Realistic fitness in your 30s

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
There is a reason why over 60% of Americans are overweight and not all of them have genetic conditions. You don't need to assume that I think less of people for being overweight, I am merely saying that in some cases it's avoidable and is a result of decisions people make. I don't care what decisions other people make, I care about what decisions I can make for myself.

This.
Sure she sounds harsh and politically incorrect but it IS the truth. I get what OP is asking - given that we age, there are some aspects of physical decline that ARE avoidable and we like to sugar coat it.

Look at women (and men for that matter) from some other countries. French and Japanese women for example. They walk, take public transit, have more active and clean lifestyles, eat more natural foods and eat LESS. And they stay thin and tight well into their 40s and 50s and after having children.

The problem is not only everyday choices from laziness but the American WAY OF LIFE. Too many hours in the office, too much driving, too many convenience food options, natural food too expensive. In other countries natural food is the default. It is possible to live like Japanese or French women in America but it is much more difficult, inconvenient, and expensive. And for some it might be near impossible. You could argue that socialist countries like Norway and Sweden are also more conducive to healthy aging, because they have free healthcare and better work/life balance.

So, in short, OP, it is possible to keep your figure or close to it while you age, but you have to opt out of the standard American lifestyle. The best way to do that is move abroad.

Ok, I can’t speak to Japanese women, but French women stay thin, in part, because they smoke. There’s a French woman on this board who denies it, but I’ve been to France multiple times in the past few years, and to my right and left, every time, French women are puffing away. So it’s not all about having a “clean” lifestyle, it’s also about appetite reduction through nicotine.

Also, most French women are thin, but not necessarily “tight” as PP said - they generally don’t work out as much or weight train as is popular in America, and although they may walk more in daily life, many are what people here like to call “skinny fat.” And yes, they smoke to suppress appetite.

The idealization of other cultures is tiresome.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
There is a reason why over 60% of Americans are overweight and not all of them have genetic conditions. You don't need to assume that I think less of people for being overweight, I am merely saying that in some cases it's avoidable and is a result of decisions people make. I don't care what decisions other people make, I care about what decisions I can make for myself.

This.
Sure she sounds harsh and politically incorrect but it IS the truth. I get what OP is asking - given that we age, there are some aspects of physical decline that ARE avoidable and we like to sugar coat it.

Look at women (and men for that matter) from some other countries. French and Japanese women for example. They walk, take public transit, have more active and clean lifestyles, eat more natural foods and eat LESS. And they stay thin and tight well into their 40s and 50s and after having children.

The problem is not only everyday choices from laziness but the American WAY OF LIFE. Too many hours in the office, too much driving, too many convenience food options, natural food too expensive. In other countries natural food is the default. It is possible to live like Japanese or French women in America but it is much more difficult, inconvenient, and expensive. And for some it might be near impossible. You could argue that socialist countries like Norway and Sweden are also more conducive to healthy aging, because they have free healthcare and better work/life balance.

So, in short, OP, it is possible to keep your figure or close to it while you age, but you have to opt out of the standard American lifestyle. The best way to do that is move abroad.

Ok, I can’t speak to Japanese women, but French women stay thin, in part, because they smoke. There’s a French woman on this board who denies it, but I’ve been to France multiple times in the past few years, and to my right and left, every time, French women are puffing away. So it’s not all about having a “clean” lifestyle, it’s also about appetite reduction through nicotine.

Also, most French women are thin, but not necessarily “tight” as PP said - they generally don’t work out as much or weight train as is popular in America, and although they may walk more in daily life, many are what people here like to call “skinny fat.” And yes, they smoke to suppress appetite.

The idealization of other cultures is tiresome.

I agree. They are often skinny fat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Basically I want to know how far hard work can get me and what is inevitable with age.

Hard work and a lifetime of fitness will get you far, but what is inevitable is that you will have to accept changes - to your body, your looks, your performance. It is also inevitable that you will be more injury prone eventually and will have to adapt your workouts and expectations. What is also inevitable is that things will happen to your body that your lifestyle and fitness level will not be able to control. Eventually your skin will get saggier and flabbier even if you maintain weight and muscle tone, especially if you have kids and then again after menopause. Your joints will have wear and tear, so you will have to be smarter about how you maintain your fitness level. You may end up with osteopenia or osteoporosis even if you lift weights. You may develop high blood pressure unrelated to lifestyle factors by a certain age.

These are all things that I've seen or experienced in either myself or others who have been fit, lifelong exercisers. In my experience, however, the biggest changes come in your forties. Aside from some luck-of-the-draw pregnancy and child bearing effects, you can probably maintain your level through most of your thirties.

