I need constant validation from my boyfriend. Help!

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[Post New]04/27/2015 13:37
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Anonymous
I've realized that I constantly need validation that he loves me and that he finds me attractive. It's exhausting and is driving me crazy. How can I help myself? Is he doing something wrong where I constantly feel insecure about us or is it in my head?
[Post New]04/27/2015 13:40
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Anonymous
so do I. Let me know how you fix it.
[Post New]04/27/2015 13:40
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Anonymous
Have your past relationships had the same track pattern?
[Post New]04/27/2015 13:42
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Have your past relationships had the same track pattern?

I've only had one other bf and with him I never felt insecure. About his feelings or my attractiveness.
[Post New]04/27/2015 13:52
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I've realized that I constantly need validation that he loves me and that he finds me attractive. It's exhausting and is driving me crazy. How can I help myself? Is he doing something wrong where I constantly feel insecure about us or is it in my head?


Have you been like this in prior relationships or just this one? That's the place to start.
[Post New]04/27/2015 13:53
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I've realized that I constantly need validation that he loves me and that he finds me attractive. It's exhausting and is driving me crazy. How can I help myself? Is he doing something wrong where I constantly feel insecure about us or is it in my head?


Have you been like this in prior relationships or just this one? That's the place to start.


Oops, just saw PP beat me to it!
[Post New]04/27/2015 13:53
quote
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Have your past relationships had the same track pattern?

I've only had one other bf and with him I never felt insecure. About his feelings or my attractiveness.


And that relationship fell apart because?
[Post New]04/27/2015 14:20
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Anonymous
give me his number so I can tell him to run far far away
[Post New]04/27/2015 14:46
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:give me his number so I can tell him to run far far away


+100
[Post New]04/27/2015 14:52
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:so do I. Let me know how you fix it.


How about growing up?
[Post New]04/27/2015 14:52
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I've realized that I constantly need validation that he loves me and that he finds me attractive. It's exhausting and is driving me crazy. How can I help myself? Is he doing something wrong where I constantly feel insecure about us or is it in my head?


How old are you?
[Post New]04/27/2015 14:55
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I've realized that I constantly need validation that he loves me and that he finds me attractive. It's exhausting and is driving me crazy. How can I help myself? Is he doing something wrong where I constantly feel insecure about us or is it in my head?


You need to do two things.

First, find a good professional counselor.

And last, take no further advice on this or any other forum aside from the one I just gave.
[Post New]04/27/2015 14:57
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Anonymous
Have you looked into codependency? This is a hallmark characteristic of a person who's codependent.
[Post New]04/27/2015 15:02
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Anonymous
NEEDY

I feel sorry for him because if you don't get a grip he will take that walk.
[Post New]04/27/2015 15:06
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Anonymous

Find a new boyfriend. Gaslighting isn't fun. If you feel somewhat strung along, it may not be that you need constant affirmation. He may like keeping you on edge. Not cute.

Consider that your need may not be the problem, especially since you haven't experienced this in other relationships.



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