectrum at privates.

Haha, good one

It just entirely depends on the environment at that particular school. I hated my experience at my selective all-girls private k-12, mostly because it was unfriendly and not at all nurturing. I was very inclined to send DC to public. My DH loved his private school experience and advocated strongly for it for our DC. It's been a very welcoming and warm environment for our children. Glad I let my DH talk me into it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You fleed to the suburbs. You should’ve sent your kid to your local DCPS. Traitor.

Ha. That's fair. Although I never lived in DC but had i first moved to DC you are right that i would probably have moved out to the suburbs and betrayed the local school. I guess that's why i see the potential impact here as so depressing.

But I got it out of my system, vent over. I can see absolutely noone agrees with me. I am still sad over this situation and still wished more people cared about public schools. But I will try to not come back to this thread.

Don’t go- I just got here and totally get what you’re saying and feel the same way! And this is the only place you can vent. And it IS the case that parents fleeing public schools doesn’t bode well for the neighborhood or the school. It’s the same in Chevy Chase and Bethesda though…

What about out in Gaithersburg and Derwood etc- those families mostly go to their neighborhood schools, I bet. It has something to do with class/race- I don’t know what though!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I get what you’re saying, OP. People are absolutely allowed to be disappointed at this. It reminds me of Kemp Mill in Silver Spring, which is a well-off suburban neighborhood that has a bad elementary school because so many of the locals send their kids to private Jewish schools. When the middle class parents stop caring and participating, schools suffer.

This didn’t strike me as anti-Semitic. This is just an example of what happens when many neighborhood families choose- for whatever reason!- to go private. You need most families who live around the school to care about the school!

[Anonymous]

Another interesting example- not sure whether or not it supports OP- would be Woodmoor. This neighborhood close to TP is full of kids- about half of whom go to the local Catholic school and half who go public. It’s interesting bc both schools are right there in this kind of insular neighborhood full of kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm in Takoma Park, and honestly I'm a little confused by OP's post. Most of the families in the community use the public schools. It seems like what OP is upset about is the relatively small slice of TkPk that is in the Historic District and therefore the wealthiest sliver of a diverse city.

Those families don't tend to be fleeing for ritzy privates for the social stature. More often, they have some 'horseshoe theory' beliefs around government schools stifling the creativity of children and preparing them for a life of mindless capitalism.

That's actually a different value set, and therefore a different discussion than the folks arguing that private school is better because it grants you entry into the halls of power.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:More of a vent, but i am uttterly frustrated by people with money who move into nice MC neighborhoods like tkpk or silver spring with relatively good schools to get bigger houses and then choose to put their precious kids in private schools.

We are trying to build a community and bring the schools up and these people create a bad trend of pulling a whole group of UMC kids out of the public schools because they cannot handle the diversity and challenges of public schools. All while claiming to be left leaning and to have a social compass. But that is pure white flight. It is depressing. And they dont even seem to see how political and impactful their choice is.

I really wish they stayed out of my city and went to live next to the private schools they send their kids to.

You go ahead and “be the change.” The quality of my kid’s education is more important than living up to your fantasy. Bottom line is, we’re not going to sacrifice our kids for the potential benefit of kids coming 20 years later.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:The fact that these kids get into Yale from their so-called "inadequate" public schools is a testament to the fact that our fears of public schools are irrational.

If public school was so great for those kids, why not attend a public university too?

Many public university graduates are very successful and make a lot of money. I have a classmate that went to Frostburg State, where she met her husband. They are doing very well and have an enormous house. I'm not sure what your point is.

Exactly, so why bash private schools k-12 and then turn around and send your kid to private U?

Your college ends up on your resume for life and, even decades after graduation, it can play a role in whether you get a job or not. Not so with elementary, middle, and high schools.

Nope. Private k-12 matters far more in terms of college preparation, future dating & friendships, becoming acculturated, socialization and poise. Your kid who went to a LMC public school will forever be an interloper an Ivy. Hopefully they are prepared enough to finish a useful major, but that’s unlikely. Kids who went to independent schools dominate the Greek life, secret society & eating club scenes no matter where they go to college.

Ew, this is precisely why I didn't send my kids to private. PP, we do not share the same values.

HHI of 7 figures, BTW.

Also gross to tell us your HHI.

Well it's not like I announce it at parties. This is anonymous discussion about our choices, and by indicating that I avoid snobby wealthy people, I will inevitably get the response, "Oh, you're just jealous that you can't afford to send your kid to my swanky private school." I was just heading that one off at the pass.

Right, you send your kids to surgically segregated publics instead. So much more noble to do that!

What does surgically segregated mean?

Very carefully drawn boundaries to keep out poor people/subsidized housing/rentals.

Well that quite the assumption.

Our elementary school is 60% economically disadvantaged and 70% Black and brown. Our (unaccredited) middle school has similar stats, and one of the three feeder schools (40% of the school) is horribly hyper-segregated and draws almost entirely from a public housing court. I have kids in both schools.

I'm (secretly) paying for the bus for the school field trip to Luray Caverns. Much better use of my money than the private schools that try to visit our school on their "empathy tour." Our students are not a zoo exhibit to teach you to count your blessings. Sorry that your bubble creates a deficit in this area.

It is child abuse to send your children to horribly failing schools when you have a 7-figure HHI. Enjoy your social experiment while your kids still speak to you.

Yes, living your espoused values of equality, charity, and civic duty is one of the worst things for children. Much better to worship status and materialism.

Your kids are going to resent you.

It’s a huge benefit later in life to be able to say that you are the product of public schools, especially if you get involved in politics.

We haven’t had a president educated in a public high school in the 21st century.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:The fact that these kids get into Yale from their so-called "inadequate" public schools is a testament to the fact that our fears of public schools are irrational.

