How is your gifted kid doing at a lower-ranked college?

[Anonymous]

She sounds really annoying TBH

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She should look at liberal arts colleges that give merit aid. You might be able to get close to what the state schools cost and she could have smaller classes.

We tried this route with our older kids, and they didn't get enough merit aid (even at much lower-ranked schools) to fill the gap. Our older kids went to state colleges purely because of price.

If anyone has a gifted kid who was/is happy at a lower-ranked school, please post. Thanks!

I have a DC who fits that profile. There are plenty of similar kids at his small, private university. They find each other. What would you like to know?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Try a school like Kenyon that has super generous merit aid and where she might be a competitive applicant,too. When we did the math, it was cheaper for my child to go there than the University of Michigan.

Thanks! I'll add that one to our wish list. I looked at Kenyon when I was applying to college. Paul Newman went there. A close friend of my husband went there too.

[Anonymous]

PP again. Sorry I did not answer your question. He is enjoying his college experience. He has great professors, small classes and is doing extremely well academically. He does grouse once in a while about the many “dumb” kids, but he’s found a solid cohort of like kids - those who did not want a large public university experience but could not afford the top ranked schools. He has a generous merit package and is very fortunate. The cost after merit aid ended up just about $10k more than our state flagship, and is well worth it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She should look at liberal arts colleges that give merit aid. You might be able to get close to what the state schools cost and she could have smaller classes.

We tried this route with our older kids, and they didn't get enough merit aid (even at much lower-ranked schools) to fill the gap. Our older kids went to state colleges purely because of price.

If anyone has a gifted kid who was/is happy at a lower-ranked school, please post. Thanks!

I have a DC who fits that profile. There are plenty of similar kids at his small, private university. They find each other. What would you like to know?

I guess I'd like to know if your kid is happy at his or her college. Does s/he feel challenged by the classes? Are there enough smart kids to make the class discussions interesting? Does s/he feel the classes are taught at his/her level? Does your DC respect the professors and the administrators of the college? How large is her group of similarly intellectually gifted peers? How did she find them? Does s/he feel comfortable at the school, like s/he fits in?

[Anonymous]

OP, my kids are still in high school, but here's my experience. Even in my decent but not stellar grad school, I thought that most of my peers weren't that bright when it came to deductive reasoning. However, some of them were much better worker bees! The quality of grad school matters. At the undergrad level, wherever you go, the work might not be that interesting.

I advise her to start planning to attend a top graduate school or equivalent. In undergrad, she has to learn to play the game - get the best gpa, talk to professors, figure out what she wants to specialize in, do some research or get an internship, if applicable. Get a perfect score on her GRE or LSAT or whatever. Then she will be poised to go to the
most intellectual graduate environment, with the most forward-thinking peers and professors.

[Anonymous]

CTY nevermore parent here since 4th grade. My D suffers from mental health issues. Went to a “lower” ranking SLAC for financial reasons (merit aid/FA). Transferred to an ivy. I couldn’t have afforded her SLAC without the merit aid. FA at ivies are generous (grants, no loan). FA grants are more than double what WashU gave - and affordable - so it was a no brainer. CTY classes are small discussion based. SLACs are similar.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No, she's not on the spectrum. A psychotherapist friend calls her a late bloomer, which may be the case. She's a kid who reads a four-hundred page book in an hour, yet she forgets to study for an English test. I don't know what you call that. Immaturity?

That sounds like my DD. Brilliant girl but hates math. I often wondered if she is dyslexic as she just seems so forgetful and careless. Sigh. I keep telling myself to give her the gift of time and let that maturity set in. She might be a diamond in the rough now (freshman in high school), but the day will come when she shines. We love her every crazy brilliant moments and those you-just-look-at-her-and-scratch-your-head moments.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:PP again. Sorry I did not answer your question. He is enjoying his college experience. He has great professors, small classes and is doing extremely well academically. He does grouse once in a while about the many “dumb” kids, but he’s found a solid cohort of like kids - those who did not want a large public university experience but could not afford the top ranked schools. He has a generous merit package and is very fortunate. The cost after merit aid ended up just about $10k more than our state flagship, and is well worth it.

We can't afford $10K over our state flagship. In our experience, merit aid doesn't match in-state tuition. There may be exceptions, and I'm eager to find them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Try a school like Kenyon that has super generous merit aid and where she might be a competitive applicant,too. When we did the math, it was cheaper for my child to go there than the University of Michigan.

Thanks! I'll add that one to our wish list. I looked at Kenyon when I was applying to college. Paul Newman went there. A close friend of my husband went there too.

Oberlin. Generous merit aid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, she's not on the spectrum. A psychotherapist friend calls her a late bloomer, which may be the case. She's a kid who reads a four-hundred page book in an hour, yet she forgets to study for an English test. I don't know what you call that. Immaturity?

I call that very, very obvious ADHD. Classic symptoms, in fact.
The hyperfocus part of ADHD means she gets lost in her book.
The inattentive part of ADHD means she forgets due dates and assignments.
It's sad you didn't catch on sooner, because she could have had a much better experience at school, and been much happier. Children with ADHD who are left to struggle on their own often because angry and frustrated, and are more likely to turn to self-medication with drugs or other undesirable activities.

You want to get her evaluated by a psychologist as soon as possible. Don't ask your pediatrician, they are not trained in that specialty.

(BTW, twice exceptional means gifted with disabilities, not necessarily Aspie. It can be dyslexia, ADHD, anxiety, whatever.)

She's been unhappy due to the isolation caused by the pandemic, so I had her evaluated. The psychotherapist said she's gifted and hypersensitive to stress, but no ADHD. She's fairly well organized. Forgetting to study for a test has only happened once or twice. She reads prodigiously.

We have wondered about our DD and haven’t had her evaluated yet. Do you mind sharing who your went to? And if you are happy with the service?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She sounds really annoying TBH

It's past your bedtime.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Try a school like Kenyon that has super generous merit aid and where she might be a competitive applicant,too. When we did the math, it was cheaper for my child to go there than the University of Michigan.

Thanks! I'll add that one to our wish list. I looked at Kenyon when I was applying to college. Paul Newman went there. A close friend of my husband went there too.

Oberlin. Generous merit aid.

Does it give nearly full rides? Because sticker price is 60K or something. Why anybody in their right mind would pay that much for Oberlin is beyond me.

[Anonymous]

I may have missed it somewhere but have you had actual IQ testing done?

[Anonymous]

1. She's not getting into a top college with that profile.

2. No undergrad is going to be interesting enough, so you might as well send her to your state school, and focus on transferring.

3. For that, she has to be get serious about getting better grades DESPITE an uninspiring work environment. That, too, is a skill she needs to master!