After meeting future niece

[Anonymous]

I’m realizing that I may not have posted about the party like I had thought. This is why this isn’t making sense.

[Anonymous]

Stop pushing so hard.

You don't need a big party.

You just need to be nice and welcoming and let the pouty toddler come around.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Stop pushing so hard.

You don't need a big party.

You just need to be nice and welcoming and let the pouty toddler come around.

I already had the party. I’m very nice to those kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am confused. What is a future niece? Your fiance's niece? In any case, it's a 3 year old. Ignore her.

+1.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am confused. What is a future niece? Your fiance's niece? In any case, it's a 3 year old. Ignore her.

+1.

Sister’s future step daughter.

[Anonymous]

I dunno OP. You don't come off as very nice at all. Or very smart.

[Anonymous]

It's kind of bitchy to say you'll watch one kid and not the other. I know you want to come off as "poor me and my dd. Everyone is ganging up on us". But I suspect the rest of the family has a totally different story from your DD and you are perfect and this 3 year old is the devil

[Anonymous]

Don’t judge a 3 year old. This is par for the course.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's kind of bitchy to say you'll watch one kid and not the other. I know you want to come off as "poor me and my dd. Everyone is ganging up on us". But I suspect the rest of the family has a totally different story from your DD and you are perfect and this 3 year old is the devil

The boy wanted to stay and play longer, the girl did not. I'm not saying that she is the devil. I'm saying she has zero discipline and has been hateful and disrespectful. She sits there and YELLS at me. Makes talk to the hand gestures if I so much as say "Hi Larla." She will ask me to help her with something such as getting her a drink so I will ask what she would like to drink and she will shout "don't talk to me." I guess this is normal behavior and I shouldn't expect her dad to say anything to her. I'm NOT the only one who feels that way. Future BIL's mom said something to future BIL about how she lacks discipline and my mom said something to my sister.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What does get on mean?

God it's scary to think someone like you has 2 children.

I have 1 child. I was also a preschool teacher for years with a background in early childhood education. I’m not upset with the 3 year old. I’m upset with my sister and her fiancé. For instance I hosted the 4th of July celebration at my house. My sister would yell at DD constantly when she wasn’t even doing anything. They’re fine disciplining future nephew but won’t even say that’s not nice to future niece. It got to where even my mom told her she’s way out of line for how she’s treating DD.

Wait, what? Your entire OP is about the future niece and now it turns out you are mad at your sister and her fiance for how they treat your daughter? This is all very confusing but I agree it's best just to say you can't make it to the Christmas plans.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don’t judge a 3 year old. This is par for the course.

I'm not judging a 3 year old. It's not her fault that her parents don't discipline her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What does get on mean?

God it's scary to think someone like you has 2 children.

I have 1 child. I was also a preschool teacher for years with a background in early childhood education. I’m not upset with the 3 year old. I’m upset with my sister and her fiancé. For instance I hosted the 4th of July celebration at my house. My sister would yell at DD constantly when she wasn’t even doing anything. They’re fine disciplining future nephew but won’t even say that’s not nice to future niece. It got to where even my mom told her she’s way out of line for how she’s treating DD.

Wait, what? Your entire OP is about the future niece and now it turns out you are mad at your sister and her fiance for how they treat your daughter? This is all very confusing but I agree it's best just to say you can't make it to the Christmas plans.

I bailed on todays plans. I'm mad that they will discipline my daughter and not their own. If little larla decides she doesn't want DD on the couch they'll kick DD off the couch. If little Larla decides she wants to necklace that sister handed to DD they will take the necklace back. I'm sorry but this is NOT okay with me. Sorry that this makes me the devil that I don't like a 3 year old shouting at me and not having any sort of discipline.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What does get on mean?

God it's scary to think someone like you has 2 children.

I have 1 child. I was also a preschool teacher for years with a background in early childhood education. I’m not upset with the 3 year old. I’m upset with my sister and her fiancé. For instance I hosted the 4th of July celebration at my house. My sister would yell at DD constantly when she wasn’t even doing anything. They’re fine disciplining future nephew but won’t even say that’s not nice to future niece. It got to where even my mom told her she’s way out of line for how she’s treating DD.

Then effing LEAVE THEM ALONE. Stop trying to force closeness. Drop the whole idea of a joint birthday party or whatever. Just leave them alone--they've got a lot to sort out for themselves at the moment. "The 4th of July celebration," as if it is a must-do, compulsory event for your family. Just celebrate with your own, nuclear family and maybe some friends. Drop the rope on your sister and her situation for a while. FFS.

-NP

If you had any reason comprehension whatsoever you would have read that I’m trying to drop the rope. I just wanted advice on how to do so without hurting feelings. I threw a party for my entire family. It had nothing to do with forcing a relationship with my future niece. I’m not allowed to celebrate with my parents and brothers now?

Please do everyone a favor and stop. Accept invites, just don't plan anything for a while. Just take a breather.

[Anonymous]

And to make matters worse, future BIL has announced he will be moving here in a few months.

[Anonymous]

Meanwhile future nephew is such a sweet kid. He talks a lot and his dad thinks it makes him feminine so he's constantly disciplined for talking to much "like a girl". I'm telling you, they're ridiculous. The poor boy is disciplined for what they consider annoying behavior but little Larla can shout at adults and get whatever she wants.