What to do - Coach's son gets more playing time than teammates....

[Anonymous]

This is not a parent volunteer, he is part of the coaching staff.

There is a reason why good clubs will not allow paid staff coaches to coach their own children. I remember the drama when Lily and Cindy had to separate to go to McLean and how it worked out better for them both that the club didn't make the exception.

If your son is on this team with friends and wants to stay you really have no choice but option C, STFU and deal with it for now. Perhaps if the topic comes up and the moment is right you can lightly suggest that playing the weaker players more may help them catch up but don't expect them to hear you if they don't already know that. If later on your son gets serious enough about soccer that he wants the best environment for his growth even if it means separating from his friends then you will need to find him a club that also takes soccer more seriously and would not allow this scenario to happen.

If you want to help those players on the squad who are getting the short end of the stick, find a good trainer and set up a weekly small group (4 players) training session and invite them to join your son in the small group. If your son really is one of the better players and they really do love soccer they will probably jump at the chance and all of them will be much better off for it whether with this team or another.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

This is not a parent volunteer, he is part of the coaching staff.

There is a reason why good clubs will not allow paid staff coaches to coach their own children. I remember the drama when Lily and Cindy had to separate to go to McLean and how it worked out better for them both that the club didn't make the exception.

If your son is on this team with friends and wants to stay you really have no choice but option C, STFU and deal with it for now. Perhaps if the topic comes up and the moment is right you can lightly suggest that playing the weaker players more may help them catch up but don't expect them to hear you if they don't already know that. If later on your son gets serious enough about soccer that he wants the best environment for his growth even if it means separating from his friends then you will need to find him a club that also takes soccer more seriously and would not allow this scenario to happen.

If you want to help those players on the squad who are getting the short end of the stick, find a good trainer and set up a weekly small group (4 players) training session and invite them to join your son in the small group. If your son really is one of the better players and they really do love soccer they will probably jump at the chance and all of them will be much better off for it whether with this team or another.

Don't you dare suggest on this forum that kids who don't get the same amount of playing time that they train more away from practice.

[Anonymous]

My son once had a coach who favored the kids with hot moms (not me!). DS once scored a hat trick and the jerk didn’t even notice or tell him good job.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My son once had a coach who favored the kids with hot moms (not me!). DS once scored a hat trick and the jerk didn’t even notice or tell him good job.

Time to up your game. Joking

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP said the son comes out "rarely" and for "short periods" I don't understand the beef, but if you can do a better job why don't you coach.

Sorry, not helpful. I am trying to find a good solution; my son is not leaving the team, these are his friends, and it's good training. He, the Coach, and Coach's son are friends (think bday parties and sleep-overs);

So my two options as I see it are to ask one of the less vocal parent to talk to Coach; I talk to Coach, or I STFU.

I'm leaning towards S'ingTFU - this will play itself out; Coach will be exposed or he will adjust. My son gets playing time and is one of the better players - I'm actually less worried about him. When I notice what I perceive to be an injustice it raises my hackles. The fact that I notice a play time injustice on a soccerteam with 10yos makes my blood boil; A better coach will coach a team to play together, not rely on his son and other role players.

Thanks for your input Soccer DCUM.

. This scenario drives me crazy as well! Not fair at all but unfortunately it’s the way it is. I agree it’s a cycle. The good players get time and chances to develop and improve while the others sit and hope to play . Ugh. Maybe instead of talking to the coach you could talk to a technical director about this? I wouldn’t talk to the coach myself. But I would consider talking to somebody higher up

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP said the son comes out "rarely" and for "short periods" I don't understand the beef, but if you can do a better job why don't you coach.

Sorry, not helpful. I am trying to find a good solution; my son is not leaving the team, these are his friends, and it's good training. He, the Coach, and Coach's son are friends (think bday parties and sleep-overs);

So my two options as I see it are to ask one of the less vocal parent to talk to Coach; I talk to Coach, or I STFU.

I'm leaning towards S'ingTFU - this will play itself out; Coach will be exposed or he will adjust. My son gets playing time and is one of the better players - I'm actually less worried about him. When I notice what I perceive to be an injustice it raises my hackles. The fact that I notice a play time injustice on a soccerteam with 10yos makes my blood boil; A better coach will coach a team to play together, not rely on his son and other role players.

Thanks for your input Soccer DCUM.

. This scenario drives me crazy as well! Not fair at all but unfortunately it’s the way it is. I agree it’s a cycle. The good players get time and chances to develop and improve while the others sit and hope to play . Ugh. Maybe instead of talking to the coach you could talk to a technical director about this? I wouldn’t talk to the coach myself. But I would consider talking to somebody higher up

True that the TD should be the one to solve this but if the TD is putting paid staff coaches in charge of their own kids it is more likely that in this case the TD is the problem at that club not the solution.