Can’t afford to take care of my child anymore

[Anonymous]

Op here again

This is a bit of a vent

I just feel isolated and alone. Every person around me either has a spouse or active other parent. Lots of SAHM in the area, I just don’t fit in and can’t really tell them how bad I’m doing so I stay to myself

[Anonymous]

Does you 9 year old have a best friend? If there are a lot of SAHMs in your area, a good friend’s mom might be fine having your daughter after school - at least a couple days per week. Growing up I knew kids who stayed with friends after school - they liked it a lot better than aftercare (I think aftercare has improved a lot since I was a kid).

[Anonymous]

I know APS advertises that they will work with parents who can't afford before or after care.

I'd ask your school's program and, if that fails, the PTA.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know APS advertises that they will work with parents who can't afford before or after care.

I'd ask your school's program and, if that fails, the PTA.

I second this. Connect with the parent liaison at your child's school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know APS advertises that they will work with parents who can't afford before or after care.

I'd ask your school's program and, if that fails, the PTA.

I second this. Connect with the parent liaison at your child's school.

+1 or your school counselor. They can help connect you to resources.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Gov shutdown really messed me up

I have no one

Go to your local churches, synagogues, or any religious organization. Red Cross has emergency assistance.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op here again

This is a bit of a vent

I just feel isolated and alone. Every person around me either has a spouse or active other parent. Lots of SAHM in the area, I just don’t fit in and can’t really tell them how bad I’m doing so I stay to myself

You're not alone. I'm a single parent too. The key is to build your village. It got MUCH easier for me when DD started public school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op here again

This is a bit of a vent

I just feel isolated and alone. Every person around me either has a spouse or active other parent. Lots of SAHM in the area, I just don’t fit in and can’t really tell them how bad I’m doing so I stay to myself

You are not alone. And you've made the first step to getting back on track by reaching out. Even if it is reaching out on an anonymous message board, you have had people respond, so you are not alone.

You are facing eviction, but there may be better alternatives for you and your daughter than where you currently live. There may be services for food and clothing that will help you pour more money into moving to a more affordable location. There may be support services that are free that you can get to help you with your depression.

Now, to get started on finding some resources for you, just answer a few questions:
- where do you live? This will help people find resources local to you
- where do you work? This will help people provide alternatives that you can afford that may not involve such a long commute
- what is your budget, e.g. how much do you bring in a month? Do you have an external expenses (like student loans, a car loan, etc) that have to be taken into account?

Sending good thoughts out to you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, please update. What kind of help do you need? paying for rent/mortgage, food?

Op here

I don’t know what I’m going to do

I need a crisis line , need someone to talk to

Yes I’m about to face eviction, I’m trying to get help, yes i Have a job and no I don’t trust my child to fend for herself.

I just don’t have outside resources.

I just don’t want this life anymore, tired being a single mom with all responsibility on me at all times and I’m barely making it

Crisis line: https://www.crisistextline.org/texting-in

Salvation Army Emergency Assistance: http://salvationarmynca.org/ways-we-help/families-in-need/
They can provide assistance with rent, utilities, food, transportation costs and more.

I hope you reach out and get the help you need, OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know APS advertises that they will work with parents who can't afford before or after care.

I'd ask your school's program and, if that fails, the PTA.

I second this. Connect with the parent liaison at your child's school.

+1 or your school counselor. They can help connect you to resources.

I agree on the school counselor. At our school, the PTA sets money aside for situations like this but the counselor is the one who coordinates efforts. PTA does not know to whom the assistance is being given to protect the student's privacy.

[Anonymous]

OP, you sound very depressed and sad. It is not hopeless. It's hard, but do one thing at a time. Call the crisis line the PP posted. Talk to someone, then do the next thing, maybe call a food pantry, or talk to someone at your child's school, or ask a neighbor or your child's best friend's mom if your DD can stay with her after school until you get home. You can do this, just take it one small step at a time. Good luck to you, OP. It will get better if you just take the first small step.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op here again

This is a bit of a vent

I just feel isolated and alone. Every person around me either has a spouse or active other parent. Lots of SAHM in the area, I just don’t fit in and can’t really tell them how bad I’m doing so I stay to myself

Where do you live? I'm a single parent of two teenagers, and yes, it's not always easy, but please let us help you.

[Anonymous]

OP, I feel terrible for you. I had a friend a lifetime ago that was in your situation but she did not want any help and took a long time to take action. Things could have been minimized with quicker action. But, her severe depression played a large part in it. Please get help. You must be well for your child to be well. Make a list of things you need and how to get them and one step in front of the other. Yes you can!