Women do you look down on women who didn't marry good providers?

[Anonymous]

My DH is a good provider but I’m a great financial manager. So no matter the income, I can adjust and make things work. I’m grateful he takes on the external work stress and lets me handle home life. He’s a good man.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I look down on women who look at their husbands as providers.

Why? Men are unable to bear children and generally expect women to do the lion's share of child care. A man who wants a family and expects to do less than 50 percent of the care should be a good provider.

Your expectations are about three decades stale.
Get out more and see what dads are doing nowadays with their kids and at home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No, but I do have an instinctual aversion to women who talk about men as "providers."

Yup.

[Anonymous]

If all you got is providing income it had better be very very high and you better get it structured up so your taxes aren't 50% or 60% in.

Nothing hits harder that working 60 hours a week and realizing 30 hours of that is for the government to redistribute. Just cut your hours or find a job where you can be home at 5:30pm and enjoy your family.

[Anonymous]

I do look down on men that are not good providers for their family this can also include dead beats. For example, if your wife or child's mom has to work 3 jobs to pay bills and you only work 1. I've seen many situations where husbands are simply not hard workers. Or the wife gets sick and the husband doesn't want to work more. Anyone that says they aren't bothered by that is lying.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, but I do have an instinctual aversion to women who talk about men as "providers."

Yup, this.

Another vote for this!

[Anonymous]

I think I judge work ethic. Does this person work hard and also contribute to the household? That's what I judge.

I completely agree with this. There are families where the DH is a SAHD but works hard around the house, and I respect that.

[Anonymous]

I don’t look down at them at all. I do wonder if it’s something they ever thought about before marriage though. It was probably my biggest priority in a spouse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DH is a good provider but I’m a great financial manager. So no matter the income, I can adjust and make things work. I’m grateful he takes on the external work stress and lets me handle home life. He’s a good man.

So you married your meal ticket. And no matter how little he makes you can "adjust" lol that's some next level laziness.

[Anonymous]

I look down on people who expect everything to be given to them, like women who marry "good providers" and don't have a dime to their name.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nope, I look down on women who deliberately do exactly nothing for 10-30 years and then start sobbing in divorce court when they realize the cash grab is over.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Exactly.

I get seriously annoyed (I wouldn't say look down, but it annoys the hell out of me) by women who marry predictable assholes who have zero interest in their children.

I have a friend of mine like this. It was clear that this guy was going to be a selfish asshole, and she married him anyway.

When she starts whining about how he does not value spending any time with his kids, about how is is 50% asshole, I just make up an excuse and end the conversation.

And no, he is not rich, and she makes a pretty good living.

Treat 'em like shit, boys, and they'll love you forever.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t look down at them at all. I do wonder if it’s something they ever thought about before marriage though. It was probably my biggest priority in a spouse.

Me too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I look down on women who look at their husbands as providers.

Why? Men are unable to bear children and generally expect women to do the lion's share of child care. A man who wants a family and expects to do less than 50 percent of the care should be a good provider.

Your expectations are about three decades stale.
Get out more and see what dads are doing nowadays with their kids and at home.

Women who denigrate the value of child rearing and home keeping are not advancing women's rights, quite the contrary. Again, I worked the whole time my kids were young. My husband helped a lot. We had a housekeeper twice a week. It was still stressful beyond belief. This site is constantly visited by overstressed young mothers who are thinking of divorce because their husbands don't help at home or with kids.

[Anonymous]

Why not marry multiple men, and aggregate their incomes just so you can cruise the Caribbean?