MIL photographs our belongings (not people)

[Anonymous]

...as weird as the title reads...this is what MIL does. She takes pics of "things" - and she only seems to do this to us (not SILs). Given the odd circumstances, and odd MIL, what would you say to her? I don't know WHY (WHY???) she does it, and I really don't care to know, I just want her to stop. Rooms in our house, as just an example. If I had to guess, I would say she likes topics of conversation for her bridge club. But frankly, this is why she was not invited to the births of our DC (who knows where the camera would have been pointed then!). Before anyone goes off the rails, only DH was at the births of our DC, per our wishes. but I digress.

What on earth do you say to someone who does this? Am I the only one who finds this completely rude?

Also, when it is time to take a group photo with DC in it, she is suddenly "out of battery", or some other lame excuse. It is clear she does not want to acknowledge the presence of DC, but wants to show our stuff to other people, whom we don't even know. I know this sounds ridiculous, because it is. If you were put in this very awkward situation, what would you say? No one else I know seems to have this issue with their MIL, understandably.

Should I say: "stop, just stop" and leave it at that? So bizarre.

[Anonymous]

I would just ask, politely but with a quizzical expression, "Why are you taking pictures of our things?"

[Anonymous]

My MIL takes pics of us eating or otherwise caught unaware. She's the fool with her cell phone just snapping away at family dinners.

[Anonymous]

I have to say, I am obsessive about my privacy so it would make me CRAZY if my MIL was taking pictures of my home to show to her bridge buddies. I'd ask my husband to say something to her about this odd habit for sure.

[Anonymous]

what does she do with the pictures ?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:what does she do with the pictures ?

OP here. I gave you my best guess in the original post. It would never occur to me to take pictures of other people's stuff, while refusing to take pictures of my young grandchildren (son and DIL, too) - all in the same house. That's just insane behavior. I am also a private person, PP, so it does get on my nerves; but Mil is the type of person that, if I were to voice how I feel, she may just keep doing it. Perhaps moreso. She is rather dark and depressed - warm and sunny is not what comes to mind when describing her.

Who does this??? Am I the only one who thinks this is ballsy and rude - not in a good way???

It would be up to me to say anything. It is not a communicative family, with the exception of me What I want to say is "WTF??" Other ideas?

[Anonymous]

Unless she is planning to buy you something decorative for your house I can think of no reason for this. Maybe she admires how you decorate and wants to use the pictures for inspiration or she knows someone who would?

I'm trying to think of a nice reason for this and that's about as good as I can do. Sorry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would just ask, politely but with a quizzical expression, "Why are you taking pictures of our things?"

This.

Then wait for an answer and address whatever she says directly.

[Anonymous]

I really wouldn't kick up a fuss about this. Who cares if someone sees a photo of the secretaire from Great Aunt Lavinia or my rickety old tallboy left to me by my dear departed granny. I really couldn't care less.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:...as weird as the title reads...this is what MIL does. She takes pics of "things" - and she only seems to do this to us (not SILs). Given the odd circumstances, and odd MIL, what would you say to her? I don't know WHY (WHY???) she does it, and I really don't care to know, I just want her to stop. Rooms in our house, as just an example. If I had to guess, I would say she likes topics of conversation for her bridge club. But frankly, this is why she was not invited to the births of our DC (who knows where the camera would have been pointed then!). Before anyone goes off the rails, only DH was at the births of our DC, per our wishes. but I digress.

What on earth do you say to someone who does this? Am I the only one who finds this completely rude?

Also, when it is time to take a group photo with DC in it, she is suddenly "out of battery", or some other lame excuse. It is clear she does not want to acknowledge the presence of DC, but wants to show our stuff to other people, whom we don't even know. I know this sounds ridiculous, because it is. If you were put in this very awkward situation, what would you say? No one else I know seems to have this issue with their MIL, understandably.

Should I say: "stop, just stop" and leave it at that? So bizarre.

Wow, you are extremely petty and very high maintenance. Maybe your MIL is on the spectrum, has anxiety or OCD. This is such a minor quirk. You, however, sound like a major piece of work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:...as weird as the title reads...this is what MIL does. She takes pics of "things" - and she only seems to do this to us (not SILs). Given the odd circumstances, and odd MIL, what would you say to her? I don't know WHY (WHY???) she does it, and I really don't care to know, I just want her to stop. Rooms in our house, as just an example. If I had to guess, I would say she likes topics of conversation for her bridge club. But frankly, this is why she was not invited to the births of our DC (who knows where the camera would have been pointed then!). Before anyone goes off the rails, only DH was at the births of our DC, per our wishes. but I digress.

What on earth do you say to someone who does this? Am I the only one who finds this completely rude?

Also, when it is time to take a group photo with DC in it, she is suddenly "out of battery", or some other lame excuse. It is clear she does not want to acknowledge the presence of DC, but wants to show our stuff to other people, whom we don't even know. I know this sounds ridiculous, because it is. If you were put in this very awkward situation, what would you say? No one else I know seems to have this issue with their MIL, understandably.

Should I say: "stop, just stop" and leave it at that? So bizarre.

Wow, you are extremely petty and very high maintenance. Maybe your MIL is on the spectrum, has anxiety or OCD. This is such a minor quirk. You, however, sound like a major piece of work.

Maybe all of the above. Does that excuse anyone from going into your house and being completely rude?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have to say, I am obsessive about my privacy so it would make me CRAZY if my MIL was taking pictures of my home to show to her bridge buddies. I'd ask my husband to say something to her about this odd habit for sure.

+1 I like my privacy and I wish I could just let things like this go but it would drive me nuts. I could see my ILs doing this so they could show family back home but they never have and if they asked I would likely say no. It just makes me uncomfortable.

[Anonymous]

Ask her to come to my house-- I keep meaning to take some pics for insurance purposes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:...as weird as the title reads...this is what MIL does. She takes pics of "things" - and she only seems to do this to us (not SILs). Given the odd circumstances, and odd MIL, what would you say to her? I don't know WHY (WHY???) she does it, and I really don't care to know, I just want her to stop. Rooms in our house, as just an example. If I had to guess, I would say she likes topics of conversation for her bridge club. But frankly, this is why she was not invited to the births of our DC (who knows where the camera would have been pointed then!). Before anyone goes off the rails, only DH was at the births of our DC, per our wishes. but I digress.

What on earth do you say to someone who does this? Am I the only one who finds this completely rude?

Also, when it is time to take a group photo with DC in it, she is suddenly "out of battery", or some other lame excuse. It is clear she does not want to acknowledge the presence of DC, but wants to show our stuff to other people, whom we don't even know. I know this sounds ridiculous, because it is. If you were put in this very awkward situation, what would you say? No one else I know seems to have this issue with their MIL, understandably.

Should I say: "stop, just stop" and leave it at that? So bizarre.

Wow, you are extremely petty and very high maintenance. Maybe your MIL is on the spectrum, has anxiety or OCD. This is such a minor quirk. You, however, sound like a major piece of work.

eh, I think that's a bit harsh. It's an invasion of privacy to take pictures of someone else's private belongings like that and not even allowing them the courtesy of knowing WHY you are taking these random pictures of their stuff.

I would point blank ask out of confusion - "Why did you just take a picture of our couch?" and see what she says.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I really wouldn't kick up a fuss about this. Who cares if someone sees a photo of the secretaire from Great Aunt Lavinia or my rickety old tallboy left to me by my dear departed granny. I really couldn't care less.

This