I think best way to maintain fitness as you age is to workout smarter - more HIIT and low impact work, more careful weight training, greater variety of workouts, incorporating things like yoga/pilates/barre in which there is strong emphasis on good form and control, instead of long sessions of highly repetitive explosive exercises.

If by lifting weights, you mean 5-pounders...then yes, you will suffer bone density loss. I think it's possible to be fit and age gracefully. Just look at J. Lo, Angela Bassett and Halle Berry...these women show that it's totally possible.

They are not white...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
There is a reason why over 60% of Americans are overweight and not all of them have genetic conditions. You don't need to assume that I think less of people for being overweight, I am merely saying that in some cases it's avoidable and is a result of decisions people make. I don't care what decisions other people make, I care about what decisions I can make for myself.

This.
Sure she sounds harsh and politically incorrect but it IS the truth. I get what OP is asking - given that we age, there are some aspects of physical decline that ARE avoidable and we like to sugar coat it.

Look at women (and men for that matter) from some other countries. French and Japanese women for example. They walk, take public transit, have more active and clean lifestyles, eat more natural foods and eat LESS. And they stay thin and tight well into their 40s and 50s and after having children.

The problem is not only everyday choices from laziness but the American WAY OF LIFE. Too many hours in the office, too much driving, too many convenience food options, natural food too expensive. In other countries natural food is the default. It is possible to live like Japanese or French women in America but it is much more difficult, inconvenient, and expensive. And for some it might be near impossible. You could argue that socialist countries like Norway and Sweden are also more conducive to healthy aging, because they have free healthcare and better work/life balance.

So, in short, OP, it is possible to keep your figure or close to it while you age, but you have to opt out of the standard American lifestyle. The best way to do that is move abroad.

Ok, I can’t speak to Japanese women, but French women stay thin, in part, because they smoke. There’s a French woman on this board who denies it, but I’ve been to France multiple times in the past few years, and to my right and left, every time, French women are puffing away. So it’s not all about having a “clean” lifestyle, it’s also about appetite reduction through nicotine.

Also, most French women are thin, but not necessarily “tight” as PP said - they generally don’t work out as much or weight train as is popular in America, and although they may walk more in daily life, many are what people here like to call “skinny fat.” And yes, they smoke to suppress appetite.

The idealization of other cultures is tiresome.

I agree. They are often skinny fat.

I am probably the french woman PP mentioned who always denies cigarette is the (only) reason why french women are thin .. so i’ll Come repeat my line . I always recognize how much french women in Parisian cafe smoke. A lot. You can compare that to NY women 10 years ago, my guess is it is somewhat similar levels. Now:
1- there is a difference between social smoking and daily smokes, french women are reducing their consumption every year. What you see on Parisian terrasse is not representative of what those same women smoke everyday. Social smoking on WEs is a big thing in Paris. But no question french women still smoke way more than Americans.
2- all of my girlfriends who are now mothers and over 35 stopped smoking when they had their first kids around 30, and those former smokers are still rail thin... my sisters in law and my mom never smoke and they are still rail thin. When I go home I am comparatively fat (and at 5”5, 116 pounds I know I am not)
4- you are all right on the fact that they are however skinny with no muscle tone. And more often skinny fat. Fitness and muscles are not a thing. The ideal look is not the same as in the USand nobody on this thread would want a french woman body.

But to conclude, stop thinking the reason you are not thin is because you are virtuous enough not to smoke. French women just don’t eat as much, period. Some use cigarettes as an appetite suppressant but it is not the main explanation. It is a cultural standard. And if you are used not to eat a lot you are not as hungry. Japanese women do the same. In both cultures it is fine to feel hungry between meals, and to embrace the empty stomach feeling. Here if you say that people think you are anorexic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
There is a reason why over 60% of Americans are overweight and not all of them have genetic conditions. You don't need to assume that I think less of people for being overweight, I am merely saying that in some cases it's avoidable and is a result of decisions people make. I don't care what decisions other people make, I care about what decisions I can make for myself.

This.
Sure she sounds harsh and politically incorrect but it IS the truth. I get what OP is asking - given that we age, there are some aspects of physical decline that ARE avoidable and we like to sugar coat it.

Look at women (and men for that matter) from some other countries. French and Japanese women for example. They walk, take public transit, have more active and clean lifestyles, eat more natural foods and eat LESS. And they stay thin and tight well into their 40s and 50s and after having children.

