My cousin is into the paranormal and its making me crazy. Need some advice please?

[Anonymous]

So this is my cousin and her wife. My cousin and I are close, same age went through school together, and she has always been into horoscopes and psychics, but not over the top. Four years ago her wife came into our lives and since then its become ghosts and spirits and all sort of paranormal. They read tarot and seek out spirits and its really all they talk about anymore. I don't believe in any of it, but I would tolerate it before, now it is embarrassing.

Like before she'd say things like my husband and I adore each other because we are Pisces and Scorpio we do adore each other but its not because of zodiac signs. Or that her psychic told her my last baby would be a girl. She was right but it was a 50/50 chance it would be. Whenever I kinda roll my eyes at some paranormal stuff she always points these things out as proof. When I point out what her psychic or their tarot has gotten wrong, she makes an excuse or says some nonsense like "well we don't always see the truth with our human eyes". Ugh.

She nuts, okay? I get it but it used to just be kooky. Now its past lives of my children and the aura of my cat. (I shit you not)

My cousin was upset I didn't invite them to a party recently, but this was a mixed party and I just didn't want them whipping out crystals and cards and talking about the fucking ghost that lives in their house. My husbands colleagues were there! Church friends, club friends, etc.

I felt bad that she felt so bad. She was really hurt and I agree, I should have just asked her not to do that. In my defense others in my family have asked them to stop at gatherings and they really don't make much of an effort.

Well now guess what, her wife insists we have a ghost in our house, she says she didn't want to mention it because she thought it was peaceful, but now she believes it to be angry or some whacko thing. She even told my 7 year old all about it and she freaked and we had to go through the whole "Monsters arent real" thing with her.

Really I know this is ridiculous, but stay with me please, I need advice. They want to cleanse my house of the spirit. Heres the thing, should I let them? It might make my cousin feel better, but I don't believe any of this hokum and I don't want to encourage it. I don't want her wife to let slip to my four young children that there is a ghost in their home. I also don't want my nice upholstery to smell like sage smoke. My cousin keeps sending me messages about how healing this would be. Shes all excited. She bought a crystal she says to keep in my home for protection and I'm just afraid if I give an inch here they'll take a mile.

What should I do? I want to roll my eyes and laugh, but honestly what harm would it do? Then again I wouldn't want this to be seen as an invitation to more.

I just reread this and it sounds trollish, I swear its not. Help?

[Anonymous]

Just say, "No thanks. My house doesn't need cleansing and I'd really rather you didn't."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just say, "No thanks. My house doesn't need cleansing and I'd really rather you didn't."

+1


You're probably going to have to distance yourself a little.

[Anonymous]

Tell her you respect her beliefs (even though you don't) but that you don't believe them yourself and it makes you uncomfortable. Just as it would if she were aggressively trying to convert you to another religion. Say you are sorry to hurt her feelings but because you don't share the same belief system, you don't want to talk about this stuff and you definitely don't want it in your house.

[Anonymous]

If taking the crystal would hush her up then I'd just take it. But I'd stop it there and not do the cleansing of it makes you uncomfortable. Really your cousin is being really pushy and inappropriate here, even if this was about something more mainstream she still needs to get ahold of herself.

[Anonymous]

Did your cousin get a phone call about a storage pod that was paid for by a dead relative?

[Anonymous]

Tell her that the ghost spoke to you and said that your cousin and wife should keep their traps shut about ghosts when around young children.

I would love to hear about your cat's aura, but I'd like to smack someone who told my kids that they had past lives.

[Anonymous]

The PPs here are pretty damn disrespectful, but I'm not surprised that you people aren't able to be open-minded. Good for you!

Having said that, OP your cousin is out of bounds. Frankly she's stupid if she thought she wasn't going to get laughed at by sharing her beliefs with you so maybe this will be a lesson for her. I actually share the same beliefs as your cousin, but I do NOT ever share them and nobody in RL knows I have them - for precisely the reason demonstrated in this thread. People are intolerant, narrow-minded, and disrespectful about our beliefs. That's just how it is.

