Ok Cupid and match
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Anonymous
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So, my divorce is final and my heart is finally in a place were I can comfortably date again. I have a accounts on both sites. A few observervations.
The men on ok Cupid in general are better looking than match for the same search terms. I found many guys on ok Cupid to have better profiles Lot more 40ish divorced women with full time kids then there are men on March. Didn't look at women on ok Cupid. And they are all so pretty! I am good looking, but omg it must be a smorgasbord for men! A bit depressing. |
Anonymous
When I was a single guy there were always more men than women yet I went on a good number of dates. Doesn't matter what anyone else looks like. All it takes is one. Even models get rejected. |
Anonymous
| There are more people in general on OKC. |
Anonymous
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I felt like the guys on OkCupid put more into their profiles than the ones on Match, because you kind of have to put some time into your OKC profile.
I haven't done Match for years, but when I was on OKC a couple years ago, I thought the algorithm did a really good job of finding guys whose personalities interested me. A lot of them weren't attractive and many lived far away, but I thought the odds of finding someone on there were probably decent. (I don't really have time to date, but if I did, I'd go back on OKC.) If you're comfortable with it, you might want to consider Tinder. A lot of my friends are on it. (I'm 42.) |
Anonymous
| I am a 42 year old divorced male. I like OKC better than Match, and Tinder better than OKC. Tinder has a hook up reputation, but my experience has been dating and relationships from it. The whole profile thing (mostly Match) is overwrought. I like the connection on Tinder, and then the ability to text a bit, and set up a coffee or drink. Just my 0.02. |
Anonymous
| Personally, as a divorced male, I always thought DCUM should have a dating forum for the divorced. So many of us are in the same boat. DCUM posters (other than the trolls) are great. |
Anonymous
I agree |
Anonymous
The ones who had Classic DCUM Sexless Marriages would have a bonanza! 
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Anonymous
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35, female.
I like OKCupid MUCH better than Match. Granted, I tried Match first and probably hadn't gotten into the 'swing' of online dating yet, so take that into account. Match was depressing. It's a much smaller pool, and so you keep seeing the same profiles over and over again. After 4 or so months on OKCupid, I've been out with 6 different guys (some a few times). After the same amount of time on Match, I'd been out with 1. I will say that the one guy from Match and I made it last longer than anyone has on on OKCupid, but that was due to mutual compatibility, not the site. The volume on OKCupid just makes a difference. I message men more rarely than I did on Match, I'm still replying to ~10% of the messages I receive, and there are probably still at least 20 guys on there that I have bookmarked or liked or somehow flagged that I would be interested to go back and message in the future. It's good that you are trying both at once, OP. Just remember to keep a really, really open mind. Reply to messages from anyone who you find somewhat attractive who is absent major deal-breakers and actually sends decent messages. Date the people you can see spending a few interesting hours with after the messaging process. Profiles can be misleading, and often, a great profile is the sign of someone who is great at presenting themselves, not someone who is actually great themselves. Messaging is a much better gauge because there's 2-way back and forth, and they are actually responding to you, not just saying what they think women will find appealing. There's no substitute for in-person chemistry though, and it does not always translate from digital chemistry. Meet people after like a week-10 days of daily messaging. Also, this helps you weed out the flakes. I have had no less than 4 different men flake on dates that they themselves initiated. Married/attached and testing the waters? Not who they said they were? Who knows, but the sooner you find out, and stop wasting time messaging with them, the better. Luck! |
Anonymous
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Why is online dating the automatic default when someone wants to date? Do you people live in caves where nobody has friends, relatives, coworkers who can introduce them to people? Meet-up doesn't work either, even when a single-oriented group?
Online subjects someone to every dating game known to humanity. Plus, everybody is so witty and charming over a message, but in person, vastly different. Some better in person, others not. |
Anonymous
Because its the 21st century. You act like there are bars that attract only 40 something singles. Even in my 20s, I dated online in addition to meeting guys out and about. It's another avenue. |
Anonymous
Nobody is saying anything about bars and statistically they are the worst place to meet someone although everyone can point to an exception. OK, online is one more avenue, granted, but over and over it has been proven that you are most likely to meet a mate through friends, work, interests. It's because they know or see you in real life and can be vetted more carefully. Your friends are not likely to set you up with a loser. |
Anonymous
I'm a single mom who works in education. I am either at school or with my child. There are 5 men who work at my school and 4 of them are married. The 5th one is much too old for me. The only way I will definitely meet men is through online dating. |
Anonymous
To the PP who is down on online dating, why would you say that? Do you have a problem with online dating? I resisted online dating for years, but eventually I realized that I was being stupid and only hurting myself by denying myself a perfectly good way to meet men. I've been married to DH, who I met on Match, for seven years now and we have a beautiful DD. Online dating does work for some people so why be so negative about it? |
Anonymous
Sorry, wasn't trying to be negative but making the point that it is an automatic instead of looking at tried and true ways that have always worked. |