Half of British women reach age 30 without having a child

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:LOL. You think people made lifestyle choices based on SATC and Chelsea Handler?

Lolololol.

Yes, pop culture influences people. Chelsea Handler is a washed up old bag now but she was wildly popular and influential for about a 10 year run.

Do you know what else were pop culturephenomena?

Jon and Kate Plus Eight
18 Kids and Counting
Sister Wives

Do you think people were making life decisions based on these shows, too?

[Anonymous]

I am British and 53. I had my first kid at age 37. At the time, the national first time average for women in the UK across the board was 29 but for women in the wealthiest areas of the UK, it was actually 37.

[Anonymous]

Stop letting the global elite hoard all the money and more young people will have babies.

The average downpayment for a flat in London is now 150,000 GBP. This is why young people are not having kids before their 30s.

Fix the economics and you'll fix the baby problem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sex and the City gets a lot of the credit for glamorizing an actually terribly depressing way to squander your 20s and 30s but Chelsea Handler was also a big influencer in this regard. Her books, boasting about drinking, drugs, one-night stands and abortions were best sellers and her E! show, from '07 to '14, was wildly popular. Chelsea is now a rich and lonely 47 year old; unmarried and childless. This weekend she was in the hospital, all alone. She had to postpone her "Horny tour." Living the dream, amirite.

+infinity

Chelsea is a truly disgusting human being in many ways.

[Anonymous]

I don't like her very much, but Chelsea Handler is happily involved with someone, and isn't at the hospital alone. She also looks remarkably good for a hospitalized 47 year old.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am glad I didn't marry anybody I was dating in my early 20s. I was so immature and irresponsible, imagine adding a husband and babies on top of me not even understanding how credit cards worked or how to pay utilities?

Marriage and kid(s) force you to grow up faster. My dad 50 years ago was sort of a slacker, he immediately quit chain smoking cigarettes and drinking, and started his own company when I was born.

For every unemployed drunk who does get it together, there’s a dozen who continue drinking and slacking off after the kid arrives, and mom is trying to keep everything together. Just read the threads here - how many are about incompetent men who can’t even handle picking up a child from school?

We are specifically talking about modern men on a web forum based in the most educated region in the United States (DMV). Nobody here is talking about "unemployed drunks," we're talking about credentialed yuppies in their 20s, who might not be "rich, rich" but are rich relative to the average 20-something, plus have at least one degree, boundless resources, and health insurance. And yes, literally everyone I know in fitting that demo who had a surprise pregnancy immediately grew up and started acting exponentially more responsible.

The PP literally said her father was a smoker, drinker, and slacker.

We are also talking about early 20s people, which is very different than yuppies in their late 20s. People in DC generally don’t reproduce in their early 20s, which is perhaps why more men are able to step it up. An early 20s man who just graduated, is doing an internship, and living with 3 other dudes isn’t going to be able to handle marriage and kids.

Either way, this forum in the most educated region of the US is full of threads about dads who did not step it up and still can’t handle basic household and childcare tasks. So if DMV men can’t get it together with everything they have, probably not a good idea to continue encouraging people to get married and have kids by 23.

What is with this obsession with infantilizing grown ass men (and women) and seizing on 22 year olds? For one, there are quite a few years between "intern" and 35 (we know your motives for seizing on 22 year olds ). Two, even at 22 or 23, with a college degree and making $50k-plus in a big city career with good health care, you're doing better than about 99.9% of your peers globally. I promise having that baby in your early or mid 20s is going to bring you exponentially more joy and maturity to your life than another 5 to 10 to 15 years of aimless drifting in the big city.

Your “promise” is wrong.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Also she brags about her 21 year old daughter who married a med student. So old school. I would rather that my daughter was the doctor, not the doctors wife.

+100

Didn't gen X nana say her oldest daughter was an RN or a teacher? Hardly an insignificant career, with both requiring a master's degree and offering great pay vis a vis work-life balance, plus great health care and fringe benefits. You jaded spinsters – and don't deny that you're not, you're fooling no one – are twisting everything to paint her as low class white trash, with a barefoot and pregnant SAHM 20-something daughter and some budding MD son in law who of course cheats on her with classmates and will divorce her to marry some surgeon or lawyer. Your cynicism suggests you're deeply unhappy.