I still agree that it's not right of her to force her ideas on you. Belief is deeply personal. Nobody has the right to tell you how to live (just like you actually don't have the right to make fun of her beliefs, but you go ahead and be whatever kind of person you are).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The PPs here are pretty damn disrespectful, but I'm not surprised that you people aren't able to be open-minded. Good for you!

Having said that, OP your cousin is out of bounds. Frankly she's stupid if she thought she wasn't going to get laughed at by sharing her beliefs with you so maybe this will be a lesson for her. I actually share the same beliefs as your cousin, but I do NOT ever share them and nobody in RL knows I have them - for precisely the reason demonstrated in this thread. People are intolerant, narrow-minded, and disrespectful about our beliefs. That's just how it is.

I still agree that it's not right of her to force her ideas on you. Belief is deeply personal. Nobody has the right to tell you how to live (just like you actually don't have the right to make fun of her beliefs, but you go ahead and be whatever kind of person you are).

Oh come on its pretty ridiculous to believe your birthday forms your personality or a tarot card tells you what to eat for lunch.

If you believe whackadoo things expect people to think you are a whackadoo.

Whackadoo.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The PPs here are pretty damn disrespectful, but I'm not surprised that you people aren't able to be open-minded. Good for you!

Having said that, OP your cousin is out of bounds. Frankly she's stupid if she thought she wasn't going to get laughed at by sharing her beliefs with you so maybe this will be a lesson for her. I actually share the same beliefs as your cousin, but I do NOT ever share them and nobody in RL knows I have them - for precisely the reason demonstrated in this thread. People are intolerant, narrow-minded, and disrespectful about our beliefs. That's just how it is.

I still agree that it's not right of her to force her ideas on you. Belief is deeply personal. Nobody has the right to tell you how to live (just like you actually don't have the right to make fun of her beliefs, but you go ahead and be whatever kind of person you are).

Your beliefs aren't more or less stupid than any other religion. I'll give you that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The PPs here are pretty damn disrespectful, but I'm not surprised that you people aren't able to be open-minded. Good for you!

I still agree that it's not right of her to force her ideas on you. Belief is deeply personal. Nobody has the right to tell you how to live (just like you actually don't have the right to make fun of her beliefs, but you go ahead and be whatever kind of person you are).

So its totally cool to believe you can scare a 7 year old and no one should be pissed of at you for it, because it is your deeply personal belief? Come on.

[Anonymous]

At first I was going to write a very strongly worded post in support of the OP and then I read all the replies. As a Christian, I find this thread almost as appalling as OP's cousin's behavior. I like how atheists are the ones who scream about intolerance when I remember myself being called "crazy" in high school because I believed in the miracles of Christ's birth.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:At first I was going to write a very strongly worded post in support of the OP and then I read all the replies. As a Christian, I find this thread almost as appalling as OP's cousin's behavior. I like how atheists are the ones who scream about intolerance when I remember myself being called "crazy" in high school because I believed in the miracles of Christ's birth.

I'm the OP and I'm catholic. My cousin was raised catholic too. Now shes wiccan.

I'd love to know your opinion.

I'm grateful for the advice I've gotten so far and don't think anyone was particularly mean.

[Anonymous]

In her defense, your cousin has perhaps gone this far because you were tolerant of her beliefs.
But she has crossed a line here, and you have the painful duty to say:

"Dear Martha, I'm sorry if this is upsetting to hear, but I really cannot have anyone telling my children about ghosts in their house, or accounts of their past lives. I draw the line at having my kids traumatized. I love you, but I don't want any more paranormal talk in my house from now on."

And be prepared for fall-out.

[Anonymous]

... and , if I understand you right, this talk of ghost was just invented to get revenge for the recent non-invite, correct? If that's the case, they are really childish.