Older moms, tell me raising kids in DC will be fun/exciting for them?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This may blow your mind, but you can have an awesome childhood without participating in ANY way in sports. I did. If there were football games I never knew about them. My friends and I had no idea about school spirit - if there was "homecoming" I didn't know about it.

I was busy doing my hobbies and interests with my friends. I had a great time in high school. There's more than one way to have fun, OP.

My kid loves living in DC, but her life looks nothing like a sports-focused suburban high school. She's into writing, the arts, and science, and loves a lot of the cultural stuff -- museums, art, the international stuff available here -- but isn't into sports at all.

I grew up in a happy suburb and was into sports and ALL the things you mention. I know people who aren't athletes or into sports would like to think those of us who are blockheads, but most are incredibly smart, accomplished people. That's how they were able to focus on multiple interests. Unlik those who never heard of homecoming.

I didn't say athletes were dumb, but thanks for the gratuitous dig at kids who aren't as cool as you think you were. I literally only said that MY kid isn't into sports.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I am not focused literally on football, I was just using that as an example of the culture of my childhood being very into traditional teenage and school activities. School spirit, ALL sports (like, is lax big here in the same way where people get excited to go cheer for their team?), cheerleading, dance, marching band, whatever....going to the movies/mall with your friends (whatever the present version of this is), having parties, sleepovers, going to prom, even getting into a little (innocent) trouble, dating, etc.

Like, lighten up and help me understand the culture of the lives of tweens and teens here. That's all I'm asking.

For what it's worth, my big high school was EXTREMELY cut throat and competitive in ALL ways, including academics. I'm not worried about that as much as I'm worried about a culture of sheltered, boring, insecure, awkward kids who don't like to have fun at a time that should be so much fun.

What an absolutely nasty thing to say.

[Anonymous]

I can only speak for DC, not the suburbs. I went to public high school in DC and did lots of sports. However, there is NOT the sports culture of other (I assume more suburban and rural?) locations. Growing up in DC is about being independent and going all around the city with your friends on bikes or public transportation. Going to gogos (don't know if the HSs still have them?) and learning to love the music of DC. Having an intimate relationship with a city of power and all its grandeur and beauty by being super familiar with nationally recognized monuments/buildings/landscapes. Getting food from the carry-out and hanging out on the rec center fields. Protesting. Come driving age, cruising around and blasting music. Going to house parties and drinking. Learning Black, Ethiopian and Salvadoran culture.

[Anonymous]

DC and its surrounding near-suburbs are a place for the elite. Bethesda, for instance, is one of the best-educated communities in the United States. You have a professional elite intellectual class that is highly accomplished, spawning children that they are setting along the same path.

DC has more resources than you'd expect from a city of its size. It's not NYC, but it's got a huge amount of culture and a huge number of possible activities for children to participate in. Nobody obsesses about high school football because there are so MANY interesting things going on.

Now, if you want a locale whose top excitement is the progress of the local football team, and everyone is super into who is dating who in high school and other gossip (and the kids marry their high school sweethearts, so it matters), you're not going to find it here. Even if you move out to Loudoun, as some have suggested, that small-town insularity simply isn't present.

Furthermore, modern parenting is different. Childhood, especially for the children of upper-middle class professionals, is a more curated experience. It's not necessarily sheltered, but rather parents are more deliberate in seeking particular experiences for their kids. Most kids are not going to be allowed a lot of unsupervised partying. One, the kids are busy; they just don't have the time. Two, many parents are very responsible, which means that they will limit teenage access to alcohol and to what they view as bad peer influences.

Also, honestly, modern high school athletics are different. Training is intensive, especially at the high school level. Sports isn't an excuse to get together with buds and party hard; athletics involves a lot of work, and many sports require year-round training. Lots of different sports are available, so there's not an obsessive interest in just a single sport, like football (or lacrosse).

[Anonymous]

I remember reading a biography of Michael Eisner (long-time CEO of the Walt Disney Co). He grew up relatively wealthy in Manhattan, and went to elite schools. When he met Walt Disney (who grew up in Kansas and went to a public school), Eisner was so envious of Walt Disney having grown up in a smaller town and going to a public high school. I was pretty surprised to read that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DC and its surrounding near-suburbs are a place for the elite. Bethesda, for instance, is one of the best-educated communities in the United States. You have a professional elite intellectual class that is highly accomplished, spawning children that they are setting along the same path.

DC has more resources than you'd expect from a city of its size. It's not NYC, but it's got a huge amount of culture and a huge number of possible activities for children to participate in. Nobody obsesses about high school football because there are so MANY interesting things going on.

Now, if you want a locale whose top excitement is the progress of the local football team, and everyone is super into who is dating who in high school and other gossip (and the kids marry their high school sweethearts, so it matters), you're not going to find it here. Even if you move out to Loudoun, as some have suggested, that small-town insularity simply isn't present.

Furthermore, modern parenting is different. Childhood, especially for the children of upper-middle class professionals, is a more curated experience. It's not necessarily sheltered, but rather parents are more deliberate in seeking particular experiences for their kids. Most kids are not going to be allowed a lot of unsupervised partying. One, the kids are busy; they just don't have the time. Two, many parents are very responsible, which means that they will limit teenage access to alcohol and to what they view as bad peer influences.

