What is the age for a woman or man, that if you are not already married, you likely may never marry?

[Anonymous]

My college boyfriend is 40 now and not married. So this is interesting to me. I don’t know if he’s in a serious relationship or not.

[Anonymous]

My husband was 51 when we married (49 when we met). Now he's 59 and we have a three-year-old. In many ways he's the youngest dad on the playground. He's got a lot more energy than I do at 45.

[Anonymous]

40. By 40 both men and women are too set in their ways to adapt to any major life changes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do think 40 is sort of a milestone year where, married or not, you inevitably start contemplating the shape of your life. It's when a lot of people feel like they need to either pull the trigger or move on, in terms of marriage, kids, career change, where you live. There are exceptions, but when you turn 40, I can't tell you how much 50 feels right around the corner. In a way that 40 didn't feel so close when you turn 30 or even 35. 40 is like "Ok, I'm middle aged, this is what my life is -- I can make changes, but I'm not going to stumble into some big shift the way I might have before."

And that's what it is. You can get married past 40 (you can have kids past 40, a variety of ways), but it's not happening unless you make a conscious choice to make it happen. In a way this is much better than the way people often kind of land on marriage partners (or careers, or having kids) by accident if it happens younger. It's why people who marry later tend to stay married. You have to want it. I know a LOT of people who got married with misgivings at 30. Some stayed married, some didn't.

I don't know anyone who got married after 40 who didn't know exactly what they were doing and feel pretty damn certain that this was what they wanted for their future. Because... why? I'm sure it happens, especially with second or third marriages and certain people who just don't know how to be alone. But if you've been single your entire life, you aren't getting married after 40 unless it feels exactly right.

Your anecdotes do not disprove the data, which is that people who get married after age 32 have a higher divorce rate than people who marry between ages 25-32. Each year after 32, the likelihood of divorce increases by 5%.

As it turns out, it’s quite hard for people who are set in their ways to integrate lives.

I think this is untrue. I’m not sure where you got your data from. Most who marry before 30 end up divorced. Most who marry in their thirties have less of a chance getting a divorce. I know of many people who married young and were divorced by 30 or early 30’s, and then went on to have successful marriages. I also know many thirty-something’s who waited until their 30’s and they have successful marriages.

I am not that poster but the data about marrying at 32 or later increasing the chance of divorce is true. Early 20s high divorce rate as well. There is a sweet spot. But after 32, the chances of divorce are higher than a few years earlier. Here is one study:

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-3165920/Don-t-wait-walk-aisle-Couples-marry-age-32-likely-DIVORCE-odds-willl-worse-year.html

I don’t really believe these studies. Anything that comes from Dailymail is BS. I think most people who marry after 30 have a great chance of a strong marriage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do think 40 is sort of a milestone year where, married or not, you inevitably start contemplating the shape of your life. It's when a lot of people feel like they need to either pull the trigger or move on, in terms of marriage, kids, career change, where you live. There are exceptions, but when you turn 40, I can't tell you how much 50 feels right around the corner. In a way that 40 didn't feel so close when you turn 30 or even 35. 40 is like "Ok, I'm middle aged, this is what my life is -- I can make changes, but I'm not going to stumble into some big shift the way I might have before."

And that's what it is. You can get married past 40 (you can have kids past 40, a variety of ways), but it's not happening unless you make a conscious choice to make it happen. In a way this is much better than the way people often kind of land on marriage partners (or careers, or having kids) by accident if it happens younger. It's why people who marry later tend to stay married. You have to want it. I know a LOT of people who got married with misgivings at 30. Some stayed married, some didn't.

I don't know anyone who got married after 40 who didn't know exactly what they were doing and feel pretty damn certain that this was what they wanted for their future. Because... why? I'm sure it happens, especially with second or third marriages and certain people who just don't know how to be alone. But if you've been single your entire life, you aren't getting married after 40 unless it feels exactly right.

Your anecdotes do not disprove the data, which is that people who get married after age 32 have a higher divorce rate than people who marry between ages 25-32. Each year after 32, the likelihood of divorce increases by 5%.

As it turns out, it’s quite hard for people who are set in their ways to integrate lives.

I would also add that the OR hasn't given those late marriages time to reach the average 20 year mark for cracks to appear in their marriage. That would be around 60 years of age.

[Anonymous]

I have a college buddy who is getting married this year for the first time. He's 57. He was smart--he has slept with hundreds of women during the last 35 years.

A cousin married for the first time when he was 60, and then he had kids.