You don’t even know that RNs don’t have Master’s degrees. Stick your pathetic “spinster” lies in your ear.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know people are just responding to brunch granny, buy beyond the inflammatory trolling, there is a grain of truth there. The 21st century economy is incompatible with raising kids with two parents in the workforce. As a result, the birth rate will continue to decline. I would love it if our society didn’t view anyone over 40 as “past it,” allowing women to have children young *if they want* and then having a career later.

I have three and needed IVF for 2. I would have loved to have 4, but it was impossible. In our 20s, my husband and I were struggling with student loans and trying to get jobs. It’s only gotten worse.

I feel very lucky then because my husband and I both managed to work full time the entire time we were raising our kids, thanks to home daycare and an awesome nanny when the kids got older.

I do think the trend is going to be for having kids earlier and then doing career. That's where I think youth are headed --- lower income always have kids earlier. Upper income have moved earlier also. UMC/professional class next. There will always be women having kids when older but I think you will see a trend younger soon.

Based on what exactly? I see the complete opposite.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am British and 53. I had my first kid at age 37. At the time, the national first time average for women in the UK across the board was 29 but for women in the wealthiest areas of the UK, it was actually 37.

The reverse is happening in US. Lower income births start young but by 20s. Middle to professional class are much much later. UC is trending back down to 20s again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Life is expensive. Men suck. The end.

BAM! Well said.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Stop letting the global elite hoard all the money and more young people will have babies.

The average downpayment for a flat in London is now 150,000 GBP. This is why young people are not having kids before their 30s.

Fix the economics and you'll fix the baby problem.

Nobody rich or with power cares to fix the "problem," as it was literally orchestrated by them for consumerism profit and to slam middle class wages under the guise of new wave feminism.

[Anonymous]

Careerism is a fake excuse for delaying kids. Two young women in our office are 26 and 28, make a little over $100,000 a year, and just took 6 months paid maternity leave. Their career isn't going to be hurt what so ever.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Also she brags about her 21 year old daughter who married a med student. So old school. I would rather that my daughter was the doctor, not the doctors wife.

+100

Didn't gen X nana say her oldest daughter was an RN or a teacher? Hardly an insignificant career, with both requiring a master's degree and offering great pay vis a vis work-life balance, plus great health care and fringe benefits. You jaded spinsters – and don't deny that you're not, you're fooling no one – are twisting everything to paint her as low class white trash, with a barefoot and pregnant SAHM 20-something daughter and some budding MD son in law who of course cheats on her with classmates and will divorce her to marry some surgeon or lawyer. Your cynicism suggests you're deeply unhappy.

You don’t even know that RNs don’t have Master’s degrees. Stick your pathetic “spinster” lies in your ear.

No fog in this fight but lots of rns have masters.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am British and 53. I had my first kid at age 37. At the time, the national first time average for women in the UK across the board was 29 but for women in the wealthiest areas of the UK, it was actually 37.

The reverse is happening in US. Lower income births start young but by 20s. Middle to professional class are much much later. UC is trending back down to 20s again.

The US has always had a much younger average for first time mothers because across the board it has a much, much, much younger marriage age.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A lot of expectations for young women make motherhood extremely impractical. You can't tell young women they need to be independent, well-educated, have a career, physcially fit, and highly social, and then expect them to have kids in their 20s. Just... how?

Also, you see such broad criticism of young mothers in the UK and the US, that they are irresponsible or insufficient. There's huge stigma, and not just for high SES women.

Yes, but what I’ve observed with single childless professional women in the dc metro area is simply that they aren’t in long term relationships.

I know a lot of great women (attractive, fit, educated, employed, fun, etc) who are chronically single. Ranging from early 20s to mid 50s.

Meanwhile, my closest friends and I met our future husbands in college or grad school in the 90s. Everyone was married by their mid-20s and had their first baby at 28-30. (This is a cohort of friends from a private school in MoCo.)

Not here. Met DH at 26 yrs old after grad school in dc during 1st profess job. (No we did not meet at work and are in different industries). Married at 28 yrs old. We are chosen childfree. Now in 50s and can retire anytime. Life is good.