Also, honestly, modern high school athletics are different. Training is intensive, especially at the high school level. Sports isn't an excuse to get together with buds and party hard; athletics involves a lot of work, and many sports require year-round training. Lots of different sports are available, so there's not an obsessive interest in just a single sport, like football (or lacrosse).

Bethesda is elite. I've heard it all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I am not focused literally on football, I was just using that as an example of the culture of my childhood being very into traditional teenage and school activities. School spirit, ALL sports (like, is lax big here in the same way where people get excited to go cheer for their team?), cheerleading, dance, marching band, whatever....going to the movies/mall with your friends (whatever the present version of this is), having parties, sleepovers, going to prom, even getting into a little (innocent) trouble, dating, etc.

Like, lighten up and help me understand the culture of the lives of tweens and teens here. That's all I'm asking.

For what it's worth, my big high school was EXTREMELY cut throat and competitive in ALL ways, including academics. I'm not worried about that as much as I'm worried about a culture of sheltered, boring, insecure, awkward kids who don't like to have fun at a time that should be so much fun.

What an absolutely nasty thing to say.

I think it’s valid. Private schools here esp coddle the students. Total echo chambers of urban liberal liberal arts drones. Prob can’t even change a tire or march in a parade.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I am not focused literally on football, I was just using that as an example of the culture of my childhood being very into traditional teenage and school activities. School spirit, ALL sports (like, is lax big here in the same way where people get excited to go cheer for their team?), cheerleading, dance, marching band, whatever....going to the movies/mall with your friends (whatever the present version of this is), having parties, sleepovers, going to prom, even getting into a little (innocent) trouble, dating, etc.

Like, lighten up and help me understand the culture of the lives of tweens and teens here. That's all I'm asking.

For what it's worth, my big high school was EXTREMELY cut throat and competitive in ALL ways, including academics. I'm not worried about that as much as I'm worried about a culture of sheltered, boring, insecure, awkward kids who don't like to have fun at a time that should be so much fun.

What an absolutely nasty thing to say.

I think it’s valid. Private schools here esp coddle the students. Total echo chambers of urban liberal liberal arts drones. Prob can’t even change a tire or march in a parade.

Truth hurts.

[Anonymous]

We moved to DC from a "fun" city in the South where our daughters previously went to football games with their friends on Friday nights (pre-Covid). I could not get out of there fast enough. The football culture in general in horrifying and the cheerleading turned my stomach. In fact it was one of the biggest drivers for us to leave.
I agree that you will not find this in DC and I for one am grateful. There are plenty of other ways for kids to have fun, it all just depends what your definition of fun is.

[Anonymous]

I grew up in Northwest DC and went to a big three. I did not have fun in high school. It was exhausting and stressful and not fun. I worked so hard I averaged 5 to 6 hours of sleep a night. Sorry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You sound very immature. Basically you’re saying high school is not fun if it’s not like “Friday Night Lights?”

Yeah, I sort of am wondering that. Basically, what is the culture of high school here? And growing up here in general?

Working hard at school, studying hard for the SATs, and doing lots of extracurriculars that you can put on your college brag sheet for your college applications. No, football is not a big part of school here.

[Anonymous]

It is hard to stand out with so many successful kids and the lack of academic diversity. You can have fun HS experiences if you value the whole education not just the academics

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I am not focused literally on football, I was just using that as an example of the culture of my childhood being very into traditional teenage and school activities. School spirit, ALL sports (like, is lax big here in the same way where people get excited to go cheer for their team?), cheerleading, dance, marching band, whatever....going to the movies/mall with your friends (whatever the present version of this is), having parties, sleepovers, going to prom, even getting into a little (innocent) trouble, dating, etc.

Like, lighten up and help me understand the culture of the lives of tweens and teens here. That's all I'm asking.

For what it's worth, my big high school was EXTREMELY cut throat and competitive in ALL ways, including academics. I'm not worried about that as much as I'm worried about a culture of sheltered, boring, insecure, awkward kids who don't like to have fun at a time that should be so much fun.

I posted before. I went to a big three. Your last sentence pretty much sums up the scene here. No, it’s not fun.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What is it like to raise kids here long term? Do kids get a fun high school experience?

I grew up in suburban Miami. I had such a fun childhood. High school football games were epic. School spirit was off the charts. Artists/rappers repped Miami in songs. People went crazy for our sports teams. There was just so much culture, and people were so friendly and cool and chill and funny.

My husband and I both moved here straight from college. We've lived here 10-12 years. Have one kid. Just bought our first house. I love DC weather and we have great friends here, good jobs, etc., but I'm worried that raising kids here will be so dull and so unlike our childhoods (husband is from TX, same story I describe -- loved HS). Our kid is very little but we will probably go to public elementary school and then look at the NWDC private schools for middle and high school (which, again, is so different from my husband's and my big, public high school experiences, and we're coming to terms with that, too, but that's a different topic).

So tell me, how is it with kids here over the long term? Is high school a fun and exciting time? Like, is it fun and cool to "come of age" in DC? Is it fun to go to football games and school events?

People here get as crazed about “academic rigor” as they do in Florida and Texas about athletics. And the school sports that get people excited up here are BORING.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So far these responses are telling me everything I need to know. Cool.

You’re quick. We have kids in an independent up here. It takes some getting used to. You’ll be fine though. Just smile politely and chuckle inside.