The problem is not only everyday choices from laziness but the American WAY OF LIFE. Too many hours in the office, too much driving, too many convenience food options, natural food too expensive. In other countries natural food is the default. It is possible to live like Japanese or French women in America but it is much more difficult, inconvenient, and expensive. And for some it might be near impossible. You could argue that socialist countries like Norway and Sweden are also more conducive to healthy aging, because they have free healthcare and better work/life balance.

So, in short, OP, it is possible to keep your figure or close to it while you age, but you have to opt out of the standard American lifestyle. The best way to do that is move abroad.

Ok, I can’t speak to Japanese women, but French women stay thin, in part, because they smoke. There’s a French woman on this board who denies it, but I’ve been to France multiple times in the past few years, and to my right and left, every time, French women are puffing away. So it’s not all about having a “clean” lifestyle, it’s also about appetite reduction through nicotine.

Also, most French women are thin, but not necessarily “tight” as PP said - they generally don’t work out as much or weight train as is popular in America, and although they may walk more in daily life, many are what people here like to call “skinny fat.” And yes, they smoke to suppress appetite.

The idealization of other cultures is tiresome.

I agree. They are often skinny fat.

I am probably the french woman PP mentioned who always denies cigarette is the (only) reason why french women are thin .. so i’ll Come repeat my line . I always recognize how much french women in Parisian cafe smoke. A lot. You can compare that to NY women 10 years ago, my guess is it is somewhat similar levels. Now:
1- there is a difference between social smoking and daily smokes, french women are reducing their consumption every year. What you see on Parisian terrasse is not representative of what those same women smoke everyday. Social smoking on WEs is a big thing in Paris. But no question french women still smoke way more than Americans.
2- all of my girlfriends who are now mothers and over 35 stopped smoking when they had their first kids around 30, and those former smokers are still rail thin... my sisters in law and my mom never smoke and they are still rail thin. When I go home I am comparatively fat (and at 5”5, 116 pounds I know I am not)
4- you are all right on the fact that they are however skinny with no muscle tone. And more often skinny fat. Fitness and muscles are not a thing. The ideal look is not the same as in the USand nobody on this thread would want a french woman body.

But to conclude, stop thinking the reason you are not thin is because you are virtuous enough not to smoke. French women just don’t eat as much, period. Some use cigarettes as an appetite suppressant but it is not the main explanation. It is a cultural standard. And if you are used not to eat a lot you are not as hungry. Japanese women do the same. In both cultures it is fine to feel hungry between meals, and to embrace the empty stomach feeling. Here if you say that people think you are anorexic.

Just adding to my post : I fully agree that idealization of other cultures is tiresome ... it can be interesting to learn from differences but there is no perfect model and as a french woman I personally love the fitness and health oriented American model. (My french friends are highly amused by the amount of time I spend explaining to them the benefits of HIT, paleo diet, Pilates or spirulina..)

[Anonymous]

I love France and regard it as the second best country after America. Part of what makes me love France is their fierce sense of national identity, which makes them similar to Americans on a number of levels. But I do find the "well french women are perfect" commentary tiresome.

Even so. The French pp is correct that the problem in the US is that we have an inflated sense of what a normal amount of food is. I have been several different weights and at the moment, in my early 40s, I am the fittest I have ever been. Body fat at 17%, skinny waist, visible muscle tone. I feel great. And... I got here by eating way less than you believe is healthy. I can do an intense workout, eat only 1000 calories that day, and not go to bed hungry because when you only eat a little, you don't get as hungry. No, I don't do that every day. But my point is, if fat is normal, maybe normal isn't as healthy as we think and having hungry days is just fine for your body.

Getting back to the subject, OP. No amount of exercise will spare you from aging. Okay? And in this dog eat dog world, 30 is not too early to start preventative botox. I did when I turned 30. Paid dividends. Are you using retinol? Because if your anti aging plan is just to run more, I've got to warn you that your peers who face aging head on with a syringe and diet plan on are gonna look much better than you a decade from now.

[Anonymous]

I look better than you and I don't exercise regularly.

[Anonymous]

Japanese women are #goals when it comes to taking care of themselves. Great wholesome diet and skincare routines. One example of a Japanese woman who looks great in spite of kids is Marie Kondo. I cannot believe she has two daughters!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think if you will remain healthier and 'intact' if you don't birth any children. Childbearing takes a negative toll on women's bodies. Not just the stretchmarks and the aesthetics but you are at a large risk of pelvic floor issues, incontinence and prolapse, which also affects your capacity and attitude toward working out. Women are gonna jump on me for saying this, but don't shoot the messenger.

