Returned college students as “mother’s helpers”?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:With all the college students returning home after campus closures, it seems like a natural fit to hire someone to help with the kids while parents telework/ go into the office. Obviously they’ll eventually have remote coursework to do, but I’d think they could at least provide part-time help.

Are there drawbacks I’m not thinking of? Of course, it would need to be someone you trusted to take good preventive measures outside your house as well.

You sound really entitled to expect them to provide child care. Its not their responsibility to care for your kids, its yours. They still have a full course load and responsibilities to school.

Many students are advertising their availability for babysitting on the neighborhood list serves. No one is forcing anyone to accept the job. Better to have the same neighbor college student or nanny coming over daily than to send the kids to a group child care setting. For various reasons, many parents don’t have the option to “refuse” to work, as someone suggested.

It’s a public health issue! We are socially distancing for the greater good and to get past this thing faster!

Christ, why are some of you so dim-witted!?

Because limiting yourself to a single caregiver is social-distancing, and far preferable to having to put your child in a group care situation. We are not under quarantine, we are limiting social interactions. Having childcare can still be consistent with limiting social interactions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s fine IMO. Our nanny is still coming over. We trust her to limit her social contact and we don’t have any elderly people in the house. College students parents are what - late 40s to mid 50s? I read an article that it’s okay to maintain contact with one other healthy family if you trust them to follow the rules. So if you do this, pick someone trustworthy and paranoid.

Not around here.

I'm 44. My oldest is 20 and in college, I had him when I was 24. If you read DCUM regularly you'll see that I am basically the same as a teenage mom in the eyes of most psters here. At 44, my oldest child should be about 2 or 3 years old to be "acceptable."

So in DCUM land, most college parents are in their late 50's at the youngest.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:With all the college students returning home after campus closures, it seems like a natural fit to hire someone to help with the kids while parents telework/ go into the office. Obviously they’ll eventually have remote coursework to do, but I’d think they could at least provide part-time help.

Are there drawbacks I’m not thinking of? Of course, it would need to be someone you trusted to take good preventive measures outside your house as well.

You sound really entitled to expect them to provide child care. Its not their responsibility to care for your kids, its yours. They still have a full course load and responsibilities to school.

Many students are advertising their availability for babysitting on the neighborhood list serves. No one is forcing anyone to accept the job. Better to have the same neighbor college student or nanny coming over daily than to send the kids to a group child care setting. For various reasons, many parents don’t have the option to “refuse” to work, as someone suggested.

It’s a public health issue! We are socially distancing for the greater good and to get past this thing faster!

Christ, why are some of you so dim-witted!?

Please watch your language and calm down. You really need to relax. Why don't you do everyone and yourself a favor and stay off these boards for a while. It's obviously getting you super spun up. I don't know if you think it's somehow helping to argue with people on here, but it's not. It's divisive and not what we need at a time like this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:With all the college students returning home after campus closures, it seems like a natural fit to hire someone to help with the kids while parents telework/ go into the office. Obviously they’ll eventually have remote coursework to do, but I’d think they could at least provide part-time help.

Are there drawbacks I’m not thinking of? Of course, it would need to be someone you trusted to take good preventive measures outside your house as well.

You sound really entitled to expect them to provide child care. Its not their responsibility to care for your kids, its yours. They still have a full course load and responsibilities to school.

Many students are advertising their availability for babysitting on the neighborhood list serves. No one is forcing anyone to accept the job. Better to have the same neighbor college student or nanny coming over daily than to send the kids to a group child care setting. For various reasons, many parents don’t have the option to “refuse” to work, as someone suggested.

It’s a public health issue! We are socially distancing for the greater good and to get past this thing faster!

Christ, why are some of you so dim-witted!?

Because limiting yourself to a single caregiver is social-distancing, and far preferable to having to put your child in a group care situation. We are not under quarantine, we are limiting social interactions. Having childcare can still be consistent with limiting social interactions.

This sounds very reasonable to me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s fine IMO. Our nanny is still coming over. We trust her to limit her social contact and we don’t have any elderly people in the house. College students parents are what - late 40s to mid 50s? I read an article that it’s okay to maintain contact with one other healthy family if you trust them to follow the rules. So if you do this, pick someone trustworthy and paranoid.

What you and so many here are not understanding is this: Even if you limit contact with this "one other healthy family" whom you "trust to follow the rules," that may not matter at all, and you cannot know.

Your healthy family or their healthy family might have been exposed already and not yet showing symptoms. People can transmit the virus while they are not symptomatic.

There is another thread on DCUM about having playdates while schools are shut. Of course many posters said to go for it. Then one noted that her family was limiting contact and playdates to one other trusted family. And now someone in that other family turns out to have been exposed earlier so, quarantine, I guess. The poster noted that just assuming everyone is fine and limiting yourself to seeing/interacting with one other household does not necessarily work.

