Returned college students as “mother’s helpers”?

[Anonymous]

No, OP. You’re at home - you’ll find away to deal with your children and work the same as we all will. Do not expose or be exposed to another person when it’s not vitally necessary.

Just do the right thing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:With all the college students returning home after campus closures, it seems like a natural fit to hire someone to help with the kids while parents telework/ go into the office. Obviously they’ll eventually have remote coursework to do, but I’d think they could at least provide part-time help.

Are there drawbacks I’m not thinking of? Of course, it would need to be someone you trusted to take good preventive measures outside your house as well.

You sound really entitled to expect them to provide child care. Its not their responsibility to care for your kids, its yours. They still have a full course load and responsibilities to school.

Many students are advertising their availability for babysitting on the neighborhood list serves. No one is forcing anyone to accept the job. Better to have the same neighbor college student or nanny coming over daily than to send the kids to a group child care setting. For various reasons, many parents don’t have the option to “refuse” to work, as someone suggested.

It’s a public health issue! We are socially distancing for the greater good and to get past this thing faster!

Christ, why are some of you so dim-witted!?

Please watch your language and calm down. You really need to relax. Why don't you do everyone and yourself a favor and stay off these boards for a while. It's obviously getting you super spun up. I don't know if you think it's somehow helping to argue with people on here, but it's not. It's divisive and not what we need at a time like this.[/quote]

To PP above in bold: DP and not the person to whom you're responding, but....

I agree that the "dim-witted" comment above wasn't useful, but I also wonder if you're the same person who posted on another thread that someone else should "relax" and calm down and try yoga etc. because you deemed them too spun up--?

It's very condescending to tell people to calm down, stay off the boards, "do yourself a favor" etc. If you want calm, cool discussion you should know that DCUM is not necessarily the place for that and that right now. There's an abundance of self-centered posters blithely looking for permission to do as they please: "Should I hire a college student" and "can I take my kids to the playground" and "can I let my teens go to the mall" (all real threads here) are coming from people who are going to make the situation in this region worse for all of us.

Sorry if that seems "spun up" to you, but some of us here are frustrated with the lack of understanding and abundance of ignorance we see here. And calling that out is necessary.

PP, and yes I am. There are people on these boards literally saying to others "how will your kids feel when you die" because those individuals are making choices they disagree with. Look, I know DCUM tends to be full of grown-up mean girls. I get it. But there are people who are way more spun up than they need to be and they're only going to spin others up. Panicking is not going to help anyone right now. It's the worst way to deal with this. We should be coming together as a community. I did not mean to be condescending. I think it would be a favor/gift to yourself if you are so worried to stay off of the internet and take a break from it for a while. I stand by my comments. They were far nicer than most of the other comments I've read on here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Here’s a drawback: you are potentially spreading the virus and endangering your family and the college kid. Take care of your own children and stay away from other people!


Why can’t people understand this?

We’re creating smaller social circles. Some parents have to work. Better to have one young person in the house providing care, than having the child go to a large group environment. Some of our changes have to be incremental. We can’t all be quarantined for the next two months or however long this will take.

Yes, some parents have to work out of the house. OP isn’t one of them.

I’ve done WAH for many years. It is difficult to get anything done with little kids in the house. Sure, a mother’s helper is an imperfect solution, but it’s much better than the alternative of sending the kids to a group setting. We can’t all stop working for months on end. It’s not going to happen. Stop bashing people for doing what they can in the current circumstances.

Nonsense! For two to eight weeks you can stagger your schedules. I’m getting up at 4AM to get three hours in before my kids wake up. And am working long after they go to bed.

If you care so little to send your kids to some group care that is in place for essential personnel not able to work from home (doctors, nurses, cops, et all)
You are simply a bad, selfish person

Except if you are a single parent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Here’s a drawback: you are potentially spreading the virus and endangering your family and the college kid. Take care of your own children and stay away from other people!


Why can’t people understand this?

Why cant you understand that some people have to work and can't do that and take care of children at the same time?

You have to figure out a way. With your spouses and bosses - you have to find away. You cannot be this selfish and irresponsible, OP.

Should all the health care workers stay home with their kids?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:With HS and college students, I would worry that are socializing with their friends when they aren't with you. That would be my main concern. Their idea of social isolation is probably not mine.

This exactly. And then these people are also doing play dates and going to the playground. It’s not going to work like that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s fine IMO. Our nanny is still coming over. We trust her to limit her social contact and we don’t have any elderly people in the house. College students parents are what - late 40s to mid 50s? I read an article that it’s okay to maintain contact with one other healthy family if you trust them to follow the rules. So if you do this, pick someone trustworthy and paranoid.

