What’s your empty nest plan?

[Anonymous]

Staying in our area, we moved from DC area a few years ago to someplace we thought we’d retire to. Will definitely downsize, will not need this much space or yard. Will look for first floor bedroom SFH or TH.

[Anonymous]

Will probably stay in our close-in suburban house until the kids are post-college and then move to a condo or TH in the city. Would consider giving the house to one of our kids if they want it once they are ready for that stage of life (yes, we know the tax implications). We could rent during the in-between time. But I don't want to stay long term in suburbia - time to get back to city living.

[Anonymous]

Sell our house in Burleith - split the equity two ways - move into a 2 BR condo downtown or at the Wharf, and buy a small condo at the beach in DE or Ocean City.

[Anonymous]

Currently have a house in Virginia, and a vacation house in Martha's Vineyard.

Kids are 14 and 17

Our plan is to slowly start spending more time at our vacation home as the kids start doing their own thing and I slow down at work (H can work from anywhere), and in 7-10 years, I will fully retire and we will sell make our vacation home our primary residence, and sell our house in VA.

We will probably buy a condo in DC, or possibly in Boston or somewhere close to where our kids settle.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This reminds me of “Father of the Bride 2” where they sell the fabulous family home to go to a condo/have sports car. Only Steve Martin is on board and then they buy it back.

The house I grew up in has such great memories. My parents stayed in it. It’s like another family member. All of my memories and my kids with the grandparents feature that house and backyard.

+1
I can't imagine moving from this house that holds so many memories. I'm imagining the grandkids coming to stay with us, holidays here, etc. Makes me so sad to think of moving to a condo or apt. We'll definitely be staying here.

[Anonymous]

I'll only be 50 when my only leaves for college. I work at a university with good instate benefits, so I plan to stay there if he attends an institution where he can get the tuition break. Our house is pretty modest and close to downtown, so I hope to stay where we are for the time being. After that I wouldn't be surprised if we transfer somewhere for my husband to pursue other job opportunities. His company has hubs in absolutely awful cities, but moving there would let us sock away a ton of cash and hopefully retire early. Hoping to retire somewhere near the mountains (TN or NC) or perhaps near where our son lands.

[Anonymous]

Divorce first, then build a small house in California and spend a lot of time traveling. Will rent out the home on Airbnb for a few months a year and spend that time seeing and living in places instead of visiting for a few days or a week. My kids have grown up traveling all over so I think they'll enjoy joining me for part of the time and I'll see them in the states as much as possible! Few rescue dogs, hopefully the kinds that like to chill on the couch. Motorcycle rides in the good Cali weather, and hopefully a boyfriend or two to keep me busy as well.

[Anonymous]

I expect my children to be scattered all over, and I will see them if and when I feel like seeing them. I have three adult sons and I have three grandchildren. We talk on the phone. I raised my sons the same way that I am raising their teenage siblings. To follow their dreams, no matter where those dreams may take them. Life is meant to be enjoyed. Your kids cannot fly if you clip their wings. I never stay in one place for long. There is too much to see and to experience. Freedom comes with sacrifice. Learn to let go and you will be happier.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I expect my children to be scattered all over, and I will see them if and when I feel like seeing them. I have three adult sons and I have three grandchildren. We talk on the phone. I raised my sons the same way that I am raising their teenage siblings. To follow their dreams, no matter where those dreams may take them. Life is meant to be enjoyed. Your kids cannot fly if you clip their wings. I never stay in one place for long. There is too much to see and to experience. Freedom comes with sacrifice. Learn to let go and you will be happier.

bulshit

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This reminds me of “Father of the Bride 2” where they sell the fabulous family home to go to a condo/have sports car. Only Steve Martin is on board and then they buy it back.

The house I grew up in has such great memories. My parents stayed in it. It’s like another family member. All of my memories and my kids with the grandparents feature that house and backyard.

+1
I can't imagine moving from this house that holds so many memories. I'm imagining the grandkids coming to stay with us, holidays here, etc. Makes me so sad to think of moving to a condo or apt. We'll definitely be staying here.

I think I'd feel that way if we had stayed in the home that our kids were born and largely raised in. But we moved when the oldest was entering HS and the youngest MS. We have made some good memories in this house but the move made me realize that those memories will go wherever we do.

If moving make sense for us I don't think we'll have a hard time moving.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Right now my kids are in 10th and 8th.

I worry about my first kid possibly boomeranging back home. It's hard to tell...some days I think it will never happen; other days I think, how can this kid ever get to self-sufficiency?

In contrast, my youngest is very self-sufficient and when she leaves the nest, I can see her flying high and not looking back.

So, I'm thinking when the youngest is in her first or second year of college, we rent out our house and rent an apartment somewhere; maybe in the same city, or in another city where my DH's firm has an office.

I'm the poster quoted, and since I wrote that I think I have to revise my plans. My goal with my potential boomerang kid was to get her to college at least one plane flight away (not driving distance) as I was worried she'd appear on our doorstep when the slightest thing went wrong. And then rent out the house to give no way for her to boomerang.

However; I've just discussed this with someone who has three kids and one is that potential boomerang kid. She wanted her boomerang kid to go to college far away, and was bummed when that kid chose a local university (but living in a dorm.). Turns out, though, that college was hard on that kid and she developed an eating disorder and depression.

The mom told me she was now so glad the kid chose the local university because that kid now comes home twice a week and the parents are observing and helping her. Had she gone to the other big-name school across the country, the mom would have had to pull her.

So. I guess I can't make plans until I see how my potential boomerang kid develops, and then go from there. I keep reading here that they grow up a lot in high school, and she does seem to be making progress. It's just so slow in comparison to my youngest, who seems ready to function as an adult at 14.

If anyone feels like their former 16 y.o. was never going to grow up, and they did and fledged just fine, I'd like to hear it! I want to make my empty nest plans too! LOL

[Anonymous]

No clue! We talk about it all the time but aren't sure where we want to be. I'd love to be driving distance with our children when they launch. It would be nice to be in a climate that is a little warmer in the winter and we definitely need to be in a place that has a metropolitan area close by.

Besides the location, I also worry that my DH will drive me crazy. We definitely need to have plenty to do together and separately.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This reminds me of “Father of the Bride 2” where they sell the fabulous family home to go to a condo/have sports car. Only Steve Martin is on board and then they buy it back.

The house I grew up in has such great memories. My parents stayed in it. It’s like another family member. All of my memories and my kids with the grandparents feature that house and backyard.

+1
I can't imagine moving from this house that holds so many memories. I'm imagining the grandkids coming to stay with us, holidays here, etc. Makes me so sad to think of moving to a condo or apt. We'll definitely be staying here.

I think I'd feel that way if we had stayed in the home that our kids were born and largely raised in. But we moved when the oldest was entering HS and the youngest MS. We have made some good memories in this house but the move made me realize that those memories will go wherever we do.

If moving make sense for us I don't think we'll have a hard time moving.

+1

I feel bad for people whose memories are attached to four walls. Not exactly the definition of "memories" or "freedom". I don't feel I would "score" anything by not having lived elsewhere before old age, nor would my kids.