By the way, re: other posts above: I do get that some people must go to work outside the home. But the posters coming here to cry, "would you deny child care to physicians and nurses?!" so indignantly KNOW that is not what anyone here is saying. We are not talking about those kinds of truly urgently needed jobs. We're talking about DCUM parents who come here to say things should be done "incrementally" and they can't work at home with their kids running around. Unless their jobs are vital health and safety work -- which they would not be doing at home anyway -- they can deal. A poster somewhere said she and her husband will take shifts, she's getting up extremely early to work until the kids are up,, she works when they go to bed, etc. It can be done and IS being done by the non-whining people. And YES, before someone leaps in to say, "But what about single parents trying to work at home? They should get outside help to come in" etc. -- This. Is. Not. Forever.

[Anonymous]

This brings two groups of incubators together: young kids and college age young adults (most have a looser interpretation of isolating). Then they can bring it home to their older parents. It’s a tough situation but I don’t know if this is the solution

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:With all the college students returning home after campus closures, it seems like a natural fit to hire someone to help with the kids while parents telework/ go into the office. Obviously they’ll eventually have remote coursework to do, but I’d think they could at least provide part-time help.

Are there drawbacks I’m not thinking of? Of course, it would need to be someone you trusted to take good preventive measures outside your house as well.

You sound really entitled to expect them to provide child care. Its not their responsibility to care for your kids, its yours. They still have a full course load and responsibilities to school.

Many students are advertising their availability for babysitting on the neighborhood list serves. No one is forcing anyone to accept the job. Better to have the same neighbor college student or nanny coming over daily than to send the kids to a group child care setting. For various reasons, many parents don’t have the option to “refuse” to work, as someone suggested.

It’s a public health issue! We are socially distancing for the greater good and to get past this thing faster!

Christ, why are some of you so dim-witted!?

Please watch your language and calm down. You really need to relax. Why don't you do everyone and yourself a favor and stay off these boards for a while. It's obviously getting you super spun up. I don't know if you think it's somehow helping to argue with people on here, but it's not. It's divisive and not what we need at a time like this.[/quote]

To PP above in bold: DP and not the person to whom you're responding, but....

I agree that the "dim-witted" comment above wasn't useful, but I also wonder if you're the same person who posted on another thread that someone else should "relax" and calm down and try yoga etc. because you deemed them too spun up--?

It's very condescending to tell people to calm down, stay off the boards, "do yourself a favor" etc. If you want calm, cool discussion you should know that DCUM is not necessarily the place for that and that right now. There's an abundance of self-centered posters blithely looking for permission to do as they please: "Should I hire a college student" and "can I take my kids to the playground" and "can I let my teens go to the mall" (all real threads here) are coming from people who are going to make the situation in this region worse for all of us.

Sorry if that seems "spun up" to you, but some of us here are frustrated with the lack of understanding and abundance of ignorance we see here. And calling that out is necessary.

[Anonymous]

Everyone should be “spun up”. We want to get past thing as soon as possible and not have it dragged out and more deadly because some spoiled mothers who are home can’t entertain their own kids!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:With all the college students returning home after campus closures, it seems like a natural fit to hire someone to help with the kids while parents telework/ go into the office. Obviously they’ll eventually have remote coursework to do, but I’d think they could at least provide part-time help.

Are there drawbacks I’m not thinking of? Of course, it would need to be someone you trusted to take good preventive measures outside your house as well.

Yes. A huge one. I do not want my children exposed anymore than necessary. They are not home for a vacation but because of a serious health emergency. Take vacation time and take care of your children who are your responsibility!!!!!!!!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Here’s a drawback: you are potentially spreading the virus and endangering your family and the college kid. Take care of your own children and stay away from other people!


Why can’t people understand this?

Why cant you understand that some people have to work and can't do that and take care of children at the same time?

They can use their vacation and dick leave.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, the drawback is that you should be practicing social distancing.

Lol.

[Anonymous]

The poor will do what they need to for financial reasons. No college student wants to take care of your kids unless they are living with you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Everyone should be “spun up”. We want to get past thing as soon as possible and not have it dragged out and more deadly because some spoiled mothers who are home can’t entertain their own kids!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Here’s a drawback: you are potentially spreading the virus and endangering your family and the college kid. Take care of your own children and stay away from other people!


Why can’t people understand this?

Why can't people understand that some of us HAVE to go to work. It's not a choice.

No. You can refuse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Here’s a drawback: you are potentially spreading the virus and endangering your family and the college kid. Take care of your own children and stay away from other people!


Why can’t people understand this?

Why cant you understand that some people have to work and can't do that and take care of children at the same time?

You have to figure out a way. With your spouses and bosses - you have to find away. You cannot be this selfish and irresponsible, OP.

Excuse me. Tell that to the two-physician or emergency responder families. Are you calling them selfish and irresponsible for putting their own lives at risk for others?

This is their job and they knew this when they chose their vocation whereas a lawyer is not a first responder and no reason why non-emergrncy people can stay home.