How is your gifted kid doing at a lower-ranked college?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I may have missed it somewhere but have you had actual IQ testing done?

No. I don't believe in IQ tests. DD did take the SAT in 7th grade to get into CTY, and she did very well.

Then you really don't know if she's gifted, or how many standard deviations above normal she is. Without that info, no one here can really help you. That sort of testing usually starts fairly early when applying to privates at pre-K, K, etc. You need to have a professional neuropsych test done (expensive, at least $3,000, should be spread out over several days). That will help to tease out ADHD, Aspergers/ASD, anxiety disorder, depression and I.Q. For example, my Aspie kid came in at a MENSA level I.Q but very slow processing speed. He had a terrible time with homework (executive function) but is brilliant. Brilliance doesn't help unless you know how to use it and that's what the SN schools NOW can help you with. For example, if she has ADHD, you might like Commonwealth Academy which helps gifted ADHD kids. Or Nysmith (Gifted), etc. But that testing needs to be done now. In the SN world, every three years is considered normal because children change and diagnoses change. You could try calling around for a neuropsych tester who will do just I.Q. but it sounds like there's a lot of other things going on that you need to worry about before college. Best of luck!

I completely agree with this poster.

You've been a little coy, OP. Has there been a neuropsych done? What are her AP exam scores and SAT/ACT she's taken as a Junior?

Because as it stands, she could be:
1. Profoundly gifted, and struggle for a while (or lifelong, like my profoundly gifted relatives) because it's never going to be interesting enough or the right fit.
2. Twice exceptional with diagnosable disabilities that you'd need to address for her to reach her potential.
3. Above-average kid that just doesn't like school and must learn to see the glass half-full.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I may have missed it somewhere but have you had actual IQ testing done?

No. I don't believe in IQ tests. DD did take the SAT in 7th grade to get into CTY, and she did very well.

An IQ test is a necessary and clinically informative part of a neuropsychological evaluation, which I hope you've done. You cannot claim that your child is gifted and unhappy with school, and has no disorders, if you haven't done your due diligence. Ignorance and prejudice on your part will harm your child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She sounds really annoying TBH

She also sounds very entitled.

Maybe she should get a JOB.

Wtf is wrong with everyone? She sounds like a normal healthy teenager to me!! State school will be wonderful, OP. She will flourish and find her people!

Thank you. Even if untrue, this is what I need to hear! I'm sad that I can't offer DD the chance to go to a "better" school, but our finances won't allow it. I really admire her intellect (I wish I had her brains!). She's fun to talk with as she's so well read and has interesting opinions and ideas about all sorts of subjects. I don't want her to sink into a quagmire of mediocrity, which she seems to be engulfed by in high school. It's helpful to hear from parents whose gifted kids have thrived at lower-ranked schools.

[Anonymous]

Interesting that OP never answers the hard questions.
My take is that her DD isn't that gifted, and just has some growing up to do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I may have missed it somewhere but have you had actual IQ testing done?

No. I don't believe in IQ tests. DD did take the SAT in 7th grade to get into CTY, and she did very well.

An IQ test is a necessary and clinically informative part of a neuropsychological evaluation, which I hope you've done. You cannot claim that your child is gifted and unhappy with school, and has no disorders, if you haven't done your due diligence. Ignorance and prejudice on your part will harm your child.

Let's agree to disagree. I listened to a highly qualified and respected psychotherapist who says my child is "gifted." I don't care what that means technically if it even has a precise meaning. There is lots to read about how inaccurate IQ tests are.

In any case, it doesn't matter for this discussion. I posted to hear from parents whose gifted kids (whatever that means to them) have thrived at lesser ranked colleges and universities. Those posts are useful and helpful to me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Interesting that OP never answers the hard questions.
My take is that her DD isn't that gifted, and just has some growing up to do.

Bedtime. Now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I may have missed it somewhere but have you had actual IQ testing done?

No. I don't believe in IQ tests. DD did take the SAT in 7th grade to get into CTY, and she did very well.

An IQ test is a necessary and clinically informative part of a neuropsychological evaluation, which I hope you've done. You cannot claim that your child is gifted and unhappy with school, and has no disorders, if you haven't done your due diligence. Ignorance and prejudice on your part will harm your child.

