How long would you wait for a proposal?

[Anonymous]

How long would you wait for a proposal before dumping the guy?

[Anonymous]

Depends on how old I am. After 30, no more than two years. Under 30, I'd go a bit longer.

[Anonymous]

I told DH when we were dating that I wanted to have a kid before I turned 30. I basically said, let me know now if that presents a problem because I'll have to make alternate arrangements. I had DD 3 weeks before my 30th birthday

I think it just depends on, as a PP has said, how old you are and if you have a sense of being ready to be married (be it to the current guy or whoever is the "right" one).

[Anonymous]

If I felt ready to get married, I'd ask him if he wants to get married. If he didn't, or if his timeline was too vague, and I really was ready, I'd leave him. I got married at 27, though, so I realize I don't totally understand how this works.

[Anonymous]

I was not willing to wait longer than 26 months with my husband. We were 27/28. We had very specific and clear conversations leading up to it.

I would not be comfortable waiting more than 2-2.5 years unless we were under 25, and if having kids is important. If I didn't want kids, I would still probably draw the line at 3 years if marriage was important to me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How long would you wait for a proposal before dumping the guy?

Why are you waiting for a proposal? Talk to him and let him know that marriage is what you want and you want it with him and find out if that's what he wants with you. Don't wait and hope, damn that.

[Anonymous]

Older than 27 = 1 year and not a minute more.

[Anonymous]

We met at work. Started dating 2 years later. Married 6 years after that. I don't recall it being an issue.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Older than 27 = 1 year and not a minute more.

Are you serious? That isn't enough time to really know someone.

[Anonymous]

Non-married 26 year old here. I am currently in a relationship with a new guy. I personally don't want to get married before I'm 30. Ideally anywhere between 30 and 35. I see myself being married by 30 with my first at 32/33. It all depends on my life but I definitely do not want marriage or a child before 30.

[Anonymous]

2.5 years. Know what you want and be willing to walk.

[Anonymous]

Heh. I waited four years for One boyfriend. We'd had multiple conversations about it. But he wasn't moving forward at all. So I broke up with him. "Then" he asked me to marry him. But it was too late.

It's 13 years later now. He's headed toward 50 really soon and still not married.

Contrast that to my now-husband. He was talking marriage within 6 months. We married after 14 months.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

It's 13 years later now. He's headed toward 50 really soon and still not married.

You say as that's a bad thing.


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[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Non-married 26 year old here. I am currently in a relationship with a new guy. I personally don't want to get married before I'm 30. Ideally anywhere between 30 and 35. I see myself being married by 30 with my first at 32/33. It all depends on my life but I definitely do not want marriage or a child before 30.

Great. Then this sounds perfect. Just be aware that just like relationships can go on for too long, they can also peak too soon. If you're adamant that you don't want to be married for at least four years, this guy may not be willing to hang around for that long in limbo status.

[Anonymous]

Communication is key in any relationship, OP. Why don't you start now and talk to him about it?

DH proposed on the second date, with a deliciously-scented rosebud from his own garden. I refused.
We continued dating and after 2 years I started bringing home wedding magazines. He got the hint. I designed the ring, just because I'm so picky and perfectionist. He went and had it made, and proposed.

I preferred the first, spontaneous proposal to be honest.