How do you define her limiting her social contact? Have you asked her about this? Does she define it the same way?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Here’s a drawback: you are potentially spreading the virus and endangering your family and the college kid. Take care of your own children and stay away from other people!


Why can’t people understand this?

Why cant you understand that some people have to work and can't do that and take care of children at the same time?

You have to figure out a way. With your spouses and bosses - you have to find away. You cannot be this selfish and irresponsible, OP.

Should all the health care workers stay home with their kids?

NP. I’ll say this loudly so you can hear it in the back - THIS IS NOT ABOUT HEALTHCARE WORKERS.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Here’s a drawback: you are potentially spreading the virus and endangering your family and the college kid. Take care of your own children and stay away from other people!


Why can’t people understand this?

Why cant you understand that some people have to work and can't do that and take care of children at the same time?

Everyone is in the same boat. Don't bring the possibility of the virus into your home. A college student has contact with hundreds of others. Thos is not a solution to your problem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Here’s a drawback: you are potentially spreading the virus and endangering your family and the college kid. Take care of your own children and stay away from other people!


Why can’t people understand this?

Why cant you understand that some people have to work and can't do that and take care of children at the same time?

You have to figure out a way. With your spouses and bosses - you have to find away. You cannot be this selfish and irresponsible, OP.

Should all the health care workers stay home with their kids?

NP. I’ll say this loudly so you can hear it in the back - THIS IS NOT ABOUT HEALTHCARE WORKERS.

I have to go into the office tomorrow. I am part time and get no sick time or vacation time or leave of ANY KIND. But I do get health insurance for the whole family.

SO there is no calling out sick for people like me. I have been told I can only work from home if I have an actual fever.

That's the world for many of us, not like so many spoiled princesses on this DCUM.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s fine IMO. Our nanny is still coming over. We trust her to limit her social contact and we don’t have any elderly people in the house. College students parents are what - late 40s to mid 50s? I read an article that it’s okay to maintain contact with one other healthy family if you trust them to follow the rules. So if you do this, pick someone trustworthy and paranoid.

How do you define her limiting her social contact? Have you asked her about this? Does she define it the same way?

You can appear and feel healthy and still carry the virus.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Here’s a drawback: you are potentially spreading the virus and endangering your family and the college kid. Take care of your own children and stay away from other people!


Why can’t people understand this?

Why cant you understand that some people have to work and can't do that and take care of children at the same time?

You have to figure out a way. With your spouses and bosses - you have to find away. You cannot be this selfish and irresponsible, OP.

Should all the health care workers stay home with their kids?

NP. I’ll say this loudly so you can hear it in the back - THIS IS NOT ABOUT HEALTHCARE WORKERS.

I personally know 10 dual healthcare worker families. They are the families most freaked out about childcare. Many of us can cobble something together. I hate working at home while caring for my kid, but it's a fine solution for now. If both parents have to report, hiring a college student is an acceptable idea.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s fine IMO. Our nanny is still coming over. We trust her to limit her social contact and we don’t have any elderly people in the house. College students parents are what - late 40s to mid 50s? I read an article that it’s okay to maintain contact with one other healthy family if you trust them to follow the rules. So if you do this, pick someone trustworthy and paranoid.

How do you define her limiting her social contact? Have you asked her about this? Does she define it the same way?

You can appear and feel healthy and still carry the virus.

I am aware of that. We are not having our nanny come anymore because her husband works outside the house and it’s not worth the risk to us. We will take turns taking care of the kids and use leave until we have to start taking leave without pay. I was questioning PP’s decision. I think it’s risky.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:With all the college students returning home after campus closures, it seems like a natural fit to hire someone to help with the kids while parents telework/ go into the office. Obviously they’ll eventually have remote coursework to do, but I’d think they could at least provide part-time help.

Are there drawbacks I’m not thinking of? Of course, it would need to be someone you trusted to take good preventive measures outside your house as well.

You sound really entitled to expect them to provide child care. Its not their responsibility to care for your kids, its yours. They still have a full course load and responsibilities to school.

Many students are advertising their availability for babysitting on the neighborhood list serves. No one is forcing anyone to accept the job. Better to have the same neighbor college student or nanny coming over daily than to send the kids to a group child care setting. For various reasons, many parents don’t have the option to “refuse” to work, as someone suggested.

It’s a public health issue! We are socially distancing for the greater good and to get past this thing faster!

Christ, why are some of you so dim-witted!?

Please watch your language and calm down. You really need to relax. Why don't you do everyone and yourself a favor and stay off these boards for a while. It's obviously getting you super spun up. I don't know if you think it's somehow helping to argue with people on here, but it's not. It's divisive and not what we need at a time like this.

You are insufferable.