There's also the lack of sleep, which often leads to poor eating choices because sleep deprevation lowers levels of lepitin, which suppresses appetite while raising levels of ghrelin, which increases appetite. And then your kids get sick one day after the next, or have colic, or are super early risers, which really can interrupt your exercise schedule in addition to your sleep. Also some women's thyroids get out of whack after a pregnancy. That can be addressed, of course, but sometimes finding the time and energy to take care of yourself after giving birth and looking after young ones can be difficult.

Also regarding age: arthritis or injuries can put a stop to certain exercises. You don't always have control over those physical issues.

Life often throws a wrench into the best laid plans. Always good to have that perspective so you're not caught unaware.

[Anonymous]

OP, what does your mother look like at her age? When did she and her sisters go through menopause? If they went through it relatively early, you will also be a candidate for early menopause, and that is something to think about in terms of your ability to maintain your fitness levels. I'm not saying it's impossible after menopause to be svelte, muscular, and taut.,.. but you'll be shocked at what happens to your body without you changing anything in your eating or exercise routine when you get to perimenopause. Hormones are a beast.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think if you will remain healthier and 'intact' if you don't birth any children. Childbearing takes a negative toll on women's bodies. Not just the stretchmarks and the aesthetics but you are at a large risk of pelvic floor issues, incontinence and prolapse, which also affects your capacity and attitude toward working out. Women are gonna jump on me for saying this, but don't shoot the messenger.

There's also the lack of sleep, which often leads to poor eating choices because sleep deprevation lowers levels of lepitin, which suppresses appetite while raising levels of ghrelin, which increases appetite. And then your kids get sick one day after the next, or have colic, or are super early risers, which really can interrupt your exercise schedule in addition to your sleep. Also some women's thyroids get out of whack after a pregnancy. That can be addressed, of course, but sometimes finding the time and energy to take care of yourself after giving birth and looking after young ones can be difficult.

Also regarding age: arthritis or injuries can put a stop to certain exercises. You don't always have control over those physical issues.

Life often throws a wrench into the best laid plans. Always good to have that perspective so you're not caught unaware.

This - lots of people I know, DH included, were seriously into fitness, especially running, in their 20s and 30s...and then got injured, knee injuries, herniated disks, and so on. DH can’t run at all anymore, so he swims a few times a week and walks a lot, but it’s just not the same and he doesn’t enjoy it so it’s become a chore the wayvrunning bever was for him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Oh man. I could have said the same - that I "loved my body" - at age 30. I'm now 36, and have had 2 kids in the last 5 years. I'm 5'5", 120 lbs, 25 inch waist, and I do competitive powerlifting, so I'm quite dense and strong. BUT I do not look the same that I did at age 30 with the same stats. Not. At. All.

You need to accept that your body WILL change. I look in the mirror and I'm like, why is this skin getting kind of soft and flappy?!?! My bodyfat percentage is still low, I'm still in great shape. And YET.... it is still happening.

My advice is just to keep it up, a mix of weight training (HEAVY!) and cardio (I also just got a Peloton and love it!), and some yoga for flexibility. The key, really, is whenever you find yourself in a "slump", find a way to get out of it. I've had several slumps over the last six years - mostly related to pregnancy and the stress of parenting - and I've been committed to getting back into it so I feel good again. Oh, and it helps that my DH is super into working out and being active as well!

Also, eating really well ultimately pays off. I eat mostly Paleo, and almost entirely unprocessed foods, and I have since my mid 20s. Although I no longer look like I did when I was 30, I still look substantially younger than my friends who are the same age!

This is because you had your children later in life. I had all mine in my 20s when the skin had more collagen, so no single stretch mark event though one of my baby's were 9lb. I didn't exercise much in my 30s as I was in grad school and then getting post-graduate degree with three small kids. I stayed skinny, but not super fit (even thought I was very active). I got back to my regular exercising routine in my mid-late 30s. I am mid 40s now, 5'3' 118 lb, 26 inch waist (I didn't measure recently, but just bought jeans size 26 and they fit loose). I have very demanding job, so my exercise routine is not as intense as OPs.

My body did CHANGE, but for the better. I am very toned now, with a lot of muscle definition. I look so much better than I was in my 30s for sure.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh man. I could have said the same - that I "loved my body" - at age 30. I'm now 36, and have had 2 kids in the last 5 years. I'm 5'5", 120 lbs, 25 inch waist, and I do competitive powerlifting, so I'm quite dense and strong. BUT I do not look the same that I did at age 30 with the same stats. Not. At. All.

You need to accept that your body WILL change. I look in the mirror and I'm like, why is this skin getting kind of soft and flappy?!?! My bodyfat percentage is still low, I'm still in great shape. And YET.... it is still happening.

