Heartbroken

[Anonymous]

OP, I was in your shoes, angry and confused when the breakup came.

-- time is the great healer. You will never completely forget her, but she won't be part of your daily thoughts.

-- cold turkey, no contact, no social media.

-- keep busy. I had just started business school, which had me occupied.

-- now that she's gone, don't put her on a pedestal. Nobody is perfect, including this woman.

- I found that hooking up with other women wasn't a cure. Not my style anyway.
-- go to the gym. Become what you want, not what you perceive women to want.

Eventually I had serious relationships with two other women, met another that could have been, and then my wife came along. You'll be fine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t want to offer you false hope, but I will say pretty much every single break up I ever went through went a couple rounds before it was really over.

It’s not unusual for people to have a change of heart.

She might be back if you give her some space.

My experience has been that reuniting after a breakup doesn't work. The weight of the past that I didn't like, or he didn't, always returned to end the relationship, and it just made the final breakup more painful.

I’m the PP. I mean yeah most of the time I think that’s true. Sometimes it ends up working out though. DH and I broke up a couple times before we got married, but now we are OK. Every once in awhile things work out.

Same here. We had a long on and off period, but eventually got back together and have been married for almost 30 years. So, you never know- it really depends on the people and what’s going on in their lives.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t want to offer you false hope, but I will say pretty much every single break up I ever went through went a couple rounds before it was really over.

It’s not unusual for people to have a change of heart.

She might be back if you give her some space.

My experience has been that reuniting after a breakup doesn't work. The weight of the past that I didn't like, or he didn't, always returned to end the relationship, and it just made the final breakup more painful.

I’m the PP. I mean yeah most of the time I think that’s true. Sometimes it ends up working out though. DH and I broke up a couple times before we got married, but now we are OK. Every once in awhile things work out.

Same here. We had a long on and off period, but eventually got back together and have been married for almost 30 years. So, you never know- it really depends on the people and what’s going on in their lives.

Don't give OP false hope. The great majority stay broken up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I was in your shoes, angry and confused when the breakup came.

-- time is the great healer. You will never completely forget her, but she won't be part of your daily thoughts.

-- cold turkey, no contact, no social media.

-- keep busy. I had just started business school, which had me occupied.

-- now that she's gone, don't put her on a pedestal. Nobody is perfect, including this woman.

- I found that hooking up with other women wasn't a cure. Not my style anyway.
-- go to the gym. Become what you want, not what you perceive women to want.

Eventually I had serious relationships with two other women, met another that could have been, and then my wife came along. You'll be fine.

Thank you...this is by far the best advice so far. I have an incredible job and I just started my own business. I'm going to concentrate on growing the business (that has already taken off really well) and going to be hitting the gym like crazy. Of course I hope she will return to my life, but I'm not counting on it. It would be nice to have someone to talk about all this with, because this is something I just can't talk about with the guys at work. And yes, I'm going to try to find a decent therapist as well. Going to try to get lost in taking care of everything in my life (selling my beach house in Delaware in case anybody is interested!). lol I've never been a yoga kind of guy, (more into lifting weights) but I started doing yoga with my ex, and I think I'm going to keep doing it.
Seriously though, I'm extremely touched by the outpouring of words and thoughts from everyone. Thank you