If public school was so great for those kids, why not attend a public university too?

Many public university graduates are very successful and make a lot of money. I have a classmate that went to Frostburg State, where she met her husband. They are doing very well and have an enormous house. I'm not sure what your point is.

Exactly, so why bash private schools k-12 and then turn around and send your kid to private U?

Your college ends up on your resume for life and, even decades after graduation, it can play a role in whether you get a job or not. Not so with elementary, middle, and high schools.

The

Nope. Private k-12 matters far more in terms of college preparation, future dating & friendships, becoming acculturated, socialization and poise. Your kid who went to a LMC public school will forever be an interloper an Ivy. Hopefully they are prepared enough to finish a useful major, but that’s unlikely. Kids who went to independent schools dominate the Greek life, secret society & eating club scenes no matter where they go to college.

Ew, this is precisely why I didn't send my kids to private. PP, we do not share the same values.

HHI of 7 figures, BTW.

Also gross to tell us your HHI.

Well it's not like I announce it at parties. This is anonymous discussion about our choices, and by indicating that I avoid snobby wealthy people, I will inevitably get the response, "Oh, you're just jealous that you can't afford to send your kid to my swanky private school." I was just heading that one off at the pass.

Right, you send your kids to surgically segregated publics instead. So much more noble to do that!

What does surgically segregated mean?

Very carefully drawn boundaries to keep out poor people/subsidized housing/rentals.

Well that quite the assumption.

Our elementary school is 60% economically disadvantaged and 70% Black and brown. Our (unaccredited) middle school has similar stats, and one of the three feeder schools (40% of the school) is horribly hyper-segregated and draws almost entirely from a public housing court. I have kids in both schools.

I'm (secretly) paying for the bus for the school field trip to Luray Caverns. Much better use of my money than the private schools that try to visit our school on their "empathy tour." Our students are not a zoo exhibit to teach you to count your blessings. Sorry that your bubble creates a deficit in this area.

It is child abuse to send your children to horribly failing schools when you have a 7-figure HHI. Enjoy your social experiment while your kids still speak to you.

Yes, living your espoused values of equality, charity, and civic duty is one of the worst things for children. Much better to worship status and materialism.

Your kids are going to resent you.

It’s a huge benefit later in life to be able to say that you are the product of public schools, especially if you get involved in politics.

We haven’t had a president educated in a public high school in the 21st century.

Correct. BTW Biden attended private school from K-12, including when he was “poor” in early childhood (he grew up in the richest neighborhood of his hometown, it is filled with houses that are insanely nice & look like castles). He proceeded to send his sons & daughter to private school from k through college despite when was underwater on his houses & barely LMC in terms of incomes & assets. He hates public schools and has never set foot in one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The fact that these kids get into Yale from their so-called "inadequate" public schools is a testament to the fact that our fears of public schools are irrational.

If public school was so great for those kids, why not attend a public university too?

Many public university graduates are very successful and make a lot of money. I have a classmate that went to Frostburg State, where she met her husband. They are doing very well and have an enormous house. I'm not sure what your point is.

Exactly, so why bash private schools k-12 and then turn around and send your kid to private U?

Your college ends up on your resume for life and, even decades after graduation, it can play a role in whether you get a job or not. Not so with elementary, middle, and high schools.

The

Nope. Private k-12 matters far more in terms of college preparation, future dating & friendships, becoming acculturated, socialization and poise. Your kid who went to a LMC public school will forever be an interloper an Ivy. Hopefully they are prepared enough to finish a useful major, but that’s unlikely. Kids who went to independent schools dominate the Greek life, secret society & eating club scenes no matter where they go to college.

Ew, this is precisely why I didn't send my kids to private. PP, we do not share the same values.

HHI of 7 figures, BTW.

Also gross to tell us your HHI.

Well it's not like I announce it at parties. This is anonymous discussion about our choices, and by indicating that I avoid snobby wealthy people, I will inevitably get the response, "Oh, you're just jealous that you can't afford to send your kid to my swanky private school." I was just heading that one off at the pass.

Right, you send your kids to surgically segregated publics instead. So much more noble to do that!

What does surgically segregated mean?

Very carefully drawn boundaries to keep out poor people/subsidized housing/rentals.

Well that quite the assumption.

Our elementary school is 60% economically disadvantaged and 70% Black and brown. Our (unaccredited) middle school has similar stats, and one of the three feeder schools (40% of the school) is horribly hyper-segregated and draws almost entirely from a public housing court. I have kids in both schools.

I'm (secretly) paying for the bus for the school field trip to Luray Caverns. Much better use of my money than the private schools that try to visit our school on their "empathy tour." Our students are not a zoo exhibit to teach you to count your blessings. Sorry that your bubble creates a deficit in this area.

It is child abuse to send your children to horribly failing schools when you have a 7-figure HHI. Enjoy your social experiment while your kids still speak to you.

Yes, living your espoused values of equality, charity, and civic duty is one of the worst things for children. Much better to worship status and materialism.

Your kids are going to resent you.

It’s a huge benefit later in life to be able to say that you are the product of public schools, especially if you get involved in politics.

We haven’t had a president educated in a public high school in the 21st century.

Correct. BTW Biden attended private school from K-12, including when he was “poor” in early childhood (he grew up in the richest neighborhood of his hometown, it is filled with houses that are insanely nice & look like castles). He proceeded to send his sons & daughter to private school from k through college despite when was underwater on his houses & barely LMC in terms of incomes & assets. He hates public schools and has never set foot in one.

So you agree that being a product of the public school system is a huge asset, politically-speaking? J.D. Vance went from no political career whatsoever to the U.S. Senate largely based on his public school upbringing and hardscrabble mythos. I’ll bet he never once mentioned Yale during the campaign.