My advice is just to keep it up, a mix of weight training (HEAVY!) and cardio (I also just got a Peloton and love it!), and some yoga for flexibility. The key, really, is whenever you find yourself in a "slump", find a way to get out of it. I've had several slumps over the last six years - mostly related to pregnancy and the stress of parenting - and I've been committed to getting back into it so I feel good again. Oh, and it helps that my DH is super into working out and being active as well!

Also, eating really well ultimately pays off. I eat mostly Paleo, and almost entirely unprocessed foods, and I have since my mid 20s. Although I no longer look like I did when I was 30, I still look substantially younger than my friends who are the same age!

This is because you had your children later in life. I had all mine in my 20s when the skin had more collagen, so no single stretch mark event though one of my baby's were 9lb. I didn't exercise much in my 30s as I was in grad school and then getting post-graduate degree with three small kids. I stayed skinny, but not super fit (even thought I was very active). I got back to my regular exercising routine in my mid-late 30s. I am mid 40s now, 5'3' 118 lb, 26 inch waist (I didn't measure recently, but just bought jeans size 26 and they fit loose). I have very demanding job, so my exercise routine is not as intense as OPs.

My body did CHANGE, but for the better. I am very toned now, with a lot of muscle definition. I look so much better than I was in my 30s for sure.

Oh man, where are you that having kids in your early 30s is "later in life"?? I often feel like I'm one of the youngest moms when I'm with other parents.

But seriously, you are right that women bounce back way faster, and better, when they are younger. I've been with my DH since college, an part of me wishes we'd just had kids in our early 20s and THEN focused on our careers, instead of focusing on our careers, then scaling back to have kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh man. I could have said the same - that I "loved my body" - at age 30. I'm now 36, and have had 2 kids in the last 5 years. I'm 5'5", 120 lbs, 25 inch waist, and I do competitive powerlifting, so I'm quite dense and strong. BUT I do not look the same that I did at age 30 with the same stats. Not. At. All.

You need to accept that your body WILL change. I look in the mirror and I'm like, why is this skin getting kind of soft and flappy?!?! My bodyfat percentage is still low, I'm still in great shape. And YET.... it is still happening.

My advice is just to keep it up, a mix of weight training (HEAVY!) and cardio (I also just got a Peloton and love it!), and some yoga for flexibility. The key, really, is whenever you find yourself in a "slump", find a way to get out of it. I've had several slumps over the last six years - mostly related to pregnancy and the stress of parenting - and I've been committed to getting back into it so I feel good again. Oh, and it helps that my DH is super into working out and being active as well!

Also, eating really well ultimately pays off. I eat mostly Paleo, and almost entirely unprocessed foods, and I have since my mid 20s. Although I no longer look like I did when I was 30, I still look substantially younger than my friends who are the same age!

This is because you had your children later in life. I had all mine in my 20s when the skin had more collagen, so no single stretch mark event though one of my baby's were 9lb. I didn't exercise much in my 30s as I was in grad school and then getting post-graduate degree with three small kids. I stayed skinny, but not super fit (even thought I was very active). I got back to my regular exercising routine in my mid-late 30s. I am mid 40s now, 5'3' 118 lb, 26 inch waist (I didn't measure recently, but just bought jeans size 26 and they fit loose). I have very demanding job, so my exercise routine is not as intense as OPs.

My body did CHANGE, but for the better. I am very toned now, with a lot of muscle definition. I look so much better than I was in my 30s for sure.

Oh man, where are you that having kids in your early 30s is "later in life"?? I often feel like I'm one of the youngest moms when I'm with other parents.

But seriously, you are right that women bounce back way faster, and better, when they are younger. I've been with my DH since college, an part of me wishes we'd just had kids in our early 20s and THEN focused on our careers, instead of focusing on our careers, then scaling back to have kids.

I didn't say later in life to mean it is late to have children. I was talking from the biology standpoint -- the skin will loose it elasticity drastically at 30s, and even more in 40s to be able to return to the same condition after pregnancy. Unfortunately, it doesn't matter how fit or strong you are, it just the skin is not the same as it was at 20s. I know several women who had children in late 30s and ended up with no stretch marks, but it is rather an exception.

[Anonymous]

^^ I also forgot to add: going through sleep deprivation is much easier on your body at 20s than in 40s. I had no problem with sleepless nights, had no dark circles under my eyes, was totally energetic. Now, as I am in my 40s and my kids are in college and high school, I cannot even imagine not get at least 8 hours of sleep. If I miss my sleep in my 40s, it affects not only my looks, but overall feelings.