Let's agree to disagree. I listened to a highly qualified and respected psychotherapist who says my child is "gifted." I don't care what that means technically if it even has a precise meaning. There is lots to read about how inaccurate IQ tests are.

In any case, it doesn't matter for this discussion. I posted to hear from parents whose gifted kids (whatever that means to them) have thrived at lesser ranked colleges and universities. Those posts are useful and helpful to me.

Sorry, but you've been leading us up the garden path. Some of us have expertise in this field and have tried to help you, but you don't want help.

It's sad that some people can be so anti-science.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Interesting that OP never answers the hard questions.
My take is that her DD isn't that gifted, and just has some growing up to do.

What kind of weirdo says this?? JFC

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I may have missed it somewhere but have you had actual IQ testing done?

No. I don't believe in IQ tests. DD did take the SAT in 7th grade to get into CTY, and she did very well.

An IQ test is a necessary and clinically informative part of a neuropsychological evaluation, which I hope you've done. You cannot claim that your child is gifted and unhappy with school, and has no disorders, if you haven't done your due diligence. Ignorance and prejudice on your part will harm your child.

Let's agree to disagree. I listened to a highly qualified and respected psychotherapist who says my child is "gifted." I don't care what that means technically if it even has a precise meaning. There is lots to read about how inaccurate IQ tests are.

In any case, it doesn't matter for this discussion. I posted to hear from parents whose gifted kids (whatever that means to them) have thrived at lesser ranked colleges and universities. Those posts are useful and helpful to me.

Most people can’t afford to their kids to their dream school. College will be an awakening for her. Freedom, independence, interesting people. She will thrive. What is the public school you were thinking of?

[Anonymous]

If you are in Virginia, William and Mary should be on your list.
Many of the Ohio Slacs give merit aid but I am not sure if would be enough or if she has the stats to qualify for merit aid

If in Maryland, definitely apply by November 1st to be considered for the honors programs. There are TONS of bright, intellectual students at UMD honors. Half the graduating class from the Montgomery county magnet programs end up at UMD. She will have plenty of peers

Try to encourage her to see the glass as half full. Don’t describe any college as a “lower ranked” college. She needs to be encouraged to make the most of the opportunities she is provided. Make no mistake, you are doing well in providing her and her siblings with a college education. No small feat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you are in Virginia, William and Mary should be on your list.
Many of the Ohio Slacs give merit aid but I am not sure if would be enough or if she has the stats to qualify for merit aid

If in Maryland, definitely apply by November 1st to be considered for the honors programs. There are TONS of bright, intellectual students at UMD honors. Half the graduating class from the Montgomery county magnet programs end up at UMD. She will have plenty of peers

Try to encourage her to see the glass as half full. Don’t describe any college as a “lower ranked” college. She needs to be encouraged to make the most of the opportunities she is provided. Make no mistake, you are doing well in providing her and her siblings with a college education. No small feat.

+100

[Anonymous]

OP, my high stats kid with great ECs and awards got enough aid at schools like Oberlin ($75,000 plus) and Kenyon to bring the cost down to about $45,000 (not including personal expenses). I haven’t heard of a higher merit award this year there. Now, I have a friend whose kid got merit awards at much lower tier SLACs (like the Wesleyan in Louisiana) that brought cost down to $30,000. That kid did not have top stats or ECs (and in general struggles with academics.) I think your daughter presents ON PAPER more like the latter kid. UMD is one of the cheaper flagship state schools. You will be hard pressed to find cheaper. Lots of brilliant kids there. Probably less brilliant kids at the lower tier SLACs that you can maybe afford. I’d go to instate public unless you think your kid really needs the small school to thrive. I know this wasn’t precisely your question but I hope done of my answer was helpful.

[Anonymous]

I went to CTY too and a second tier liberal arts college. I loved every minute, I was challenged in my classes and had a tribe of students like me (most on merit scholarships). I got into a top graduate program and graduated magna from the honors program.

It was an incredible experience and I would do it all over again.

[Anonymous]

My 10th grade son sounds really similar to your daughter. Like you, we won't be able to afford private schools. Maybe they'll find each other at a state university and become friends.

[Anonymous]

Honors college at a state school?